Happy New Year 2015

I'm achy today; inflamed.  I feel like my breath is escaping me some and I'm a bit stiff. 

It is damp and wet outside; a perfect day to hang and just be.... and this is what I am doing. 

I am ready to ring in the new year and I have some good food and my family to do this with.  How blessed I am.

I offered on my Facebook page, "Just 9Be U",  to perhaps, put one (or several) things on a piece of paper that you do not want to bring into the new year with you and then burn the paper and let it (them) go...  I wish this for you as well; if it feels right for you to do so.

I am choosing to believe that what we all have experienced and 'traveled' through these past few years with so much change, unknowingness, adversity, challenges, really good things, world connectivity, and as our own present self, we will now bring into fruition our best selves from the inside out.

I have this belief that if we all live what is inside of us to live; from the truest depth of our self, through love; individually, together... we win.  !

I so want us all to win.  To create the world that feels happy, loving, safe and supportive for all us humans.  Even as we know sadness and disparity, we also know support, love and ability to face and live through the pain that we encounter from being 'mere' human.

I hope you have a wonderful transition into the New Year 2015 and I hope you choose to bring your true self with you, lovingly, into every breath and every situation you take and encounter.

May you live YOU in 2015...   Just be 'SO YOU'.   (as told to me by Mya Breman) 

Greatest Exam of All

I think that I may be living through my greatest 'exam' of all.  With the new scleroderma doctor telling me that many scleroderma patients do not have pain and live without pain management; and the new therapist that I just connected to telling me that she doesn't understand why I feel certain ways and most women she knows would not feel the way that I do about certain things, I am not feeling very supported professionally just now.  Yes, if he can get me pain free, I am open to it.  I'd say hip hip hooray...   If she can get my happy on speaking this way, I am open to it. 

I've been extremely lucky for the past 15-30 years hooking up with some awesome doctors.  I know this now more than ever.  I often told my Rheumatologist of over 30 years that he has saved me many times.  I understand now that there have been a lot more times than I truly understood.  I have never been told by a therapist that there is no reason for me to feel the way that I do; nor 'should' I. 

I am feeling like this just may be a 'gift' for me to 'walk my talk'.  To trust my own inner knowing.  To KNOW, BELIEVE and PROCEED FORWARD in trusting myself that I know more about how I feel and what is real for me more than any person outside of myself --  To listen to my true inner voice first.

What to do; what to do; what to do then.

As I look up at the sky just now there is a very dark gray sky as the backdrop for the trees. How interesting.

My dogs are barking at the lighting landscapers in the back yard.  The trickle of the fountain is annoying rather than soothing.

Hoot!  What a test!

What will I do...  How will I handle my health concerns...  How will I handle me...

Time will tell.   On this exam, the goal is not 100.  The goal is to stand completely and lovingly in my own and whole truth.

I am going for a cranial sacral session this afternoon at the Upledger Institute.   I'm anxious and excited to see what comes up for me.  This is the company that I was trained by in Cranial Sacral I and II. 

If you feel like you, too, are taking a great exam...

May you weather the storm, learn to dance in the rain and bring your truest of true selves with you.

Connect to and Own the wonder of You.   This is my greatest wish for us all.  

Merry Christmas 2014

Merry Christmas to all who celebrate it.   Merry-ness to all.

I am in my new home decorated kind of nice and it surely is comfortable.  I am hooked on this Facebook 'party' and I see many people struggling with feeling allowed to be who they truly are; especially with family. 

May I offer to bring your true and open self with you to whatever celebration you attend or create.  May you be courageous enough to show your family/loved ones who you really are and how you really feel.  Baby steps are allowed.

I am learning to do this in everything and I am learning that it is what brings me my greatest peace.  I walk away from the pain if it is the last thing that I do.  I am so lucky that my family is now at a point where they know to question me and encourage me just a little further than what I know how to give at times.  When I believe that what I am feeling are childish feelings/beliefs, I find myself hesitant.  This is when it really is wonderful when my loved ones encourage me to share.  Just thinking and judging my feelings this way is what stops me from sharing.

