Be U: HAPPY SPRING

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

HAPPY SPRING

I do so love spring. Every Spring I would send flowers to a my parents and parents-in-law and say 'Happy Spring - Spring has Sprung' or something weird like this.

I love seeing the trees bloom, hear the birds sing, watch the tulips and daffodils come up out of the ground. It's a glorious time of year. Animals have their babies and the air and sun gets warmer. Rolling down my car windows and feeling the 'happy' breeze, I start my dethaw. Everything comes back to life; usually, including me.

Monday, March 21 is the first full day of Spring. (Does this occur around the world?) I'm thinking not; only because I know during our summer, other countries experience winters and vice versa. Perhaps, it is where our earth is in conjunction with the sun that changes all this. I guess it would have been a good idea to listen better in science class!

Anyway, it's Spring for me and I will do my spring dance along with the trees, birds and flowers.

My full intent is to still be me when I arrive home. My home takes a lot of upkeep (as do most homes) and I suppose it's time for a spring cleaning. Open the windows (although that probably won't come for two months or so for me) and let in the wonderful air. Things have shifted and what use to be warm (60s F) in April usually doesn't come til May, the earliest. Hey, maybe I'll get lucky this year.

Weather, everywhere, is changing. How beautiful Mother Nature can be; can be just as excruiatingly disastrous as we have and are recently seeing. AND, there is no stopping Mother Nature. She will do what she will do. Tonight, through the full moon, perhaps we can all choose to look at our moon and send some good, loving energy to Japan and each other in hope of resurrecting life to a more together, more real, more secure and loving daily routine.

United we stand Divided we fall. There is truth to this. And, with one's self as well. When I am living who I am, feeling who I am, being and acting who I am - I am whole and have so much more to offer. When I am divided, uncertain and not being me - oh boy; not good!

My wish is that we all spring into action and make a conscious decision to allow the real U to spring from within and, in all your glory, share U with your world.

Each and every one of us 'humans' have 'glorious' in us. When we come from a place of our love and our truth - the Universe becomes available to us. We are born with this. I want to stop limiting myself.

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My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!