Write a Letter

I'd like to make a suggestion to sit down and write a letter.  A letter to a deceased person, a person you haven't seen in a long time; a person you'd like to feel a connection to.  I believe a letter can be written to a part of your body, to yourself as a child, to a disease to whatever feels right for you.

Write the letter like you are not going to send it and no one else is going to see it.  Write it without sensors.  Just sit and let words/thoughts/feelings flow.

Just a suggestion.

If you want to then send it to someone - it is completely your choice.  You can burn it afterwards. It is up to you what you do with it.

Whatever works for you to Be U!

Good luck.  My goal is peace within.

Just Letting It All Be

Worrying about things getting done; worrying about changes that have to be incorporated around the home or elsewhere does not help me get things done any easier or faster.  In fact, worrying doesn't help at all.

Whether I worry or not, things will get done or they will sit in wait. 

Today, I am choosing to let go of the worry and Just Be.  Whatever is - is.  I'm ok. 

In this very moment; in this space in time - I am okay.

All is right in my world.

How are you choosing to handle what is in your world in this moment?  Is it time to fight or is it time to Just Be.  What feels better; fighting or just letting it all be? 

To My Daughter

I just saw your website that you linked me with and I read every word, looked at every picture and played every video.  My heart never felt bigger.  I don't think my heartbeat has ever been so loud.

I am in awe and I fell in love with you all over again; you as a young adult.  I couldn't be more proud, more awestruck, and am so happy you are sharing your amazing beauty with the world.  You rock.  Your beauty and brilliance are endless.

I have never felt more lucky and honored to know you.  To be able to say that I am your mother, just may be the most precious, valuable, most wondrous 'thing' I have ever felt.

You, my daughter, have the beauty of nature within you.  It has never been more prevalent to me then after seeing what is really going on inside and around you.

Thank you for letting me in.  It is, by far, the greatest gift a mom could get.

Love you More,   Mom

-------------------------------------


Have you told your loved ones how much they mean to you lately? 

Are they the greatest connection we can receive; the only connection that can take us to the depth of ourselves.  Is it possible they are partly everything to who we are.  

I am seeing, feeling and knowing that the people closest to me can help teach me to see my lowest lows and my highest highs and everything in between. They help take me to places inside of me and help me to learn and grow and discover levels of myself that I wouldn't have found otherwise. 

What a Great Day to Be Alive

I hope your day is full of excitement, adventure, and peace as you share the real YOU with your world.  How lucky the world is to have you in it!

Whatever you are feeling is okay.  Accept it for this moment and, perhaps, know that you are exactly where you need to be on your journey through your life.

May light and beauty surround you and flow through you today.

Dare we connect with the part of us that has a full zest for living and love and project that out into our world today?  See what happens...

I am grateful for you and the connection you give me.  Thank you for showing up on my blog.

Whatever It is You Need

Is it possible that wherever your mind is, allow it, and just be u.

What is Best

Do I know what is best for my family?  Do I know what is best for my friends?  Is it possible that no one knows what is best for anyone other than themselves.

Is it possible that sometimes we are contemplating what everyone else needs, we forget our own.  Is it possible that if I just let all others say what is best for them and trust that they are able to deal with good or bad consequences of their decisions (that this is their path of life and growing), that I can be more focused on what is good for me.

I'm living this way lately and, very surprisingly, I see that to live my own truth allows others to live theirs and there is so much more peace in my world.  I am starting to learn (for me) that giving and shouldering and taking away 'things'  from others; thinking I am doing what is best for them; can create disharmony and imbalance.

I am surprised when I let go and live my life (ask what is best for me in this moment), others are forced to be real and grow and find their own strength to fully live.  It is a beautiful thing and I believe it is the way that works best for the world.

When I shelter or protect my loved ones from what I believe may hurt or be difficult for them, am I being untrue to living.  Am I creating more disharmony. 

I believe the harmony that is created by me trusting they are able and capable of taking on all things in their own life, it's like I'm watching a beautiful masterpiece being made. 

We all live with the good, the bad and the ugly.  We all have our own strengths and weaknesses.  This is what makes us unique.

Being unique is what (I believe) was intended for each and everyone of us.  We work better together when we are real about our individualness.

When we live our true identity, we have so very much to 'bring to the table'.  

My wish for today is that we all bask in our uniqueness and allow it to grow with love.  We let go of painting another person's life and watch the beauty that unfolds.

When Fear Knocks

I've heard the saying 'when fear knocks at your door; open the door and no one will be there.' 

When fear knocks at my door - when I am brave enough to open the door (go through the fear - do whatever it is I fear anyway)  nothing is there.  The fear dissipates almost, if not, completely. 