What I feel is real.  Perhaps, I don't need to judge my feelings at all.  Just let them be here.  Let me own them.  Let me share them.  This is truly where the miracles happen.

Even if I don't get the response I want or think I need, I know that I am standing in my truth.  My truth is beautiful.  I only want to love and be loved.

Perhaps, now is a better time than ever - while we are all gathered, many feeling stressed or discomfort...  be the first to walk in your truth; from your heart.   You will only gain YOU and what an awesome gift that is for all.

You know what is best for you.  I honor where you are.   I wish you to be fulfilled and living in your loving truth.  Let them see your vulnerability; your sadness; your need for love. 

Merry Christmas and the gift of YOU is what we all need.  You were born this way for a reason.  You were born this way to complete and add to the puzzle of life.  Bring your puzzle piece with you.

May you be true and loving to you which in turn is true and loving towards others.  Only you know if today is the day.... or if there is a person or person(s) you can do this with. 

I wish you joy, peace and love from within, without.

North House

My beautiful and once loved greatly (and will always be in my heart) house in Pennsylvania is being sold now at 10:00 a.m.   New owners have come and the pressure to upkeep it and the haven that it has provided me with will be over on paper.

I have made it to this day.   I do not allow myself to feel too much as of this moment. I dimly feel.  I know there is pain here.  I know there is hope.  I know there is unbelievable gratitude.  I know there is a time to let go and move on.

This is my time (for real) as the papers get signed.

I cry.  I have tears.  I know not of great elation... yet (perhaps). 

I know I am where I belong and awesome things are yet to be lived.

I say goodbye to my fabulous Shambala and that is all I do for now.   I say goodbye.

May you be where you are and allow yourself - your whole self to embrace what is through love, hope and 'inner knowing'.  May you be open to where it may lead you.  May you believe that awesome things are coming your way....  It is 100% possible.

Let us live on and through the love in our hearts with whatever life presents to us.  My wish.

Be the love you wish to live with.

Christmas Desires and Spirit

I hear many people saying that they want to skip Christmas; they don't want to be obligated or know that they 'should' do this or they 'should not' do that.

I understand.  I hear them.

I'd like to offer to not do or worry about any of the above.   To start the new tradition of doing Christmas from our hearts and enjoying it, presenting it, being it, living it, doing it, breathing it in the way that makes ourselves most happy and/or content.

I believe that as we do this, we encourage others to do the same.  Christmas is about the birth of Jesus.   Christmas spirit is about good will toward men and women.  Christmas is about being together with those that support our happy and the person we are.  It is about supporting others' happiness and who they are. 

May you have the Christmas that warms your heart, encourages your dreams and lives through the spirit of sharing love, truth and peace.

May you allow this to be your tradition.  May you be honest that this is what you wish to be so; for yourself, for all those that you love and for even those you do not know.

May you give through truth and love to bring you 'home' to you. 

STOP whatever you were previously doing and breathe.  Feel what it is you want and go for this.  Love yourself through enough not to get mad at people for 'making' you do or be or act any way that is not who you are today.

Cheery Christmas to one and to all.  You are allowed to follow your cheer. 

As I Sit

As I sit here contemplating life; thinking about when I feel good the world looks good.  When I feel off the world looks off...

It is no wonder that loving ourselves from the inside out is probably the most important thing we can do for our world.

If we all were happy within ourselves, life would be a more upbeat thing.  As many are hurt and bewildered, life can be hard and challenging.

Yes, even when we are happy, life can still be challenging.  However, we just may be stronger to take on these challenges, let them go or know exactly how to process them better. 

Just what if our challenges were for our growth and when we accept them as such, growth happens easier and faster.

I'm hurting this morning physically, which in turn is turning my emotions to less than fun.  Hearing my new rheumatologist say that people with scleroderma do not need pain medicine hurt.  I have scleroderma and I am in pain.  The weather is fluctuating  from 80 during the day to 60 deg F and lower at night.  I feel this.  I don't know why but I do.

My body swells up, my hands become more stiff and purple and I become sad.   Life doesn't seem as beautiful.

