May you have a happy day whether you are 'dressing up' or 'putting on masks' or being your authentic self. May you know great fun and/or possibly take a giant step(s) out of great courage.
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Happy Halloween
I believe that today can, possibly, be a day of huge leaps and bounds. Big steps can be had. Wonderful and positive change is possible.
May you have a happy day whether you are 'dressing up' or 'putting on masks' or being your authentic self. May you know great fun and/or possibly take a giant step(s) out of great courage.
Spirit Science and Metaphysics/FB
May you have a happy day whether you are 'dressing up' or 'putting on masks' or being your authentic self. May you know great fun and/or possibly take a giant step(s) out of great courage.
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
Heavy
I'm feeling a heaviness today. I surely don't want it and it is here. I'm pushing forward while asking this heaviness to teach me what it is here to teach me. Do I dare thank it for presenting itself to me because I believe it is here to help me change something that does not bring me joy...
I want ease. I want to wake up and just feel like breathing in the light air, open to the world and all the people I meet; if only just a nod or a hello.
One beautiful lady I met this morning was bright eyed and bushy tailed with her 'good morning' and I told her I wasn't that awake yet. I haven't been this 'awake' in a long time. There is something heavy that still weighs me down.
I'm sure it is my belief. I'm thinking it's responsibility. Perhaps, most, in truth, it is how I look at responsibility of my dogs. (Here comes the 'dog' thing again.) What is it that I tie myself down to these dogs about. Could it be as simple as I never thought a small dog was really a 'dog'... I think they need to be coddled more; treated differently than German Shepherds or Australian Shepherds. It also feels like the abandonment issue hasn't been completely dissolved from my being in this situation as well. *THOUGHTS ARE WHAT MAKE US WHO WE ARE.*
I brought the small dogs home. I've only known to be with bigger dogs until these guys. I love my small dogs. Hey, I can love a bird greatly. And, I have to release them some so I can feel more free than I'm allowing myself to feel. I am the only one stopping myself from going to lay in the sun. I am the only one that is stopping myself from going out for a drive. In creating a profession, I am the only one that stops myself and the only one that can make it happen. I am the only one that can allow or disallow myself to be. This is good news/bad news.
No one is going to come and take my hand and show me the exact way. Sure, there are people out there that will help me, have wonderful (and maybe not so helpful) opinions, and even guide me -- and, I'm the only one that can create and live the life that I want to create and live. And, in truth, I wouldn't want it any other way.
I am thinking this way, I must be ready to do something different. Hip Hip Hooray and Yikes.
I create today to be the kind of day that I want it to be. I am open to lighter, brighter feelings and moods. I release the heaviness as I feel it, process it and let it go.
I'll see if this does 'anything' for me!
May you choose to create the kind of day you want to live in.
I want ease. I want to wake up and just feel like breathing in the light air, open to the world and all the people I meet; if only just a nod or a hello.
One beautiful lady I met this morning was bright eyed and bushy tailed with her 'good morning' and I told her I wasn't that awake yet. I haven't been this 'awake' in a long time. There is something heavy that still weighs me down.
I'm sure it is my belief. I'm thinking it's responsibility. Perhaps, most, in truth, it is how I look at responsibility of my dogs. (Here comes the 'dog' thing again.) What is it that I tie myself down to these dogs about. Could it be as simple as I never thought a small dog was really a 'dog'... I think they need to be coddled more; treated differently than German Shepherds or Australian Shepherds. It also feels like the abandonment issue hasn't been completely dissolved from my being in this situation as well. *THOUGHTS ARE WHAT MAKE US WHO WE ARE.*
I brought the small dogs home. I've only known to be with bigger dogs until these guys. I love my small dogs. Hey, I can love a bird greatly. And, I have to release them some so I can feel more free than I'm allowing myself to feel. I am the only one stopping myself from going to lay in the sun. I am the only one that is stopping myself from going out for a drive. In creating a profession, I am the only one that stops myself and the only one that can make it happen. I am the only one that can allow or disallow myself to be. This is good news/bad news.
No one is going to come and take my hand and show me the exact way. Sure, there are people out there that will help me, have wonderful (and maybe not so helpful) opinions, and even guide me -- and, I'm the only one that can create and live the life that I want to create and live. And, in truth, I wouldn't want it any other way.
I am thinking this way, I must be ready to do something different. Hip Hip Hooray and Yikes.
I create today to be the kind of day that I want it to be. I am open to lighter, brighter feelings and moods. I release the heaviness as I feel it, process it and let it go.
I'll see if this does 'anything' for me!
May you choose to create the kind of day you want to live in.
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Crepuscule
Crepuscule meaning twilight, dusk (dictionary.com)
Today's word of the day at Dictionary.com
The crepuscule of the day feels prevalent throughout and it also feels more like the dawn.
Is this the dawning of our world anew... Is this the dusk of the world as we knew it...
May you offer your loving truth to yourself and our world. You are present at this time as YOU and you matter, you are perfectly enough and just what if your truth is the light that is needed for YOU and our world to succeed in greatest harmony and love. Shambala on.
THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU.
Today's word of the day at Dictionary.com
The crepuscule of the day feels prevalent throughout and it also feels more like the dawn.
Is this the dawning of our world anew... Is this the dusk of the world as we knew it...
May you offer your loving truth to yourself and our world. You are present at this time as YOU and you matter, you are perfectly enough and just what if your truth is the light that is needed for YOU and our world to succeed in greatest harmony and love. Shambala on.
THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU.
Unknown
I am living in the 'unknown' world just now. I see pain, agony, hardship, struggles. I see love, deeper connections, support, ease. I hear conversations on truth as it is today.
What is really the truth...
Do any one of us know for sure...
I don't know.
I'm in a strange 'land' feeling strange. I have low back discomfort on my left side. I think it is most likely from overdoing it at the gym yesterday. It is a ball of tightness or tension or both.
I have been awake since 4 a.m. I'm relaxed and comfortable in my body and breath except for the awareness of my core. This is quite a change for me. I've always been strong and connected to my body except my core. My stomach always eluded me. It wouldn't 'participate' like the rest of my body. Now I am feeling like my stomach is what I can work with the most and the rest of my body is just being. Yes, this is strange. Yes, I am strange. I'm going with it because I am learning of nothing else just now as prevalent as speaking my truth. I can't help myself any more. It is what I have. It is what I have worked hard to have. Now that I have it - I know 'strangeness'. I am uncertain what to do with it. I am afraid of where it will take me. And, I am so exhilarated that I stand stronger in who I am as I create anew, evolve, transform, and remain ME.
So, as it was a dark, sun coming up, quiet except for the birds singing walk this morning.. it all feels strange.
Strange - "unusual, extraordinary, or curious; odd; queer" (dictionary.com)
May you trust that what you feel is exactly what experience is best for you in each moment. LIVE. Live the real you in love, trust, truth, and from your soul's vast 'knowing'. Live on.
What is really the truth...
Do any one of us know for sure...
I don't know.
I'm in a strange 'land' feeling strange. I have low back discomfort on my left side. I think it is most likely from overdoing it at the gym yesterday. It is a ball of tightness or tension or both.
I have been awake since 4 a.m. I'm relaxed and comfortable in my body and breath except for the awareness of my core. This is quite a change for me. I've always been strong and connected to my body except my core. My stomach always eluded me. It wouldn't 'participate' like the rest of my body. Now I am feeling like my stomach is what I can work with the most and the rest of my body is just being. Yes, this is strange. Yes, I am strange. I'm going with it because I am learning of nothing else just now as prevalent as speaking my truth. I can't help myself any more. It is what I have. It is what I have worked hard to have. Now that I have it - I know 'strangeness'. I am uncertain what to do with it. I am afraid of where it will take me. And, I am so exhilarated that I stand stronger in who I am as I create anew, evolve, transform, and remain ME.
So, as it was a dark, sun coming up, quiet except for the birds singing walk this morning.. it all feels strange.
Strange - "unusual, extraordinary, or curious; odd; queer" (dictionary.com)
May you trust that what you feel is exactly what experience is best for you in each moment. LIVE. Live the real you in love, trust, truth, and from your soul's vast 'knowing'. Live on.
Monday, October 28, 2013
No Title
I have no title for this blog post because nothing is on my mind to post. I sit here wondering what will come of this post with no hope whatsoever. However, enthusiasm is present.
I had a low key day today with my beautiful and wonderful daughter. I do not get days like this with her often and I am cherishing every moment. She will be 19 very soon and I know her wings are growing.
I think 19 was my favorite year for me of all time. I was out of high school, working at a good job and having the time of my life through independence, freedom and feeling like the whole world was my playground and anything was possible. I lived each day like this. Note: the whole world to me was the Universe without countries, boundaries but with endless possibilities to 'play' with and explore. I was so open to explore and I surely was doing just this!
I had my own apartment; a rental unit for the summer months down at the beach, a brand new car and freedom. There was nothing else I wanted at that age. While I had battled with finger ulcers and pain through the scleroderma; at this time, no professional knew what was going on and I was so young and carefree I just went with it. Not until I was 21, was there a name and a diagnosis for my symptoms..."scleroderma". Still, I pretty much ignored what I could and lived my life to the fullest.
I worked my full time job as secretary, a part time time job as a data entry person during the week in the winter. And every summer, until I met my husband at age 25, a wonderful girlfriend and I had a rental unit down at the beach which we spent there every weekend and our 2 weeks of vacation time and even some 'sick' days. I jogged and we spent sunlight hours on the beach and we experienced the night life; day in and day out. Yes, I was having myself great FUN. I always said I work hard; I play hard.
I was not low key then!
So, today was a wonderful and relaxing low key kind of day. The weather was magical. We did a visit to the barn, a walk in nature and we just spent time in the same room, with her doing her school work and me just doing nothing really.
She will head back to her dorm tonight and I will look at houses and now cars. My lease on my car is up and I have the option of getting a new car. I like me a fun car. I always enjoyed my cars. Comfort, fun, thinking I'm pretty cool always came with a car and a special license plate. LOL I must be cool in here somewhere yet!
My husband comes for 11 days soon and I am so looking forward to having him here with me. I've missed him terribly. We will see how long this lasts once he arrives! lol I know it will be wonderful having him here.
So, I have no words of wisdom. I have no thoughts that may have some meaning.
May you sometimes 'just be' and let life live through you without any judgement, strife, worry, or 'have to's'. May you have rest and joy in your heart if only so you can get out there and have yourself some great fun whatever that means to you.
Unknown
I had a low key day today with my beautiful and wonderful daughter. I do not get days like this with her often and I am cherishing every moment. She will be 19 very soon and I know her wings are growing.
I think 19 was my favorite year for me of all time. I was out of high school, working at a good job and having the time of my life through independence, freedom and feeling like the whole world was my playground and anything was possible. I lived each day like this. Note: the whole world to me was the Universe without countries, boundaries but with endless possibilities to 'play' with and explore. I was so open to explore and I surely was doing just this!
I had my own apartment; a rental unit for the summer months down at the beach, a brand new car and freedom. There was nothing else I wanted at that age. While I had battled with finger ulcers and pain through the scleroderma; at this time, no professional knew what was going on and I was so young and carefree I just went with it. Not until I was 21, was there a name and a diagnosis for my symptoms..."scleroderma". Still, I pretty much ignored what I could and lived my life to the fullest.