When I walk through the fear, fear is no longer prevalent or controlling me.  It seems the thought of something is where the fear resides.  In the actual doing of something, fear loses its power.

Even the thought of doing things I don't really want to do; the thought is almost always worse than the actual doing.  The energy I spend on thinking about doing or having something done is really not worth the energy.

Just like writing this post.  It's taking me a while; it's taking extra energy because I still have a hard time admitting how I'm truly feeling at times.  So, let's let that go and see where I end up.

So, when the thought of walking my dog in the cold or having to clean up after people within their schedule or deal with too many contractors, or having to organize my in bin; when I spend time thinking about how I don't want to do this; the burden of it gets heavier and heavier on me.   But, if I just let go and do them, actually doing them is not quite as bad as I thought it would be (majority of the time anyway).

When I have a fear of leaving my sick dog alone or my daughter alone at home (Oh my, what if she needs me to help her with something as serious as getting her a bottle of water), --stay-at-home mom don't forget-- if I just get in my car and drive; I'm okay.  It's amazing how once I am in the car - it's super easy.  I KNOW that my dog is fine for a period of time.  I KNOW my daughter can get her own bottle of water.  However, that transition between knowing I'm going to leave and walking out the door - there is a fight within me.  A should I - shouldn't I battle.  Oh my, I'm still using that 'should' word. 

When I ask myself what is going to make me most happy and I do that - all is good.  When I worry about the dog or my daughter or anything other than my happy - OH CAN I FIND THE TURMOIL WITHIN.  

I vow to keep going after my 'happy'.  I think we were all born with our 'happy' intact.  I think that maybe I was trained or coerced or guilted into losing that 'happy' on different levels and being and doing what others around me requested or needed me to do.  We somewhat lose our 'happy'. 

Why am I spending my energy on the fear or discomfort I'm telling myself I'll feel by doing these things.  When, most of the time, when I just do it - it's not really a big deal.

Good question.  No answer.  Sit with it for a while, I suppose!   Could this be why alot of us keep going and don't stop to feel or check in with ourselves.  It can be an unsettling place.  I'm somewhat unsettled right now!

Anything about the thought of fear and the actual doing something resonating with you?  If we all jumped out of an airplane, would this change the world?  ha.

Something I'd Like to Share with You that I Think is Really Cool

The same morning I made the post on Mantras Getting Us Over the Rainbow, this rainbow was in the sky that afternoon.  Very cool.

Is it a sign that I'm following my heart better; is it a coincidence.  I am feeling like I was aligned with the Universe at that moment.  I believe this is what I mean by peace in the chaos.  It was awesome and fun for me.  I needed to share.

I believe if we look for signs - they are everywhere.

Proof is in the rainbow.?!

Are you open to looking for signs; coincidences; and/or alignments in your life?

Mantras that May Help Get Us Over the Rainbow

I trust the process of life and I am enthused and encouraged that I handle each day with grace and love.

I trust that all things are as they need to be and I will be okay.

I am so happy that I am living my life and not someone elses.

I survived everything that life has thrown at me so far and that's how I roll.

Everything always works out in the end.

I am grateful for all the good in my life.

For today, I can let go of anything that doesn't need my attention now.

                    What mantra do you want to come up with that works for you?

On To Something

I am feeling like I am really on to something now.  I feel so close to the real me; the inner me.  I am so close, I am shaking.

With writing this blog, I am seeing and knowing the real me more than I have ever.  It's probably the hardest thing for me to do - look at the real me.  Get connected and start anew with the real me.

I have let so many things just happen and go by without participating and trusting myself and voicing my 'inner-ness'. 

Not so much these days.   I feel and state and show what is really going on within and my world around me is going crazy.  Constantly changing and constantly feeling the extremes of many emotions.  Many 'freak' episodes and many 'WOW episodes.

I will continue on.  I'd love to bring you all with me to connecting to your inner knowing, your ability to follow your 'happy'. 

We can all live our own power and light and make the world a happier, more synchronized place of peace and togetherness. 

Sounds good to me.

What is your inner knowing and your 'happy' wanting you to do right now?  What if that is what our lesson is here on earth.--  To reveal our true essence while inside our human form?  What a concept!

Your Wish

What can you dream today that you hope to have tomorrow?

Always Light in the Darkness

I realized that, no matter what, there is always a glimmer (or more) of light in the darkness.  Always, always something to grab onto and move out of the dark.

What do you choose to be your light today?  Feel it, allow it,  know it, follow it.

Raising Children

When I asked a psychologist why we don't teach knowing oneself in school to our children, he said he's been wanting to for years, but the greatest resistance comes from the parents.

If we teach our kids to think for themselves and go within and follow their 'knowing', then parents lose control and alot of us as parents do not like this and are very uncomfortable with this.