It is my truth and I will walk through it open to the beauty because I do believe there is beauty here always.

I know I will ask my new rheumatologist how many scleroderma patients he has and I know he will say none.  I know this because he just got out of school and why they are being trained in scleroderma (it was not a common medical word or training 30 years ago), he has told me he has only seen it in training.

I fight with taking medicine and not taking narcotics.  I know they help my ability to do more.  What if it is better for me not to do more.   It's very confusing and I walk through the confusion as I don't know what else to do.

I live me as I am now until I evolve as future me. 

May you live you as you are now and look for the beauty as you evolve into the future you.

Now is all we have.  It is enough.  You are perfect just as you are. 

                                                    Unknown

Merry Me

I'm wanting to offer for you to notice how you feel when you read these words. 

May you notice your initial reaction.  May you realize the reaction you would like to experience.   May you breathe and do one thing that will get you closer to your chosen reaction if you are not quite there.

I wish you 'merry' from the inside out.

Between

I am between getting pedicures and beauty treatments and getting blood tests and health tests.  I am between Christmas and settling in nicely to my new home while my old house is going to settlement in less than one week.

I am happy and content.  I am threatened and agitated.

I am in peace and calm and experiencing pain and harsh emotions.

I'm not sure what to say or how to say where I'm at except for the above sentences and truth. 

I walk on knowing that I am living in the now and fulfilled as best as I can be just now.  

I'm yearning for fun and happiness.   I'm allowing frustration and sadness.

I guess it's fair to say I am experiencing all that life has to offer us 'mere mortals' and it is okay.

May you experience the truth of you; the truth of your life and the truth of your emotions.  May you experience all that is present for you to experience through compassion, self love and inner knowing.

'Grow' on.

December 15, 2010

Just for the Fun of it, I thought I would look at my post for this date back when I first started blogging.  This is what was present on today's date back in 2010. 

I wish for your mind to participate where your body is so your thinking stays in the Now...

......


Right now, I'm sitting here with my feet up in the air and my three little dogs and one cat trying to get the poor little mouse (who I might add is not so small).

I tried to get him with a large cup, but he ran.  I believe he is up the Christmas tree. 

Life is full of moments, isn't it.

I imagine some of you are cybershopping, wrapping, working, catching up, and planning for tomorrow.  I'm hoping all of you will soon be having your sleep time or rest time or quiet time.

Guess I'm going to have to look up mouse and it's spiritual meaning.  I'm just going to have to.  I can't resist. 

I know it means scattered thinking.  We all know I have this!

Til next time.  Please don't forget about you.  You are the most important person in someone's life!  Yours.

How many of us would be sitting in a room on a computer with a mouse hidden in the Christmas tree right  smack next to us?  

Talk about courage.  If that thing runs by me or near me, I'm done. ha.

------

The Tapestry

This is a repost from December 2010.

I'm 'stealing' this from a woman who was Head of Volunteers for a Hospice Company in my community.  She has the biggest heart, most kind soul and gives of herself like I have seen no other give.  She is a special friend and lady.  I am blessed to know her.

She writes:  "A story that makes sense to me is that our life is a tapestry.  On this side we see the knots and tangled threads, sometimes making it hard to understand what it all means.  On the other side, God sees the beautiful finished picture.  Dear one, my picture would not be complete without you woven into it."

Nothing more needs to be said.  Beauty emanates from this for me.

May you believe that the 'knots and tangled threads' in your life are making a beautiful picture that will one day be complete. 

                                   My mother did this probably 40 years ago...  I miss her. 

Mad Hatter

I'm waking up with my 'mad hat' on this morning.  I'm mad.  I'm angry.  I'm irritable.  I'm fidgety.  I'm unfocused.

My daughter leaves tomorrow for a week up north with family and friends.  My husband is done traveling until next year.  I am involved with the 'remnants' of decorating and my front and back lawn is a bit torn up and a new layout is in progress.

I feel the need to run.  I feel the need to know freedom.  I feel the need to drive and see where I end up.  I don't know if I will give myself permission to do this today.  I hope I will soon.