I worked my full time job as secretary, a part time time job as a data entry person during the week in the winter. And every summer, until I met my husband at age 25, a wonderful girlfriend and I had a rental unit down at the beach which we spent there every weekend and our 2 weeks of vacation time and even some 'sick' days. I jogged and we spent sunlight hours on the beach and we experienced the night life; day in and day out. Yes, I was having myself great FUN. I always said I work hard; I play hard.
I was not low key then!
So, today was a wonderful and relaxing low key kind of day. The weather was magical. We did a visit to the barn, a walk in nature and we just spent time in the same room, with her doing her school work and me just doing nothing really.
She will head back to her dorm tonight and I will look at houses and now cars. My lease on my car is up and I have the option of getting a new car. I like me a fun car. I always enjoyed my cars. Comfort, fun, thinking I'm pretty cool always came with a car and a special license plate. LOL I must be cool in here somewhere yet!
My husband comes for 11 days soon and I am so looking forward to having him here with me. I've missed him terribly. We will see how long this lasts once he arrives! lol I know it will be wonderful having him here.
So, I have no words of wisdom. I have no thoughts that may have some meaning.
May you sometimes 'just be' and let life live through you without any judgement, strife, worry, or 'have to's'. May you have rest and joy in your heart if only so you can get out there and have yourself some great fun whatever that means to you.
Sunday, October 27, 2013
Which
As I was walking my dogs this morning, my thoughts went to....
Hmmm
Which is the more truthful statement...
Be wary of the people/situations that create stress in me.
or
I allow people/situations to make me feel stressed.
which, in turn, can be...
I feel stressed just now. Be wary of myself (my thoughts).
Perhaps, when this happens, I can Take a deep breath and know my goal in the moment.
Oh, gosh, it always comes back to me!!.. lol darnit yikes
May you know your power of awareness and choice.
May you be open to having just the type of day that brings you exactly what you wish for.
May "you know you got it if it makes you feel good". Janis Joplin Go here - May you choose to go 'here' as often as possible. Go to doing/thinking/being what creates peace in your soul.
Spirit Science and Metaphysics (FB)
Hmmm
Which is the more truthful statement...
Be wary of the people/situations that create stress in me.
or
I allow people/situations to make me feel stressed.
which, in turn, can be...
I feel stressed just now. Be wary of myself (my thoughts).
Perhaps, when this happens, I can Take a deep breath and know my goal in the moment.
Oh, gosh, it always comes back to me!!.. lol darnit yikes
May you know your power of awareness and choice.
May you be open to having just the type of day that brings you exactly what you wish for.
May "you know you got it if it makes you feel good". Janis Joplin Go here - May you choose to go 'here' as often as possible. Go to doing/thinking/being what creates peace in your soul.
Saturday, October 26, 2013
Moving On/Staying Present
I awake to let the dogs out in the wee hours of the morning. The truth is the dogs wake me to take them out in the wee hours of the morning!
I begin to ponder if I'm always moving on can I really be present to each moment. I have no certainty about this. I do not know.
I am present to what is as I'm open to moving on with ease, love, truth and acceptance.
When I fight what is, when I want 'things' to be different than what they are; what my truth is... this is when I feel the most out of sync, frustrated, unhappy and, perhaps, even stuck. Fear stands before me and moving through isn't the most welcoming thing on my mind.
When I accept what is, even though I have much (or even little) emotion around it, I feel different. I am not battling out on a limb of my truth. I am with acceptance and my mind is clearer to elicit change and a peace can consume me/enter me and I stand stronger in my truth to create anew from this place of truth.
Is this the peace in the chaos that I have searched for and has often eluded me... Is this the 'simple' way of creating peace in any chaos... Acceptance of the chaos; trust of the situation; and allow whatever emotions arise to play out and stand strong in myself, while knowing love, may just equal peace in the chaos.
It just may...
May you be open to 'playing' your situations out with as much acceptance as you can muster knowing that life changes all the time and you are loved; you matter; you are enough.
Walk through each moment with awareness, acceptance and trust yourself to be okay through the valleys of your human experience. Share your truth, live your truth, 'Be' your truth (because you already are whether you participate/accept it or not)..........It just may be easier when you participate through peace of same.
My wish for you.
I begin to ponder if I'm always moving on can I really be present to each moment. I have no certainty about this. I do not know.
I am present to what is as I'm open to moving on with ease, love, truth and acceptance.
When I fight what is, when I want 'things' to be different than what they are; what my truth is... this is when I feel the most out of sync, frustrated, unhappy and, perhaps, even stuck. Fear stands before me and moving through isn't the most welcoming thing on my mind.
When I accept what is, even though I have much (or even little) emotion around it, I feel different. I am not battling out on a limb of my truth. I am with acceptance and my mind is clearer to elicit change and a peace can consume me/enter me and I stand stronger in my truth to create anew from this place of truth.
Is this the peace in the chaos that I have searched for and has often eluded me... Is this the 'simple' way of creating peace in any chaos... Acceptance of the chaos; trust of the situation; and allow whatever emotions arise to play out and stand strong in myself, while knowing love, may just equal peace in the chaos.
It just may...
May you be open to 'playing' your situations out with as much acceptance as you can muster knowing that life changes all the time and you are loved; you matter; you are enough.
Walk through each moment with awareness, acceptance and trust yourself to be okay through the valleys of your human experience. Share your truth, live your truth, 'Be' your truth (because you already are whether you participate/accept it or not)..........It just may be easier when you participate through peace of same.
My wish for you.
Friday, October 25, 2013
Knight
I just sent off my answers to the questions for the IDEA Journal with a short paragraph letting them know that I am uncertain if this is what they are looking for from their members. When asked what makes me different from all the other fitness professionals, my answer has to be that I haven't worked professionally for 19 years. This is a big 'yikes' to me! lol, yikes, more truth
I will see where it goes from here. And, I stepped out again. I jumped off the cliff again. It's a big deal for me to share my truth of dis-ease and, perhaps, a different kind of strength. I do know that many people know this kind of strength, yet, in the fitness world - it is, perhaps, a very different kind of strength that most consider.
So, I go to my trusty book "The Alchemical Tarot" by Rosemary Ellen Guiley and Robert M. Place and I pick two cards. These are the two that 'want' my attention.
Knight of Staffs
"Tarot Wisdom: You enjoy health and vitality. You are ready to create something new, or take on challenges in a new area. Your stamina is an inspiration to others."
Ace of Coins
"You are at the beginning of wellbeing, which could pertain to physical health, material comfort, or receiving or giving nurturing. You are on the right path to acquisitions, wealth, and success in the material world. Do not forget, however, that every manifestation in the material world emanates from the spirit.
So, yes, I like these cards. My head spins with fear. I know I have to take the chance. I know it is here for a reason. It is extremely exciting. I want to hide under the bed....
I walk on.
May you allow your truth; perhaps, even your scariest truth, to come forward and be shared. Stand strong in who you are and know that our Creator does not make mistakes.
Unknown
I will see where it goes from here. And, I stepped out again. I jumped off the cliff again. It's a big deal for me to share my truth of dis-ease and, perhaps, a different kind of strength. I do know that many people know this kind of strength, yet, in the fitness world - it is, perhaps, a very different kind of strength that most consider.
So, I go to my trusty book "The Alchemical Tarot" by Rosemary Ellen Guiley and Robert M. Place and I pick two cards. These are the two that 'want' my attention.
Knight of Staffs
"Tarot Wisdom: You enjoy health and vitality. You are ready to create something new, or take on challenges in a new area. Your stamina is an inspiration to others."
Ace of Coins
"You are at the beginning of wellbeing, which could pertain to physical health, material comfort, or receiving or giving nurturing. You are on the right path to acquisitions, wealth, and success in the material world. Do not forget, however, that every manifestation in the material world emanates from the spirit.
So, yes, I like these cards. My head spins with fear. I know I have to take the chance. I know it is here for a reason. It is extremely exciting. I want to hide under the bed....
I walk on.
May you allow your truth; perhaps, even your scariest truth, to come forward and be shared. Stand strong in who you are and know that our Creator does not make mistakes.
Tru Dat
Oh boy. Here I go. I want to resist and I don't want to resist and this time, 'least resistance' wins! I am uncertain that this is a good thing!
I'm finding myself in a 'pickle'.. at a crossroads... in a dilemma... confused, resistant, almost horrified, and wishing this wasn't my truth....
I want to support and be a part of creating a continued flow of love and ease in our world. I truly believe that I have experienced/lived this life of mine, thus far, to do just this. This is my assigned divine work. I believe this with everything that I am and feel.
-deep breath-
and, While I believe this and breathe this, I also breathe and experience fear, anguish and for a lack of a better word, confusion and anything but homeostasis.
How can I support and help the world if I don't even know how to be in it. Now, of course, I know how to be in it. I do not, however, feel that I know how to be in it. Huge. Yucky (for a lack of a better word).
I'm out and about more and I see such pain and things that are hard to stay focused on and I have no perfect description of my experience(s).
I see animals being mistreated. I see people being angry, off center, struggling, hurting, scared, frightened and lost... although 'lost' is not the best word here. I'm not sure what the best word is. It's more like we are functioning from what society has become; what society has taught us and what society labors us to function as.
I'm not sure this is a horrible thing. I am pretty sure there must be a more productive, kind, open, loving, aware, caring, easy way.
We are amidst the booming age of technology. And, while technology rocks... it is not without its stones - plenty, plenty, plenty of stones. It is like technology is leading the way and not the human mind, spirit or heart. I'm sure this is just a balancing period and I'm not sure if many of us feel and live in balanced harmony just now.
Was there ever a time humans did? I am uncertain.
I love people. I love to interact with them (once I get my brave on) and I love hearing and learning about their experiences, their thoughts, their goals, their triumphs and their challenges. Each and every one of us has all of these traits or characteristics. They are a part of being alive.
I do feel like a newbie going out into this world of technology, change, passion, and rift. Swiping of credit cards, thumbprints, software updates, e-checks, keyless entries, notebooks, computers, smart phones, smart homes, text, email, twitter, facebook, etc. etc. etc. Much of this is very cool and makes life easier 'stuff'. Why does life feel harder to me then, at times?
We are all entwined in our phones. We are all entwined with what has to be done to stay afloat. We are all entwined with each other, yet can ignore a person sitting right next to us or living in our same location. We have huge country debt. We have Americans fighting Americans. We have countries fighting countries. We have many putting each other down. We have family members hurting family members like no one else can. We have many thinking it is okay to put each other down because it's the job or the competition or 'their' fault. We are hurting our universe, our earth, our animals, our people and our children; our oceans, our air....
How do I live in a world like this and help by being a positive light... especially when all of this scares me... really, really scares me when I think about it. It feels so much easier to hide or ignore. And, hiding/ignoring is no longer an option. It is no longer an option because I'm not comfortable doing so. I'm not comfortable only healing, being, shining my light as if I think I am a light house. I've played it safe and I have grown, learned, felt, and connected to myself totally and wholly. And, I feel like I do not know how to bring this 'true self' out to play in a world so big, powerful, hurtful and scary.
I do see the beauty, the connection, the underlying love, peace, unity and strength that is just quietly waiting patiently for me to go with what I've learned and be the wuss, the weirdo, the crybaby, the weakling, the standout, the scaredy cat, the unique woman that feels the underlying beauty in each and everyone of us. I'm speaking of the spirit soul that is the most precious and beautiful thing about being alive. Each and every one of us has this. We were born. The soul came with us. We were hurt, challenged, questioned, berated, told and (some were) beaten into the humanness of walking the earth alive.
It is time to change things up. It is time to support the most scariest of persons. If I lived their life, I'm betting I'd be scary too. Anger, hatred, horribleness is born out of hurt, pain, fear and, perhaps, detachment from self because to feel is just too much to live with; to bear.
A person that can kick an animal... is not a happy or true to their deepest essence self. What it must feel like inside of oneself to enjoy someone else to suffer. One must know great pain themselves to experience or cause pain and not be affected horribly by it. One must really dislove themselves to be able to dislove another.
I don't believe there is one person alive and breathing that can totally, truly and gently love themselves and hurt another. I am not sure this is a possibility within even the human realm.
So, anyway, my question is how do I love and not let the fear of the 'scary' people, things, situations, moments, hurtful sightings and uneasy feelings make me want to run for the hills. How do I let myself - that wants to support others to find their love of themselves wholly and beautifully, while knowing of great pain, anguish and ugly - get out there and feel it, experience it, witness it all and stand strong...
I do not know. I am open to finding out and doing just this. I travel on. I travel through.
May you let the banging whispers that are uniquely yours (that you have resisted, perhaps, for a long time) lead your way to the life that is your assigned divine work. May you ask, perhaps, that it comes through you with love, truth, gentleness. and ease.
I'm finding myself in a 'pickle'.. at a crossroads... in a dilemma... confused, resistant, almost horrified, and wishing this wasn't my truth....
I want to support and be a part of creating a continued flow of love and ease in our world. I truly believe that I have experienced/lived this life of mine, thus far, to do just this. This is my assigned divine work. I believe this with everything that I am and feel.
-deep breath-
and, While I believe this and breathe this, I also breathe and experience fear, anguish and for a lack of a better word, confusion and anything but homeostasis.
How can I support and help the world if I don't even know how to be in it. Now, of course, I know how to be in it. I do not, however, feel that I know how to be in it. Huge. Yucky (for a lack of a better word).
I'm out and about more and I see such pain and things that are hard to stay focused on and I have no perfect description of my experience(s).
I see animals being mistreated. I see people being angry, off center, struggling, hurting, scared, frightened and lost... although 'lost' is not the best word here. I'm not sure what the best word is. It's more like we are functioning from what society has become; what society has taught us and what society labors us to function as.
I'm not sure this is a horrible thing. I am pretty sure there must be a more productive, kind, open, loving, aware, caring, easy way.
We are amidst the booming age of technology. And, while technology rocks... it is not without its stones - plenty, plenty, plenty of stones. It is like technology is leading the way and not the human mind, spirit or heart. I'm sure this is just a balancing period and I'm not sure if many of us feel and live in balanced harmony just now.
Was there ever a time humans did? I am uncertain.
I love people. I love to interact with them (once I get my brave on) and I love hearing and learning about their experiences, their thoughts, their goals, their triumphs and their challenges. Each and every one of us has all of these traits or characteristics. They are a part of being alive.
I do feel like a newbie going out into this world of technology, change, passion, and rift. Swiping of credit cards, thumbprints, software updates, e-checks, keyless entries, notebooks, computers, smart phones, smart homes, text, email, twitter, facebook, etc. etc. etc. Much of this is very cool and makes life easier 'stuff'. Why does life feel harder to me then, at times?
We are all entwined in our phones. We are all entwined with what has to be done to stay afloat. We are all entwined with each other, yet can ignore a person sitting right next to us or living in our same location. We have huge country debt. We have Americans fighting Americans. We have countries fighting countries. We have many putting each other down. We have family members hurting family members like no one else can. We have many thinking it is okay to put each other down because it's the job or the competition or 'their' fault. We are hurting our universe, our earth, our animals, our people and our children; our oceans, our air....
How do I live in a world like this and help by being a positive light... especially when all of this scares me... really, really scares me when I think about it. It feels so much easier to hide or ignore. And, hiding/ignoring is no longer an option. It is no longer an option because I'm not comfortable doing so. I'm not comfortable only healing, being, shining my light as if I think I am a light house. I've played it safe and I have grown, learned, felt, and connected to myself totally and wholly. And, I feel like I do not know how to bring this 'true self' out to play in a world so big, powerful, hurtful and scary.
I do see the beauty, the connection, the underlying love, peace, unity and strength that is just quietly waiting patiently for me to go with what I've learned and be the wuss, the weirdo, the crybaby, the weakling, the standout, the scaredy cat, the unique woman that feels the underlying beauty in each and everyone of us. I'm speaking of the spirit soul that is the most precious and beautiful thing about being alive. Each and every one of us has this. We were born. The soul came with us. We were hurt, challenged, questioned, berated, told and (some were) beaten into the humanness of walking the earth alive.
It is time to change things up. It is time to support the most scariest of persons. If I lived their life, I'm betting I'd be scary too. Anger, hatred, horribleness is born out of hurt, pain, fear and, perhaps, detachment from self because to feel is just too much to live with; to bear.
A person that can kick an animal... is not a happy or true to their deepest essence self. What it must feel like inside of oneself to enjoy someone else to suffer. One must know great pain themselves to experience or cause pain and not be affected horribly by it. One must really dislove themselves to be able to dislove another.
I don't believe there is one person alive and breathing that can totally, truly and gently love themselves and hurt another. I am not sure this is a possibility within even the human realm.
So, anyway, my question is how do I love and not let the fear of the 'scary' people, things, situations, moments, hurtful sightings and uneasy feelings make me want to run for the hills. How do I let myself - that wants to support others to find their love of themselves wholly and beautifully, while knowing of great pain, anguish and ugly - get out there and feel it, experience it, witness it all and stand strong...
I do not know. I am open to finding out and doing just this. I travel on. I travel through.
May you let the banging whispers that are uniquely yours (that you have resisted, perhaps, for a long time) lead your way to the life that is your assigned divine work. May you ask, perhaps, that it comes through you with love, truth, gentleness. and ease.
Thursday, October 24, 2013
Awakening
I'm not feeling 'it'. I'm not sure what 'it' is, but I think I'm not feeling it.... oh this will be a good one... egad
It is only 72 degrees here. It has dropped much. I can so feel the difference. There is a part of me that is invigorated and can breathe lighter; there is a part of me uncomfortable and chilled.
There is no sun. It is a grey day full of promise and possibilities. I'm not sure I am going to claim any of them.. Do we need to claim them for them to happen....
I hear the beautiful fountain on the pond playing it's sound of droplets, current and hurrah. I went out early this morning for the dogs and it was a beautiful pinkish sunrise that didn't quite come to fruition.
I am open to receive and give throughout this day that is mine and it's exciting to participate in it even as I slowly awaken fully.
I am still exercising regularly and I love what the weight training does for me. The strength that awakens in me, the body awareness that awakens my senses is joyful. My body is doing a happy dance that I am paying attention to it on a regular basis. It is one of the greatest joys I know. The cardio awakens my heart and strengthens the 'beat' of who I am.
My feet get numb and my grasp isn't the best and I exercise on. I move through.
May you give yourself one of the greatest joys that you know.
Joy on...
It is only 72 degrees here. It has dropped much. I can so feel the difference. There is a part of me that is invigorated and can breathe lighter; there is a part of me uncomfortable and chilled.
There is no sun. It is a grey day full of promise and possibilities. I'm not sure I am going to claim any of them.. Do we need to claim them for them to happen....
I hear the beautiful fountain on the pond playing it's sound of droplets, current and hurrah. I went out early this morning for the dogs and it was a beautiful pinkish sunrise that didn't quite come to fruition.
I am open to receive and give throughout this day that is mine and it's exciting to participate in it even as I slowly awaken fully.
I am still exercising regularly and I love what the weight training does for me. The strength that awakens in me, the body awareness that awakens my senses is joyful. My body is doing a happy dance that I am paying attention to it on a regular basis. It is one of the greatest joys I know. The cardio awakens my heart and strengthens the 'beat' of who I am.
My feet get numb and my grasp isn't the best and I exercise on. I move through.
May you give yourself one of the greatest joys that you know.
Joy on...
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
Countries United
I so enjoy seeing all the different countries 'visiting' this blog. I truly hope that we, united, from the depth of our love and understanding can create a more beautiful world.
My wish is that there be no one left out in believing this to be possible.
My wish is that togetherness of our strength in compassion, support, understanding, and even lack of understanding (with acceptance and love) can win to engage the beautiful spirit that is within all of us.
Our breath and living now at this time - on this planet together, perhaps, with the same yearning of 'knowing' and 'living' one's truth tells me that this divine force is within us all.
It tells me that we all feel; we all love, we all hurt, we all know pain, we all know wonder, we all know breath.
Our hearts beat, our muscles flex, our spirit reigns, our love boils and our fear provokes.
May you accept your heart, your muscles, your spirit, your love and your fear to guide you to the truth that is within and let this beautiful, and not always easy, truth prevail and emulate the human that you are here to be. Woo Hoo Egad
Unknown
Thank you to United States, Russia, Germany, China, Costa Rica, United Kingdom, South Korea, Poland, Philippines, Serbia, Ukraine, and Turkey for visiting my heartfelt, truthful, and often 'unique' words. May you live the 'beautifulness' of YOU. I support you in doing so. You have this. You have you.
My wish is that there be no one left out in believing this to be possible.
My wish is that togetherness of our strength in compassion, support, understanding, and even lack of understanding (with acceptance and love) can win to engage the beautiful spirit that is within all of us.
Our breath and living now at this time - on this planet together, perhaps, with the same yearning of 'knowing' and 'living' one's truth tells me that this divine force is within us all.
It tells me that we all feel; we all love, we all hurt, we all know pain, we all know wonder, we all know breath.
Our hearts beat, our muscles flex, our spirit reigns, our love boils and our fear provokes.
May you accept your heart, your muscles, your spirit, your love and your fear to guide you to the truth that is within and let this beautiful, and not always easy, truth prevail and emulate the human that you are here to be. Woo Hoo Egad
Thank you to United States, Russia, Germany, China, Costa Rica, United Kingdom, South Korea, Poland, Philippines, Serbia, Ukraine, and Turkey for visiting my heartfelt, truthful, and often 'unique' words. May you live the 'beautifulness' of YOU. I support you in doing so. You have this. You have you.
Noise
There is much 'noise' in my head today. I do not seem to let it settle on/in any one place. I visit what is going on in Pennsylvania. I think about my Uncle; it goes to planning what I want to do next now that my daughter is an adult and does not need me in the same way. Last night, the 'noise' happily took me to Hawaii and hiking the NaPali Coast, taking a helicopter ride, sightseeing for whales and snorkeling! Amazing how our minds can take us to any where at all...
I do think it can be a choice. We are the observer of our thoughts. I can pay attention to them and nay the ones that are not supportive and keep the ones that support and even feel good/fun.