Even the trickling of the water in the fountain is agitating to me just now.  Yikes!

I have become 'unbalanced' and I NEED TO PLAY.

I believe giving myself what I need will make me an easier person to be around.

May you give yourself what you need.

What

I'm 'hearing' that what I am saying is what I mostly need to hear...

As I am sharing this from my Facebook page,  I am reminded of this.

"Be the beauty.  Love yourself through.  Share your true self.  Walk on with gentle strength.  Live Free."  Just 9Be U, LLC

 

May you live free.

 

                                                            Unknown

 

12/13/14

My life does not feel like it is flowing smoothly just now.  And, I know in the big picture of things, it is.

Settlement on my north house is before Christmas.  We are having landscape work and there is discussion about a fish tank being created for us.  My doctor and I are still creating a relationship and learning how best to treat symptoms of pain and dis-ease.  I walk on and through the best I know how just now. 

May you know peace believing that the big picture of your life is beautifully in sync, order and happening for the greatest good of the growth and experience that is YOU -- only you can be you.

Choose to participate with kindness, gentle strength and love as often as you can.

I wish you peace within as you connect to it without.

Sad is Just a Feeling

"It’s okay to be sad.  You don’t owe anyone a performance of being okay when you feel like you’re falling apart.  It isn’t your job to smile or hide your truth to make other people feel more comfortable.  If it gets awkward, let it be awkward.  If people try to silence your pain by telling you to get over it and cheer up because you’re no longer fun or you’re ruining the mood, you don’t have to push away your sadness.  You have to honor your feelings and trust that you don’t need anyone’s permission or approval to feel what you feel.  You don’t ever have to sacrifice your self care for the sake of people who only want you around when it’s easy and comfortable.  Their discomfort isn’t about you — it’s about them and their own limitations, and no matter what they think or say, you deserve to give yourself permission to feel whatever it is you feel.  You’re allowed to show your feelings honestly.  You’re allowed to talk about your pain and reach out for support.  You’re allowed to scream and wail and cry.  You’re allowed to be sad."
—Daniell Koepke

May you allow yourself to feel, be and express everything that you are.

                                                     Unknown

Here

'Here' ...   as in present.

Being present in this moment, I am here.  I feel the cat on my lap.  I hear the heater on (for the first time in this new house as it is 55 deg F outside this morning).  I hear the trickling of water traveling down the fountain.  I see the shadow of the palm trees dancing on the side of the house. 

I feel pain.  I feel discomfort.  I feel constriction and tightness in my face, skull, hands and feet.  My immediate reaction is not to want to feel this.  My 'follow-up' reaction is asking what is my body wanting to convey to me.  I can honor myself by not fighting what I feel and participate.  My first reaction may be to run.  My 'follow-up' reaction is to embrace myself.

Embracing feels more magical than running.   Although running sometimes wins out, just now I embrace the ringing in the ears and the tension within.   I find myself taking a deep breath.   I find myself doing a mental body scan.   I find myself being here in this moment with my truth.

I feel whole.  I feel loved.   Just now, here, in this moment.

May you be aware of what you are doing...  Are you running...  Are you embracing....  Are you doing something else...  Is there something you can do that you'd rather be doing....

My wish is that you do just this.

May you choose wisely and lovingly how you live in this moment that is your truth; your life; your choice;... your moment.

 

Y O U

"Today you are You, that is truer than true.  There is no one alive who is Youer than You."   Dr. Suess

May you enjoy, have fun, allow and own being YOU.

                                                           lizclimo.tumbler.com

So Many

I have so many emotions flying, hanging, sorting and traveling all through and around me.  With a December 22 settlement date for my once beloved home in Pennsylvania, there are plenty of people touched, accessed, acknowledged and challenged to get this job done. 

It is a bitter pill.  It is a chill pill.  It is (what feels to me) past time and it is a sad ending.  It is a blessed ending.  It is an ending that I hope will bring forth a whole new beginning for the many that were involved with upkeeping, running, living, experiencing the best; and recently, the worst of 'Shambala'.  It surely feels like this house and property has a life of its own. 