We all have the gamut of thoughts. Some settle on certain ones; some of us continuously move around. Most of us have probably experienced both and much throughout the spectrum.
May you notice your thoughts and make it a good day for yourself; as very best you can. You are worth it and you are powerful. You were made this way. Perhaps, just one change in an everyday occurring thought will change your world and ours. I feel like I want to call it responsible thinking...
May you think responsibly today! (egad)
I do think it can be a choice. We are the observer of our thoughts. I can pay attention to them and nay the ones that are not supportive and keep the ones that support and even feel good/fun.
We all have the gamut of thoughts. Some settle on certain ones; some of us continuously move around. Most of us have probably experienced both and much throughout the spectrum.
May you notice your thoughts and make it a good day for yourself; as very best you can. You are worth it and you are powerful. You were made this way. Perhaps, just one change in an everyday occurring thought will change your world and ours. I feel like I want to call it responsible thinking...
May you think responsibly today! (egad)
Monday, October 21, 2013
Purpose
"Our job in this lifetime is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become it. If we were born to paint, it's our job to become a painter. If we were born to raise and nurture children, it's our job to become a mother. If we were born to overthrow the order of ignorance and injustice of the world, it's our job to realize it and get down to business." From the book "The War of Art" by Steven Pressfield.
I am believing and realizing more and more that I don't think I want to be who I am. I am uncomfortable with who I am. Mostly, because I tell myself that who I am is so different. I tell myself I am too soft, too sensitive, too needy. I tell myself that my life story is very unique and many, most likely, will not be able to understand me. I don't want to be called a wuss. lol
I'm also realizing that when I resist telling my truth and/or living my truth, I feel overwhelmed with confusion. I feel distraught. I feel totally unsettled. And, there is only one thing to do. Tell my story as I know it to be. Here, in the recess of a unadvertised blog, a quiet blog; a one woman blog... I have found shelter to share my truth. I have learned to feel safe here; to throw caution to the wind. Many who I have shared it with are extremely supportive even when they are unable to relate to or understand it fully.
I have been asked to tell my 'member' story for the IDEA Fitness Journal. They have no idea I haven't worked professionally in 19 years. I think they may have liked one of my answers on their Facebook page and it may have caught their eye. Yet, with the questions they are asking me to answer... I am highly certain that my answers will be way out in left field (what?! another baseball analogy!). Can the world handle me... Can I handle the world. Great fear arises and hiding is a very comfortable option! lol And, I can't wait to see what I do with this...!
May you connect to who you already are (the truth of who you are) and live it easily and lovingly. Perhaps, we best honor the Universe, our Creator and ourselves in doing so. Yippee and Yikes!
I am believing and realizing more and more that I don't think I want to be who I am. I am uncomfortable with who I am. Mostly, because I tell myself that who I am is so different. I tell myself I am too soft, too sensitive, too needy. I tell myself that my life story is very unique and many, most likely, will not be able to understand me. I don't want to be called a wuss. lol
I'm also realizing that when I resist telling my truth and/or living my truth, I feel overwhelmed with confusion. I feel distraught. I feel totally unsettled. And, there is only one thing to do. Tell my story as I know it to be. Here, in the recess of a unadvertised blog, a quiet blog; a one woman blog... I have found shelter to share my truth. I have learned to feel safe here; to throw caution to the wind. Many who I have shared it with are extremely supportive even when they are unable to relate to or understand it fully.
I have been asked to tell my 'member' story for the IDEA Fitness Journal. They have no idea I haven't worked professionally in 19 years. I think they may have liked one of my answers on their Facebook page and it may have caught their eye. Yet, with the questions they are asking me to answer... I am highly certain that my answers will be way out in left field (what?! another baseball analogy!). Can the world handle me... Can I handle the world. Great fear arises and hiding is a very comfortable option! lol And, I can't wait to see what I do with this...!
May you connect to who you already are (the truth of who you are) and live it easily and lovingly. Perhaps, we best honor the Universe, our Creator and ourselves in doing so. Yippee and Yikes!
Motherhood
"HERE'S THE THING about motherhood. It exhausts you and thrills you. It kicks you in the butt, and the very next second makes you feel like a superstar. Most of all, it teaches you to be selfless. Let me rephrase that. It doesn't really teach you this. It creates a new selflessness within you, which grabs hold of your heart when you first take your child into your arms. In that profound moment of extraordinary love and discovery, your own needs and desires become secondary. Nothing is as important as the well-being of your beautiful child. You would sacrifice anything for her. Even your own life. You would do it in a heartbeat. God wouldn't need to ask twice."
From the book "The Color of Heaven" by Julianne MacLean
It is extremely interesting to me that these past few posts have played out this way. Children was not a subject I went in search of, although I feel it is most important. The books I chose to read were pretty much random. Author Daniel Gottlieb happens to be a psychologist I saw once upon a time for help with the scleroderma disease and my communication of same with loved ones. He is a family therapist; a brilliant man that is paralyzed from the chest down from a terrible automobile accident early on in his career. He has continued on to help many and do many amazing things. Sam is, apparently, his wonderful grandson. Dr. Gottlieb is the doctor who gave me the analogy of scleroderma and living with a terrorist. One never knows when 'they would strike'. A truly brilliant human.
May you trust your instinct, follow through, stay aware and love on... One never knows what brilliant things will follow.
From the book "The Color of Heaven" by Julianne MacLean
It is extremely interesting to me that these past few posts have played out this way. Children was not a subject I went in search of, although I feel it is most important. The books I chose to read were pretty much random. Author Daniel Gottlieb happens to be a psychologist I saw once upon a time for help with the scleroderma disease and my communication of same with loved ones. He is a family therapist; a brilliant man that is paralyzed from the chest down from a terrible automobile accident early on in his career. He has continued on to help many and do many amazing things. Sam is, apparently, his wonderful grandson. Dr. Gottlieb is the doctor who gave me the analogy of scleroderma and living with a terrorist. One never knows when 'they would strike'. A truly brilliant human.
May you trust your instinct, follow through, stay aware and love on... One never knows what brilliant things will follow.
Children
"On the other hand, children raised by extremely anxious parents who may be overprotective or overbearing will absorb that anxiety. the same goes for children who are raised by parents who are uninvolved. In both cases, these children worry more about the environment than about themselves. They "learn" early on that their welfare depends o a stable environment. So naturally, these children (and later adults) work very hard to make sure the environment is "just so" in order to feel stable and secure."
"We have talked over the years (and throughout the writing of this book) about raising the child you have rather than the child you want. Of course this is not always easy for parents who want to protect their child from adversity. A naturalist once said that in nature there are no rights and wrongs, only decisions and consequences. So if we work very hard to protect our children from distress, what are the consequences? We often behave that way because of our anxiety, so in the short run, we will have less anxiety. In the short run. And what happens to our children if they are protected? Plenty. If we work too hard to clear away all adversity in their path, we steal something from them. We are learning that overprotected children are more self-absorbed, less resilient, and less creative. Anxiety disorders among our children are increasing. And much of this is because of anxious parents trying to protect their children. So how can we learn to tolerate our anxiety and have faith in our children's ability to tolerate some adversity? It begins in infancy when we say "no" to our children and they cry. That's when we learn to tolerate our own discomfort in the service of good parenting. When they get older, setting limits becomes more important than ever. But parents should not become autocrats, doors should be open for discussion, and everyone's feelings should be listened to with respect before a decision is made. When our children get older and have a conflict, we should listen to them rather than tell them what to do. If we do truly listen, we can give them gentle feedback about their ideas. And then we can send them back to try to resolve their conflict, whether it is with peers or teachers. Of course, they won't always resolve their problems in a way that feels good. But typically we learn more from losing than winning. When children suffer adversity in school, failure on tests, or difficulty in relationships, this is an opportunity for them to develop their coping skills, to figure out that they can tolerate loss. This builds resilience."
From the book "The Wisdom of Sam: Observations on Life from an Uncommon Child" by Daniel Gottlieb
I believe that what we tell our children, and what they hear, will become our children's inner voice as adults... HUGE
May you guide and be open to allowing your child to live their inner knowing while speaking the truth of your own. (of course, age appropriately)
Unknown
"We have talked over the years (and throughout the writing of this book) about raising the child you have rather than the child you want. Of course this is not always easy for parents who want to protect their child from adversity. A naturalist once said that in nature there are no rights and wrongs, only decisions and consequences. So if we work very hard to protect our children from distress, what are the consequences? We often behave that way because of our anxiety, so in the short run, we will have less anxiety. In the short run. And what happens to our children if they are protected? Plenty. If we work too hard to clear away all adversity in their path, we steal something from them. We are learning that overprotected children are more self-absorbed, less resilient, and less creative. Anxiety disorders among our children are increasing. And much of this is because of anxious parents trying to protect their children. So how can we learn to tolerate our anxiety and have faith in our children's ability to tolerate some adversity? It begins in infancy when we say "no" to our children and they cry. That's when we learn to tolerate our own discomfort in the service of good parenting. When they get older, setting limits becomes more important than ever. But parents should not become autocrats, doors should be open for discussion, and everyone's feelings should be listened to with respect before a decision is made. When our children get older and have a conflict, we should listen to them rather than tell them what to do. If we do truly listen, we can give them gentle feedback about their ideas. And then we can send them back to try to resolve their conflict, whether it is with peers or teachers. Of course, they won't always resolve their problems in a way that feels good. But typically we learn more from losing than winning. When children suffer adversity in school, failure on tests, or difficulty in relationships, this is an opportunity for them to develop their coping skills, to figure out that they can tolerate loss. This builds resilience."
From the book "The Wisdom of Sam: Observations on Life from an Uncommon Child" by Daniel Gottlieb
I believe that what we tell our children, and what they hear, will become our children's inner voice as adults... HUGE
May you guide and be open to allowing your child to live their inner knowing while speaking the truth of your own. (of course, age appropriately)
Fact...
"I realized that sometimes the things you held as absolute fact weren't fact at all, and sometimes that was all right."
"Maybe today would be the day I stopped obsessing over what might have been and started focusing on what was right in front of me."
"Life moments, Nan. Snapshots of the things and emotions that matter. The now. Not what was. Not what's supposed to be. Just what is."
"Life was a journey of letting go. Life was about learning to adjust, learning to accept the disappointments, the unexpected developments, and the out-of-this-world-wonderful surprises. Life was about appreciating life--with all its flaws and quirks and challenges. Life was about embracing the everyday moments and owning whatever happened next."
From the book "Changing Lanes" by Kathleen Long
May you challenge yourself to know what is fact and what may only feel/look like fact; especially if this 'fact' is hurting you.
"Maybe today would be the day I stopped obsessing over what might have been and started focusing on what was right in front of me."
"Life moments, Nan. Snapshots of the things and emotions that matter. The now. Not what was. Not what's supposed to be. Just what is."
"Life was a journey of letting go. Life was about learning to adjust, learning to accept the disappointments, the unexpected developments, and the out-of-this-world-wonderful surprises. Life was about appreciating life--with all its flaws and quirks and challenges. Life was about embracing the everyday moments and owning whatever happened next."
From the book "Changing Lanes" by Kathleen Long
May you challenge yourself to know what is fact and what may only feel/look like fact; especially if this 'fact' is hurting you.
Around the World
I'm hearing many question their lives, themselves, their position, their strength and their path that is their current reality today.
This looking at what we, as a world, have created is somewhat disheartening and definitely scary and some is beautiful and courageous.
Most are pushing through and beyond everything that gives them discomfort.
We are an awakening world as we can connect so easily on the computer and elsewhere. What happens over 'there', happens 'here' now. It does not seem like it does not affect us like it may have felt so in the past.
Everything that happens, happens all over now. We feel the remnants if not the full effect.
It is time to do better, more kind, more true, more open and more together.
If you are feeling strange or challenged, you are not alone. No matter what you are feeling; there are others that feel the same.
Allow your feelings to lead you to your best path to the ultimate you. Only you know you like no other can. Believe in yourself. Be true and kind to yourself and others. Be gentle. Allow gentleness where there is pain. Allow love where there is darkness. Allow yourself to process what is in front of you to progress and move through with the greatest gift you could give yourself -- The gift of you being you in all your glory, pain, sorry and beauty.
I'm feeling everything recently. I'm experiencing darkness. I'm knowing sadness. I'm connecting to great beauty of and in the lives of many.
I don't know what to do with all these feelings, emotions, thoughts, and the awareness this brings to me. And, I breathe and respond as best I can as I swing my bat at the pitches that make sense for me to do so -- as I hold the bat still when I know there is not a chance to hit the ball.... so to speak. (I have no idea where this analogy came from. I've never played ball. lol)
May you respond to whatever it is that surrounds or envelops you from your deep inner knowing of love, trust, perseverance, endurance, gentleness and truth.
This looking at what we, as a world, have created is somewhat disheartening and definitely scary and some is beautiful and courageous.
Most are pushing through and beyond everything that gives them discomfort.
We are an awakening world as we can connect so easily on the computer and elsewhere. What happens over 'there', happens 'here' now. It does not seem like it does not affect us like it may have felt so in the past.
Everything that happens, happens all over now. We feel the remnants if not the full effect.
It is time to do better, more kind, more true, more open and more together.
If you are feeling strange or challenged, you are not alone. No matter what you are feeling; there are others that feel the same.
Allow your feelings to lead you to your best path to the ultimate you. Only you know you like no other can. Believe in yourself. Be true and kind to yourself and others. Be gentle. Allow gentleness where there is pain. Allow love where there is darkness. Allow yourself to process what is in front of you to progress and move through with the greatest gift you could give yourself -- The gift of you being you in all your glory, pain, sorry and beauty.
I'm feeling everything recently. I'm experiencing darkness. I'm knowing sadness. I'm connecting to great beauty of and in the lives of many.
I don't know what to do with all these feelings, emotions, thoughts, and the awareness this brings to me. And, I breathe and respond as best I can as I swing my bat at the pitches that make sense for me to do so -- as I hold the bat still when I know there is not a chance to hit the ball.... so to speak. (I have no idea where this analogy came from. I've never played ball. lol)
May you respond to whatever it is that surrounds or envelops you from your deep inner knowing of love, trust, perseverance, endurance, gentleness and truth.
Sunday, October 20, 2013
Are
"We are who we are because of who we were." Vanilla Ice
I believe that where we have been, everything we have experienced has brought us to now, the present. If one thing would have been different, we would not be the exact person we are now. I believe everything happens for us for a reason; for the overall plan of our life.
Everything is a thread in the tapestry of our life and is completed when it is all said and done. These threads help us to be as complete as possible in every moment we experience now and in the future.
I am grateful for it all. Without it all, I would not be who I am now. I would never have gone to the depth that I have. I never would have peeled so many layers off the onion of my life, perhaps. I definitely wouldn't have explored, discovered, learned and experienced much of what I am so grateful that I have done.
It was not all easy; much was very difficult. This is still the case. And, I honestly can say I feel and see beauty in just about everything that I see and experience. For this I am grateful.
May you connect to the beauty of each situation that is a part of your life and may you allow this beauty to enter into your life as much as possible. May you allow the beauty within (the truth of who you are at the depth of yourself) to be prominent with ease and love always.
I believe that where we have been, everything we have experienced has brought us to now, the present. If one thing would have been different, we would not be the exact person we are now. I believe everything happens for us for a reason; for the overall plan of our life.
Everything is a thread in the tapestry of our life and is completed when it is all said and done. These threads help us to be as complete as possible in every moment we experience now and in the future.
I am grateful for it all. Without it all, I would not be who I am now. I would never have gone to the depth that I have. I never would have peeled so many layers off the onion of my life, perhaps. I definitely wouldn't have explored, discovered, learned and experienced much of what I am so grateful that I have done.
It was not all easy; much was very difficult. This is still the case. And, I honestly can say I feel and see beauty in just about everything that I see and experience. For this I am grateful.
May you connect to the beauty of each situation that is a part of your life and may you allow this beauty to enter into your life as much as possible. May you allow the beauty within (the truth of who you are at the depth of yourself) to be prominent with ease and love always.
Saturday, October 19, 2013
Much
I just came in from a walk under the full moon. It really is brilliant, bright and beautiful. I am so grateful I am in the warm weather and my body is very happy with this.
As I walk around the apartment complex, I feel much. The dog home alone in the dark; the woman who cannot get service on her phone; the mom and child riding bikes; other dogs taking their night time walks.
I am noticing how extremely sensitive I am just now. I feel so much 'energy' and it doesn't sit too well with me. I feel sadness, sorrow, frustration, instability, strife, and what feels like 'dislocation' and uncertainty among many people including myself.
It is not easy being this 'nutty'. (yikes) It is not easy feeling so much. It is not easy thinking like I think and I know that it is a choice that I am choosing; at least allowing myself to go this path. (I think...) Is it the full moon - maybe. Is it the unsettled world in which we live - possibly. Is it my own unsettled world - definitely.
I feel many are open to doing their own lives differently going forward. Many are feeling the connection to 'life' differently than they have in the past. I am just not sure what this 'difference' looks like or even feels like other than just now in each moment.
Wonderful things are happening to all of us whether we are aware of them or not. I believe this. This awareness, questioning and openness that many are feeling; whether forced or invited, is a truly great thing. It is far from an easy thing a lot of the time.
To look at myself and see myself and be open to examining and changing life style, life thoughts and life actions... it is huge and it takes much courage and energy for me.
May you allow your love to grow and create; forgive and learn; live and strive for the life that is inside of you to be.
I believe this may be what is happening to some; it certainly is to me... Wherever you are; whatever you do - may you always let love and 'knowing' lead the way.
As I am so uncertain and confused and not liking how I feel for a big part of the day, I am also me. I know that I am creating anew and open to live the life that is for me to live... all the greatness, all the feelings, all the challenges and all the ease. I skip on.
Unknown
As I walk around the apartment complex, I feel much. The dog home alone in the dark; the woman who cannot get service on her phone; the mom and child riding bikes; other dogs taking their night time walks.
I am noticing how extremely sensitive I am just now. I feel so much 'energy' and it doesn't sit too well with me. I feel sadness, sorrow, frustration, instability, strife, and what feels like 'dislocation' and uncertainty among many people including myself.
It is not easy being this 'nutty'. (yikes) It is not easy feeling so much. It is not easy thinking like I think and I know that it is a choice that I am choosing; at least allowing myself to go this path. (I think...) Is it the full moon - maybe. Is it the unsettled world in which we live - possibly. Is it my own unsettled world - definitely.
I feel many are open to doing their own lives differently going forward. Many are feeling the connection to 'life' differently than they have in the past. I am just not sure what this 'difference' looks like or even feels like other than just now in each moment.
Wonderful things are happening to all of us whether we are aware of them or not. I believe this. This awareness, questioning and openness that many are feeling; whether forced or invited, is a truly great thing. It is far from an easy thing a lot of the time.
To look at myself and see myself and be open to examining and changing life style, life thoughts and life actions... it is huge and it takes much courage and energy for me.
May you allow your love to grow and create; forgive and learn; live and strive for the life that is inside of you to be.
I believe this may be what is happening to some; it certainly is to me... Wherever you are; whatever you do - may you always let love and 'knowing' lead the way.
As I am so uncertain and confused and not liking how I feel for a big part of the day, I am also me. I know that I am creating anew and open to live the life that is for me to live... all the greatness, all the feelings, all the challenges and all the ease. I skip on.
Friday, October 18, 2013
Sad
Sometimes, there are things in life that are just sad. This is okay. Even if it doesn't feel okay, it is.
My uncle has fallen. This is the last man left of my mother's four siblings. It is sad, he is alone; he wants to be at his home alone.
Sometimes, many times, life does not go as planned. Life goes as life will. It is up to us to stay strong, happy, comforted and as whole as possible.
Sometimes, we win; sometimes, we learn. It is okay. It is life for us all.
It does not feel like it is okay that my uncle has fallen and he wants to be alone. Who am I to give him something that he does not want even if it is I who thinks it is better for him. I will support him as best I can in making his wishes come true. If it is not up to me; do I fight it... If it is not up to him; does he...
Does fighting it make it better... Does fighting it put energy where it is unhelpful and maybe even hurtful... What if fighting it creates the best outcome... What if the outcome makes my uncle most unhappy....
Life. It is a ride. Life. It is real. Life. It is ours to decide how to feel, be, do and take in and allow flow of same.
Sometimes, life is just sad. It is okay to be sad.
May you know as much ease, love and trust as possible when you know sadness.
My uncle has fallen. This is the last man left of my mother's four siblings. It is sad, he is alone; he wants to be at his home alone.
Sometimes, many times, life does not go as planned. Life goes as life will. It is up to us to stay strong, happy, comforted and as whole as possible.
Sometimes, we win; sometimes, we learn. It is okay. It is life for us all.
It does not feel like it is okay that my uncle has fallen and he wants to be alone. Who am I to give him something that he does not want even if it is I who thinks it is better for him. I will support him as best I can in making his wishes come true. If it is not up to me; do I fight it... If it is not up to him; does he...
Does fighting it make it better... Does fighting it put energy where it is unhelpful and maybe even hurtful... What if fighting it creates the best outcome... What if the outcome makes my uncle most unhappy....
Life. It is a ride. Life. It is real. Life. It is ours to decide how to feel, be, do and take in and allow flow of same.
Sometimes, life is just sad. It is okay to be sad.
May you know as much ease, love and trust as possible when you know sadness.
Thursday, October 17, 2013
Today
Today, I am feeling an unsettled feeling pretty strongly. My daughter's horse is coming; which is great news and it will be a new adjustment for her as well as I.
I know we will be good. And, the feeling it brings up seems to highlight the many changes that I am living through just now.
I do feel the excitement of it. I do feel the fear of it. I do feel the unknown of it. I do feel the open possibilities.
I am in a 'storm' and there is no other shelter than to ride it out. The best way through is living it. I am living it as best I can.
I push and pull myself in many different directions. I love looking at homes. I do not love being in limbo waiting for the transition to take place. The transition of letting go of the past home and moving into the future home. I love the many possibilities. I do not love the uncertainty of them.