It will never be what it was for me.  I'm forever grateful that I, along with many people I cherish, got to live and experience my home as a resort and a place of great serenity and beauty. 

I miss the ease of all it had to offer.  I don't miss the work or the expense.

I have created much stress for myself these past two years and allowed what was to challenge and beat me; to challenge and 'grow me forward'. 

I have sores on my fingers and tension in my body and exhaustion in my mind.  I have hope in my heart, love in my being and a happy 'knowing' in my wholeness.

I'm uncertain exactly where I am as I don't seem to want to pinpoint it.  I have feelings of where I'm going -- to work to support others in their own growth.  I have no concrete-ness of anything.  And, it feels okay.

I have faith and trust in the process of life and the Universe.

So, as I twirl within all that is, I look forward to stopping at a path or two and walking down it/them into a settled, fulfilled self and connected to all that I am and all that surrounds my human life. 

I am still getting 'acquainted' with my new doctor.  I am still open to creating a new and best solution here.

I am not in what feels like ease just now.   I am in what feels very real and life altering and I am okay with it.  I am different.   I am okay with it.

I love on.

May you love on and through what you feel, know and are just now.  You are the warrior of your life and you have everything you need to live everything that you are from the inside out.  May you do just this.

About

It is not about how many people I connect to, discuss with, or encounter - it is not about how many people I befriend or tweet ...  It is about the one person who is smiling just a little brighter from the inside out because of something we shared. 

My wish is that...

May you smile just a little bit brighter from the 'something' that connected us to each other.

Greatness

"Your greatness may not be great to every one but that doesn't make it less great."  Rita Owens, Queen Latifah's Mom

May you allow, own, live and be your 'greatness'.

Barre Spirit

I went to a "Pure Barre' class with my daughter yesterday and it was quite fun.  My body was very happy to move!  There were a few moves that were impossible for me and the rest of the class was doable.

Today, I wake up to body parts that I forgot I had!  lol

We are in the Christmas Spirit and I feel balanced somewhat to be getting things done and not overdoing it.  I'm aware of same anyway!

During this Christmas season, if you like a traditional holiday, may you give it to yourself.  May you create it for yourself through what you feel, how you're life presents itself to you and with love and gentleness of the true Christmas Spirit.

You are in control of you...  May you stay aware of the answer to the questions:  What is my goal in this moment?  Am I breathing?  Am I treating myself the way I want to treat myself?  Am I doing this in the most beneficial way to allow peace, ease and joy into my life which, in turns, opens the same 'doors' for everyone you encounter.

May you bring your truth and love into the true Christmas Spirit that is happiest on you.

Is it At All

Is it at all possible that this is what some; many; all of us are living through.....as our world unites around, within and amongst us....

I believe we have grown so much and so fast as a whole and it is possible we are now at one of the most significant and, perhaps, most difficult individual challenges (and worldwide challenges)  - which is our deepest rooted fear(s) becoming pronounced.  We are being 'touched' and even forced to look deeply inside and to be very aware and connected to this truth; our own total truth. 

May you embrace as much of your truth as you can through love and trust.

Trust the process. Let it play out as we bring our truest (and sometimes scariest and most difficult) selves into each situation from the place of love within; without.  

If you are having a rockin', easy time just now...  Enjoy it - every breath!

Namaste'. Be open to allowance, ease and love as you live You into this moment.

Good Night

As I get ready to go in and read for the night, I stop by the computer to 'check in'.  The Christmas lights are on and the temperature is a cool balmy.  (figure that one out!)

My cat is here wanting to type with me (really wants my attention) and I'm waiting for my daughter to come down to say good night as my husband is on the road.

My hands are a bit in discomfort and I'm happy to be going to rest.

I look forward to a brand new day; a new brand new week and all the fun and brilliant things it will show me.

I am reminded of the song 'Good Night Sweetheart' and I wish you an extra pleasant night tonight (whenever you get to yours).

May you always have a song in your heart, a dance in your soul and a note to remind you that there is always something good in your life.