Life is a ride. Today I am not laughing. Today I am not screaming. Today I am not just being.
Today I am struggling some. I do not know where to lay my thoughts, my head. I do not know where to place my energy for I am not aware of the best road to take. I am at a detour and there are no directional signs that lead me through it.
I have to trust myself that I can and will lead myself, along with my family, through it.
We humans meet many detours throughout our lives. We, thus far, have always found our way.
May you continue to find your way and, as best you can, relax (and enjoy the journey) onto the road that feels and is best for you now today. "Follow your heart." This was the best advice my mom always repeated to me. "Follow your heart."
Our hearts will lead us forward. We cannot take a wrong path. We win or we learn. There is no reason, perhaps, to label it as losing ever again. When we learn, there is always a better way going forward that will show itself to us. Perhaps, 'losing' is staying stuck in a situation that no longer feeds our soul.
May you be open to moving on if your soul is not being fed. Please make sure you have your 'inner knowing' with you on these detours that all of us sometimes stumble upon. Listen to your heart; your inner knowing; your inner truth.
Unknown
I know we will be good. And, the feeling it brings up seems to highlight the many changes that I am living through just now.
I do feel the excitement of it. I do feel the fear of it. I do feel the unknown of it. I do feel the open possibilities.
I am in a 'storm' and there is no other shelter than to ride it out. The best way through is living it. I am living it as best I can.
I push and pull myself in many different directions. I love looking at homes. I do not love being in limbo waiting for the transition to take place. The transition of letting go of the past home and moving into the future home. I love the many possibilities. I do not love the uncertainty of them.
Life is a ride. Today I am not laughing. Today I am not screaming. Today I am not just being.
Today I am struggling some. I do not know where to lay my thoughts, my head. I do not know where to place my energy for I am not aware of the best road to take. I am at a detour and there are no directional signs that lead me through it.
I have to trust myself that I can and will lead myself, along with my family, through it.
We humans meet many detours throughout our lives. We, thus far, have always found our way.
May you continue to find your way and, as best you can, relax (and enjoy the journey) onto the road that feels and is best for you now today. "Follow your heart." This was the best advice my mom always repeated to me. "Follow your heart."
Our hearts will lead us forward. We cannot take a wrong path. We win or we learn. There is no reason, perhaps, to label it as losing ever again. When we learn, there is always a better way going forward that will show itself to us. Perhaps, 'losing' is staying stuck in a situation that no longer feeds our soul.
May you be open to moving on if your soul is not being fed. Please make sure you have your 'inner knowing' with you on these detours that all of us sometimes stumble upon. Listen to your heart; your inner knowing; your inner truth.
Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Early Morning Post
I just had the dogs out in the quiet of the morning before sunrise. Oh, how I love going outside and not feeling a chill or a discomfort because of the temperature. It is quite relaxing and easy for me. I am grateful.
I'm going to read and go back to sleep yet. Going back to sleep is always the deepest sleep I have. It is a wondrous sleep; a healing sleep; a no worries, easy sleep. I am grateful.
I, again today, am going house hunting. This gives me great happiness and hope. I feel an unexpected hesitancy and I walk through it. It's all I can do.
Feel, process and let it go. To ignore it or want it to change gives me a 'not being heard' feeling and/or anxiety. If I trust that I feel this way for a real reason, I can be aware and still use my 'thinking brain' to walk on through.
I told a friend today that if I feel confused and/or have scattered thinking, I ask myself what my goal is (as told to me by a brilliant therapist) in the moment. In the next moment, I may have a new goal and that's okay too. However, when I set my mind on a goal, I have more clarity and peace.
May I offer you to know your goal in each moment, especially if you are feeling confusion or discord. May you have clarity and peace within.
A Friend's Facebook page post WOW How lucky they are to wake up to this.
I'm going to read and go back to sleep yet. Going back to sleep is always the deepest sleep I have. It is a wondrous sleep; a healing sleep; a no worries, easy sleep. I am grateful.
I, again today, am going house hunting. This gives me great happiness and hope. I feel an unexpected hesitancy and I walk through it. It's all I can do.
Feel, process and let it go. To ignore it or want it to change gives me a 'not being heard' feeling and/or anxiety. If I trust that I feel this way for a real reason, I can be aware and still use my 'thinking brain' to walk on through.
I told a friend today that if I feel confused and/or have scattered thinking, I ask myself what my goal is (as told to me by a brilliant therapist) in the moment. In the next moment, I may have a new goal and that's okay too. However, when I set my mind on a goal, I have more clarity and peace.
May I offer you to know your goal in each moment, especially if you are feeling confusion or discord. May you have clarity and peace within.
Tuesday, October 15, 2013
My Being
My being, my person, my body oscillates with energy. My ears ring. I can feel the vibration of myself. It is loud, it is haunting, it is uncomfortable.
I feel my hands more. I feel my face more. I feel my feet more. My fingers feel more free, pliable and movable. It is like every cell of my body is engrossed or enlarged with energy vibrating in it, through it and outward.
This makes no sense to my intellect. And, every sense to my truth. Oh Boy!
I hear it said that the greatest war we may ever fight is between what we know and what we feel. I concur.
While I am highly uncomfortable in my own skin, I feel that my skin just may be happier than it has known in quite some time. Over 30 years is quite some time?!?!?!?
Oh my.... I am talking about 'happy skin'. No wonder I am dizzy and spacey. I surely do not want to talk about happy skin. Yet, I'm hesitantly excited about the chance of happy skin.... Yikes.
I'm in solitude with my animals, my phone, my computer, my self, my TV. I've talked to many people all morning long through email, texts, Facebook, telephone and dog walking....
I'm hearing some people talk about their neck and just wanting better flow to their head/brain. There is tightness in the neck that wants to be released to either allow flow, explosion, implosion or release. I feel this too.
I wonder if it is our hearts wanting to connect more to our brain and our brain wanting to connect more to our hearts. Is it this vibration that many, if not most, are feeling... this change; this shift; this higher vibration that many believe is happening to and on this entire planet (and internal/external of same).
I have no clue. Do I think it is .. yes. Do I think it feels strange and crazy.. yes. Does it feel real.. yes.
So, as I feel these pin pricks to my skin, as my ears ring loud; annoyingly so.. All I can do is be with what is, do the best I can, embrace as much as I can, change what I can and be with my truth.
To ignore negativity does not make it go away. To process it and learn from it.. This is what works for me today.
Whatever works for you..
Be that. BE what works for you in joy, love, compassion, empathy, gentleness and love. When other emotions come up, allow and acknowledge them. Sit with them in your truth or run if you have to.... Do what brings you the greatest connection to following your inner knowing. Do THIS.
THIS is what you are here to do today. You KNOW AND FEEL IT. Allow it; do it; be it.
JUST BE YOU!
I feel my hands more. I feel my face more. I feel my feet more. My fingers feel more free, pliable and movable. It is like every cell of my body is engrossed or enlarged with energy vibrating in it, through it and outward.
This makes no sense to my intellect. And, every sense to my truth. Oh Boy!
I hear it said that the greatest war we may ever fight is between what we know and what we feel. I concur.
While I am highly uncomfortable in my own skin, I feel that my skin just may be happier than it has known in quite some time. Over 30 years is quite some time?!?!?!?
Oh my.... I am talking about 'happy skin'. No wonder I am dizzy and spacey. I surely do not want to talk about happy skin. Yet, I'm hesitantly excited about the chance of happy skin.... Yikes.
I'm in solitude with my animals, my phone, my computer, my self, my TV. I've talked to many people all morning long through email, texts, Facebook, telephone and dog walking....
I'm hearing some people talk about their neck and just wanting better flow to their head/brain. There is tightness in the neck that wants to be released to either allow flow, explosion, implosion or release. I feel this too.
I wonder if it is our hearts wanting to connect more to our brain and our brain wanting to connect more to our hearts. Is it this vibration that many, if not most, are feeling... this change; this shift; this higher vibration that many believe is happening to and on this entire planet (and internal/external of same).
I have no clue. Do I think it is .. yes. Do I think it feels strange and crazy.. yes. Does it feel real.. yes.
So, as I feel these pin pricks to my skin, as my ears ring loud; annoyingly so.. All I can do is be with what is, do the best I can, embrace as much as I can, change what I can and be with my truth.
To ignore negativity does not make it go away. To process it and learn from it.. This is what works for me today.
Whatever works for you..
Be that. BE what works for you in joy, love, compassion, empathy, gentleness and love. When other emotions come up, allow and acknowledge them. Sit with them in your truth or run if you have to.... Do what brings you the greatest connection to following your inner knowing. Do THIS.
THIS is what you are here to do today. You KNOW AND FEEL IT. Allow it; do it; be it.
JUST BE YOU!
Again
Again, I sit to write and I have nothing to say or share that is compelling me to do so.
I am enjoying the beautiful walks with my dogs in the beautiful Florida sunshine with the palm trees, green grass, and quiet, gentle breeze that caresses my skin. It's exhilarating and calming for me at the same time.
There are acorns on the path which, for a few weeks now, I have been stepping on softly as they massage the bottom of my feet and toes. Today one got stuck on my flimsy sandal and stayed with me right at the bottom of my big right toe. I thanked it. lol
I am here now. I am not where I am going. I am not where I have been. I sit is the awe of my presence in the world.
It truly is the great unknown as to how we are here to BE. Some things are just not for our human brains to know or I suppose we would be given the intelligence to know. I am learning that not knowing just may be a blessing of the greatest kind. I don't know this either. For now, I am okay with not knowing what I don't know as I embrace what I can know; what I do know, feel, see, experience, process. I am okay in this very minute. I am.
So, as I start my day -- I am open to receive, give, love, wonder and let it all be okay within. THIS is the process of life. Come on day, let's live you! (okay, then!)
Happy Processing I say... Even when it doesn't feel 'happy',
May you process through as YOU and feel, experience, live as YOU. May you trust yourself to receive, give, love, wonder only as you can.
I am enjoying the beautiful walks with my dogs in the beautiful Florida sunshine with the palm trees, green grass, and quiet, gentle breeze that caresses my skin. It's exhilarating and calming for me at the same time.
There are acorns on the path which, for a few weeks now, I have been stepping on softly as they massage the bottom of my feet and toes. Today one got stuck on my flimsy sandal and stayed with me right at the bottom of my big right toe. I thanked it. lol
I am here now. I am not where I am going. I am not where I have been. I sit is the awe of my presence in the world.
It truly is the great unknown as to how we are here to BE. Some things are just not for our human brains to know or I suppose we would be given the intelligence to know. I am learning that not knowing just may be a blessing of the greatest kind. I don't know this either. For now, I am okay with not knowing what I don't know as I embrace what I can know; what I do know, feel, see, experience, process. I am okay in this very minute. I am.
So, as I start my day -- I am open to receive, give, love, wonder and let it all be okay within. THIS is the process of life. Come on day, let's live you! (okay, then!)
Happy Processing I say... Even when it doesn't feel 'happy',
May you process through as YOU and feel, experience, live as YOU. May you trust yourself to receive, give, love, wonder only as you can.
Sunday, October 13, 2013
???
I do not have constant words wanting to fly out through my fingers here on the keyboard. I pretty much have no words at the forefront of my mind that are anxious to come 'through'.
I sit in a relaxed state and I sit with my truth and I sit with a great hope that what I feel inside will be used to create and exhibit itself in the world outside of myself.
I see myself in a beautiful new home feeling safe and content. I see myself out in the world grabbing onto the lifeline that will be my connection to supporting others to live their truest essence that they are able to share by just digging deep, finding passion and truth and releasing it through their life as themselves.
As I type this, I get excited; energized. I know it is coming for me.
I feel and am reminded that when I started my fitness business, I started exercising with friends at my home. It turned into a business out in the world where I did videos for clients, advertised on the radio and went to high rises along the beach to roof tops overlooking the ocean and to schools and homes and had great fun supporting people in losing weight, firming up, feeling happier and healthier and finding their true sense of self through the gift of fitness and awareness of how they treated their bodies.
I feel this same way of the Be U business. I talk with friends, family, whoever will talk with me in creating or sharing a better, more fulfilled/more truer life from within connected to their inner knowing of themselves. The miraculous change and growth I have seen is magical and makes me so happy.
I walk on as me open to what God has planned for me. I plan from deep within trusting the process and allowing myself to speak, live and be my truth.
Again, I'm not sure exactly where I am going... And, oh, I am going.
As I feel my way, I hit walls and lose hope. I question if I'm good enough or healthy enough. I have falseness and uninvited noises threatening to not allow my insight to become reality. And, even through all of this, I know nothing will stop me. I feel it in every cell in my body that this is the direction I am destined to go.
I am open to live anew; evolve through and live on. As long as I go as ME, I have it going on! lol
May you take YOU wherever you go and let what you feel, what you think, what you know, what you dream to guide you to the destiny that is yours! Yes, I wish for you to know and breathe excitement in doing just this. One step at a time or whatever it takes! You have it in You to be the YOU, completely, that you were born to be!
The time is now to grab hold and fly with it. My wish for you.
I sit in a relaxed state and I sit with my truth and I sit with a great hope that what I feel inside will be used to create and exhibit itself in the world outside of myself.
I see myself in a beautiful new home feeling safe and content. I see myself out in the world grabbing onto the lifeline that will be my connection to supporting others to live their truest essence that they are able to share by just digging deep, finding passion and truth and releasing it through their life as themselves.
As I type this, I get excited; energized. I know it is coming for me.
I feel and am reminded that when I started my fitness business, I started exercising with friends at my home. It turned into a business out in the world where I did videos for clients, advertised on the radio and went to high rises along the beach to roof tops overlooking the ocean and to schools and homes and had great fun supporting people in losing weight, firming up, feeling happier and healthier and finding their true sense of self through the gift of fitness and awareness of how they treated their bodies.
I feel this same way of the Be U business. I talk with friends, family, whoever will talk with me in creating or sharing a better, more fulfilled/more truer life from within connected to their inner knowing of themselves. The miraculous change and growth I have seen is magical and makes me so happy.
I walk on as me open to what God has planned for me. I plan from deep within trusting the process and allowing myself to speak, live and be my truth.
Again, I'm not sure exactly where I am going... And, oh, I am going.
As I feel my way, I hit walls and lose hope. I question if I'm good enough or healthy enough. I have falseness and uninvited noises threatening to not allow my insight to become reality. And, even through all of this, I know nothing will stop me. I feel it in every cell in my body that this is the direction I am destined to go.
I am open to live anew; evolve through and live on. As long as I go as ME, I have it going on! lol
May you take YOU wherever you go and let what you feel, what you think, what you know, what you dream to guide you to the destiny that is yours! Yes, I wish for you to know and breathe excitement in doing just this. One step at a time or whatever it takes! You have it in You to be the YOU, completely, that you were born to be!
The time is now to grab hold and fly with it. My wish for you.
I Am Me
Ive been laying awake here in bed since 5 am. It has been almost 4 hours. It is Sunday morning. it has felt like a few minutes.
I realized just now
just be me Just Be Me JUST BE ME
I feel heat and warmth and fullness enter my hands. My feet. Just now
realizing i need same in my face.
All we ever have to do.. The best thing to always do..
Just Be Me.
I don't know if this changes anything or everything. (or something in between)
But. I get it. I hear it. I breathe it. I welcome it.
i am me. I Am Me. I AM ME.
Glorious God given me!!!!!!!!
Wherever I am. i am me.
Wherever I am. There I am.
I am a spirit, a fire, an angel, a light, a challenged human being. Only thing
that matters most as I live the rest of my days walking this planet. I AM ME.
woo freakin hoo.
(excerpt from a letter I wrote my husband this morning)
May you hear what your 'self' is wanting you to know, live, breathe and do. May you be your 'selfness'.
I realized just now
just be me Just Be Me JUST BE ME
I feel heat and warmth and fullness enter my hands. My feet. Just now
realizing i need same in my face.
All we ever have to do.. The best thing to always do..
Just Be Me.
I don't know if this changes anything or everything. (or something in between)
But. I get it. I hear it. I breathe it. I welcome it.
i am me. I Am Me. I AM ME.
Glorious God given me!!!!!!!!
Wherever I am. i am me.
Wherever I am. There I am.
I am a spirit, a fire, an angel, a light, a challenged human being. Only thing
that matters most as I live the rest of my days walking this planet. I AM ME.
woo freakin hoo.
(excerpt from a letter I wrote my husband this morning)
May you hear what your 'self' is wanting you to know, live, breathe and do. May you be your 'selfness'.
Saturday, October 12, 2013
Persevere
Life is sometimes about persevering the storms. As the quote says life is about knowing how to dance in the rain.
Sometimes, I find it easy to dance no matter what. Other times, it feels better to hunker down and weather the storm. Other times, it feels riding it out sheltered and grabbing onto what I can is the way to go.
We all have 'storms' in our life. We've all experienced them in the best way we knew how in the moment.
I read another quote recently that said 'in life, sometimes we win-- and sometimes we learn'. I liked this. I immediately thought now this is a 'no lose' life! We win; we learn. This sounds and feels more true and happier to think of life this way.
While I feel like I am losing and have lost much; I also feel like I've hugely won and have much. I would gander to believe that both are true for me and that both are true for you. And, I am 100% certain that in my 'loss', I have learned greatly.
May you win and learn and accept both with great pride and love of self.
Sometimes, I find it easy to dance no matter what. Other times, it feels better to hunker down and weather the storm. Other times, it feels riding it out sheltered and grabbing onto what I can is the way to go.
We all have 'storms' in our life. We've all experienced them in the best way we knew how in the moment.
I read another quote recently that said 'in life, sometimes we win-- and sometimes we learn'. I liked this. I immediately thought now this is a 'no lose' life! We win; we learn. This sounds and feels more true and happier to think of life this way.
While I feel like I am losing and have lost much; I also feel like I've hugely won and have much. I would gander to believe that both are true for me and that both are true for you. And, I am 100% certain that in my 'loss', I have learned greatly.
May you win and learn and accept both with great pride and love of self.
Home
While I am learning where my true home really is... inside of myself; I would like a material home for my human form.. Ha. lol
I am going out on the search of my options today. I am excited. I am hesitant. I search on.
May you continue to search and achieve your 'peace in the chaos'. Let your peace shine and support others to do the same.
Enjoy your 'home' within and without.
I know gratitude for all that is in my life. I only hope I 'survive' it! Yikes.
My last empty Florida home
I am going out on the search of my options today. I am excited. I am hesitant. I search on.
May you continue to search and achieve your 'peace in the chaos'. Let your peace shine and support others to do the same.
Enjoy your 'home' within and without.
I know gratitude for all that is in my life. I only hope I 'survive' it! Yikes.
Thursday, October 10, 2013
The World
"We are the World" I remember this song with Michael Jackson having much involvement. We really are the World.
However, I am getting off track somewhat. I have been deeply rooted and connected to all that is around me as what I know as 'my world'. It is not feeling like fun or having the time of my life. It is feeling very real, challenging, rewarding and all-encompassing.
I went to "The Alchemical Tarot" book by Rosemary Ellen Guiley ad Robert M. Place for the 'fun' of it. These are the three cards I picked from the deck and their meanings as represented in the previously mentioned book.
Knight of Swords
"Tarot Wisdom: You exhibit positive thinking and bravery, and take action to end your troubles. This card points to decisiveness - you know what you are doing. On the other hand, it might mean you are impetuous, someone who knows only how to confront things head-on, regardless of the wisdom of your deeds. Remember that a hero is measured by the villainy of his foe. The slaying here reminds you that extreme action is only called for in extreme circumstances."
Temperance
"Tarot Wisdom: Temperance represents the continual process of life. The key meaning of the card is renewal, a balancing of dual forces, and a achievement of harmony that lies beyond conscious control but simply is. Temperance is mistress of nature ad its rhythms, and perfection is her goal. She is calm and centred, and maintains her steady rhythm in the face of storms and upheavals. Temperance reminds us that there is a higher order, a higher functioning, to all that happens. We can tune into this higher consciousness by simply concentrating on the present moment, letting go of preconceptions based on the past and not holding expectations for the future.
Temperance is also related to the word 'temper' which means to make strong. Temperance can help our fortitude."
The World
"Tarot Wisdom: The World is the achievement and culmination of our goals. On the highest level it is the merging of our individual personality with the Anima Mundi, the soul of the world. The Anima Mundi strains the ability of words to describe it, and it can seem paradoxical. To the Neoplatonic philosopher it is the highest form of the divine presence that we can comprehend. It is a the centre and the circumference of being. It is outside space and time, and yet here now. It is composed of neither matter nor energy, but is the mother of both, continually creating the universe. It is the intelligent, compassionate guide that is evident in the evolution of life. It is both masculine and feminine. Though dual-sexed, we call it 'she'.
The Anima Mundi has been with us guiding us throughout the journey; we could not be alive unless this was so. She was with us when we were the Fool in the beginning. We are still that same fool now; the only difference is that we have dropped our blindfold and have become conscious of her for the first time. Now we are aware of the infinite creative potential that was here all the time. This knowledge is bliss."
May you be your truest of self from your infinite essence and believe in your connection; your importance; and be aware of the ripple of YOU in our world. May you 'ripple' as authentically as you are able. You matter to our World simply because you are....
However, I am getting off track somewhat. I have been deeply rooted and connected to all that is around me as what I know as 'my world'. It is not feeling like fun or having the time of my life. It is feeling very real, challenging, rewarding and all-encompassing.
I went to "The Alchemical Tarot" book by Rosemary Ellen Guiley ad Robert M. Place for the 'fun' of it. These are the three cards I picked from the deck and their meanings as represented in the previously mentioned book.
Knight of Swords
"Tarot Wisdom: You exhibit positive thinking and bravery, and take action to end your troubles. This card points to decisiveness - you know what you are doing. On the other hand, it might mean you are impetuous, someone who knows only how to confront things head-on, regardless of the wisdom of your deeds. Remember that a hero is measured by the villainy of his foe. The slaying here reminds you that extreme action is only called for in extreme circumstances."
Temperance
"Tarot Wisdom: Temperance represents the continual process of life. The key meaning of the card is renewal, a balancing of dual forces, and a achievement of harmony that lies beyond conscious control but simply is. Temperance is mistress of nature ad its rhythms, and perfection is her goal. She is calm and centred, and maintains her steady rhythm in the face of storms and upheavals. Temperance reminds us that there is a higher order, a higher functioning, to all that happens. We can tune into this higher consciousness by simply concentrating on the present moment, letting go of preconceptions based on the past and not holding expectations for the future.
Temperance is also related to the word 'temper' which means to make strong. Temperance can help our fortitude."
The World
"Tarot Wisdom: The World is the achievement and culmination of our goals. On the highest level it is the merging of our individual personality with the Anima Mundi, the soul of the world. The Anima Mundi strains the ability of words to describe it, and it can seem paradoxical. To the Neoplatonic philosopher it is the highest form of the divine presence that we can comprehend. It is a the centre and the circumference of being. It is outside space and time, and yet here now. It is composed of neither matter nor energy, but is the mother of both, continually creating the universe. It is the intelligent, compassionate guide that is evident in the evolution of life. It is both masculine and feminine. Though dual-sexed, we call it 'she'.
The Anima Mundi has been with us guiding us throughout the journey; we could not be alive unless this was so. She was with us when we were the Fool in the beginning. We are still that same fool now; the only difference is that we have dropped our blindfold and have become conscious of her for the first time. Now we are aware of the infinite creative potential that was here all the time. This knowledge is bliss."
May you be your truest of self from your infinite essence and believe in your connection; your importance; and be aware of the ripple of YOU in our world. May you 'ripple' as authentically as you are able. You matter to our World simply because you are....
Path
"I believe I am on a path that I am supposed to experience. I try to move one step at a time and deal with what comes at me. I learn every day. I fail every day. I succeed and overcome every day. I've been on a stony, jagged and uphill path for many years. I look forward to the day it both flattens out and smooths out, but until then, I shall endure." Scott Ungerer
Beautiful. I am blessed to call him my husband.
Beautiful. I am blessed to call him my husband.
Happy
While walking my dogs this morning in a gorgeous breeze full of sunshine, I realized that I was feeling very happy by just being aware of the sun and the breeze on my skin and my happy dogs walking beside me.
I realized that I did this 'right' for me. Living in the sunshine and warmth... it is right for me.
I realized I was grateful and I thanked myself for creating this for myself.
May you know what in your life makes you happy and thank yourself for the good job of putting yourself there.
Unknown Facebook
I realized that I did this 'right' for me. Living in the sunshine and warmth... it is right for me.
I realized I was grateful and I thanked myself for creating this for myself.
May you know what in your life makes you happy and thank yourself for the good job of putting yourself there.
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
unHappy
There is so much emotion around breaking down our home and knowing what to do with the 'stuff'. It is not a happy time. It feels downright unhappy as much as I don't want it to feel this way. (Accept what is, right...)
With each piece of furniture, each decoration, each plant, each different type of plate.... comes a memory; a human connection.
While my brain knows that I am not letting go or changing the memory, my body feels different, my mind feels different, my thoughts tell me differently. I feel the memory and it wants me to hold on... Some would say ego. Some may be right.
I am learning to embrace the memory, keep it in my being under the 'happy file' and breathe through it as I let go of the material component of same.
It is a Process. When I was creating, building, joyfully contemplating and envisioning what was going to be - my mind did not go to the breakdown of it, the loss of it, the heartache of it. I suppose this is a great thing. I knew nothing but joy and love of hard work; great hope and gratitude.
I know different today. I know pain and sorry, hardship and loss. The gratitude is still alive. The joy of it is still with me. It is met with opposition as well now. This is the human dynamic I suppose.
So, I walk through, destroying lovingly and not so lovingly and breakdown what was.
Just because something works so well for us in the past, does not mean it will always continue to be so.
Breathe in the now and see, feel and be what is working for me in the present and, perhaps, going forward. I will not get stuck (I hope) in 'it always worked for me before' mode. I am grateful how well 'it' worked for me. I am open to whatever works as well for me now.
May you notice what 'mode' you are working from and allow yourself to be in the what works best for me today and going forward mode. Perhaps, we win if we rock our world today. This moment is truly the only one we are certain that we have made it to....
May you feel and love yourself as you let you be you in this moment right now. May you experience it as you best like.
With each piece of furniture, each decoration, each plant, each different type of plate.... comes a memory; a human connection.
While my brain knows that I am not letting go or changing the memory, my body feels different, my mind feels different, my thoughts tell me differently. I feel the memory and it wants me to hold on... Some would say ego. Some may be right.
I am learning to embrace the memory, keep it in my being under the 'happy file' and breathe through it as I let go of the material component of same.
It is a Process. When I was creating, building, joyfully contemplating and envisioning what was going to be - my mind did not go to the breakdown of it, the loss of it, the heartache of it. I suppose this is a great thing. I knew nothing but joy and love of hard work; great hope and gratitude.
I know different today. I know pain and sorry, hardship and loss. The gratitude is still alive. The joy of it is still with me. It is met with opposition as well now. This is the human dynamic I suppose.
So, I walk through, destroying lovingly and not so lovingly and breakdown what was.
Just because something works so well for us in the past, does not mean it will always continue to be so.
Breathe in the now and see, feel and be what is working for me in the present and, perhaps, going forward. I will not get stuck (I hope) in 'it always worked for me before' mode. I am grateful how well 'it' worked for me. I am open to whatever works as well for me now.
May you notice what 'mode' you are working from and allow yourself to be in the what works best for me today and going forward mode. Perhaps, we win if we rock our world today. This moment is truly the only one we are certain that we have made it to....
May you feel and love yourself as you let you be you in this moment right now. May you experience it as you best like.
Unknown/Facebook
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
Hard to Breathe
While I am speaking my truth, sharing my full self, honoring what is as best as I can in each moment, I am not comfortable and I'm pretty certain not many around me are either. It feels like a very eye opening, albeit, confusing time to me.
I shake with the change from honoring others first to honoring myself first.
I love this idea -- be the essence you were born to be. I'm seeing this almost everywhere I look. It is so exciting!!! Hugely so
I believe we are ready to be all that we are together. No more hiding what we were 'taught' or 'decided' to turn off about ourselves that scare or frighten us.
What we know at the depth of ourselves needs to be at the forefront of our life. This completes the 'puzzle' of living. This completes each one of us in this world now at this time together. It is, perhaps, what we are here to learn. Woo Hoo -- we are learning just this!
JUST BE U - YOU Y O U. Do it today, this minute, this second. Always.
Breathe you up and out of yourself and into our world. We are ready and I believe more and more of us have nowhere left to hide... We have to breathe ourselves up and out into the world.
It is so unknown and so exciting. huge Yikes.
May you open up to allow all of yourself to live any and/or all of the 'unlived life' you still have inside of you.
Office building in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida, USA
I shake with the change from honoring others first to honoring myself first.
I love this idea -- be the essence you were born to be. I'm seeing this almost everywhere I look. It is so exciting!!! Hugely so
I believe we are ready to be all that we are together. No more hiding what we were 'taught' or 'decided' to turn off about ourselves that scare or frighten us.
What we know at the depth of ourselves needs to be at the forefront of our life. This completes the 'puzzle' of living. This completes each one of us in this world now at this time together. It is, perhaps, what we are here to learn. Woo Hoo -- we are learning just this!
JUST BE U - YOU Y O U. Do it today, this minute, this second. Always.
Breathe you up and out of yourself and into our world. We are ready and I believe more and more of us have nowhere left to hide... We have to breathe ourselves up and out into the world.
It is so unknown and so exciting. huge Yikes.
May you open up to allow all of yourself to live any and/or all of the 'unlived life' you still have inside of you.
Sunday, October 6, 2013
May
May you allow yourself to believe that what is in your heart and from your deepest of inner knowing that 'it' is yours to live.
Feel your way to live your "unlived life" (Steven Preston) with everything that you know, everything that you have, everything that you are and everything that you can imagine and/or dream up...
May you believe that anything is possible. When there is nothing else, you always have your breath. From your breath, anything truly is create-able.
-----
I am with the 'knowing' that there were a lot of people in what once was my beautiful Shambala; my home that I loved. The home that was created from love and with the thought of healing, giving and sharing.
It was our first official Open House to offer it for sale. I was told that people came and did not want to leave.
I replied that I understand this feeling for myself. And, this was what most people experienced when they came to Shambala. Contractors would come to work and they would leave jackets, tools and items there by accident. People would come to visit and stay an extra day. People would come to heal from surgery or 'storms' and they would stay until life allowed them to go back to their own lives. People would come for a holiday or a party and the togetherness that this house allowed and supported will be unmatched anywhere else. It was a world within the world. And, I will be forever grateful to have known this.
And, giving this up feels like giving a piece of my soul's sanctuary up. And, I have learned through all of this, that my soul and my home is wherever I am. When I stay open to this truth, I meet people, I feel love and I know this as truth. My soul is still very much here with me.
My wish is for you to live your life the way that feels best, right, happy, loving, fulfilling to you.
I read recently... "...If you are a fairy, be a fairy. If you are a mermaid, be a mermaid. If you are an angel, be the angel that you are. What frees your soul to be you... is YOUR TRUTH...." Rouinna Borromeo Sypher-Crocco
If you know what you are, be that! Be the person that you are from the depth of your most inner 'crazy' wisdom. And, if you are not quite sure... be this also.
Live your truth and give it light and a voice. Woo Hoo. The time has come. The time is now. Your time to live all of your truth out loud is now.
May you live YOU out loud.
Unknown
Feel your way to live your "unlived life" (Steven Preston) with everything that you know, everything that you have, everything that you are and everything that you can imagine and/or dream up...
May you believe that anything is possible. When there is nothing else, you always have your breath. From your breath, anything truly is create-able.
-----
I am with the 'knowing' that there were a lot of people in what once was my beautiful Shambala; my home that I loved. The home that was created from love and with the thought of healing, giving and sharing.
It was our first official Open House to offer it for sale. I was told that people came and did not want to leave.
I replied that I understand this feeling for myself. And, this was what most people experienced when they came to Shambala. Contractors would come to work and they would leave jackets, tools and items there by accident. People would come to visit and stay an extra day. People would come to heal from surgery or 'storms' and they would stay until life allowed them to go back to their own lives. People would come for a holiday or a party and the togetherness that this house allowed and supported will be unmatched anywhere else. It was a world within the world. And, I will be forever grateful to have known this.
And, giving this up feels like giving a piece of my soul's sanctuary up. And, I have learned through all of this, that my soul and my home is wherever I am. When I stay open to this truth, I meet people, I feel love and I know this as truth. My soul is still very much here with me.
My wish is for you to live your life the way that feels best, right, happy, loving, fulfilling to you.
I read recently... "...If you are a fairy, be a fairy. If you are a mermaid, be a mermaid. If you are an angel, be the angel that you are. What frees your soul to be you... is YOUR TRUTH...." Rouinna Borromeo Sypher-Crocco
If you know what you are, be that! Be the person that you are from the depth of your most inner 'crazy' wisdom. And, if you are not quite sure... be this also.
Live your truth and give it light and a voice. Woo Hoo. The time has come. The time is now. Your time to live all of your truth out loud is now.
May you live YOU out loud.
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