I do understand that when my child wants to do things differently than what I know; differently than what I am comfortable with - it does become a challenge to allow it.  However, just because it's not comfortable for me and it's not what I would do or even like; doesn't mean it's not loving and right for my child.

I am trying to allow freedom for my child to grow and become their own person.  As long as I see them grow in the direction of  love, kindness, and doing their best with most things they do, I wonder if this is enough.  I wonder if this is the best way to parent a child to become a loving, responsible, and happy adult.

I want my child to be an adult who is confident, considerate, and follows their inner knowing without much question.   If I don't let them get in touch with their inner knowing as a child so I can be comfortable; how do I expect them to follow it and know it as an adult.

I vow to let my child live their life and follow their heart while I give advice, guidance and opinions and try not to hold them back to/with their dreams just because I don't understand them or they are so different from what I know. 

This is a whole new life challenge for us mere humans. 

How do you want to watch and participate in your child's growth and inner knowing/love of themselves so they can fully use their individual power to contribute to society as an adult? 

You Know You Got it if it Makes You Feel Good

You know you are on one of your happy paths, if you feel good within.  If you are not feeling it, allow what you feel lovingly, and work to get on your 'happy'. 

When we are on our 'happy', it positively affects the world and all of us.  Emotions trickle out of us and around us.   I am choosing today to trickle happy!

May you feel good within today.  Can you choose this for yourself today?  If not all day, then a portion of it?

In My Heart

When I am in my heart, I know exactly what I need, what I want, what makes me happy.  It's bringing that 'knowing' to the outside world; outside of myself, that I am having a huge problem with.  I do not know how.  I've told myself this probably 20 years ago, as I am telling myself this now.

I've gotten better at it.  There is much I can now put out there without fear or questioning.  There is some 'junk' still holding on deep within that I am trying to 'know' how to just do or just be with.

Fear is the only thing stopping me.  Fear and probably shame.  Yet, it's not my shame.  Or is it?  Is it 'fake' shame?  Is it something I bought into or allowed to grow deep inside of me because of secrets that my childhood family kept.  Things I wasn't allowed to tell.  Yes, I think it is. 

When even a smidgen of this feeling comes up for me - it's huge for me.  I want to run.  I want to hide.  I get physically sick. 

Okay, so as an adult, I am much better at knowing what is right for me.  I have many more 'tools' and abilities to deal with any situation.

So, today, I am going to use my tools; use my ability and do what my 'knowing' tells me to do.   I will choose courage over fear, myself over everything.  Be my power and be the person I was put on this earth to be.

Life goes on......

Whether we are on our happy paths or take a wrong turn, life goes on.  What path do you want to travel today? 

My wish for you is to stay on your happy path as much as possible; when you stray from any of your happy paths, and we all do, that there will be good learning from taking the wrong path.

When a Woman

When a Woman doesn't know what to do, what is she supposed to do?  Tell a funny.


The candy at the movie theatre is so expensive because they keep raisinette. 


LOL - sort of? 

Metabolism

Keeping our metabolism on is important to burning calories and staying a healthy weight.  Burning body fat and calories with simple everyday gestures is a kind and loving thing to do for oneself.

Parking further in a parking lot from the front door; taking the steps instead of the escalator/elevator; lifting weights and adding muscle to our body (muscle burns more calories than fat); eating smaller, more frequent meals are all good ways to keep our bodies burning calories.  When we do not eat for a long period of time, out metabolism slows down to conserve energy; hence burning less calories.

After we exercise, our bodies still burn more calories during the period after exercise then if we didn't exercise at all.

I'm going to try today to keep my metabolism up and burning.

Metabolism - the physical and chemical process in our bodies for which energy is made available.

Is your metabolism happy?

Fear or Courage

I've been focusing on fear a bit too much these days.  So, today, I'm going to focus on my courage and see how different the day may be.

"They" say what we focus on, grows.  So, today, I'm going to get in touch with my courage, watch it and help it to grow.

I've been somewhat focused on my fear and my lack of ability and not hitting a goal fast enough; and I am stressed and anxious.  So, today, calmly, I am going to watch my courage of dealing with not being able; dealing with doing things even though I'm afraid to; and working through challenges that I think are too much to take on.  I'm afraid just thinking about it!

We all have courage.  I'd like to pat each one of you on your back for all your accomplishments and challenges that you have achieved and gotten through.  We can be awesome, can't we?

How much of your awesomeness are you willing to tap into today?

Thankful

Hip Hip Hooray!  I loved and I learned today! 

How lucky is that?

My wish for you is the same.

What's a Person to Do?

Well, the cooler weather is setting in for sure and I am feeling it and suffering a bit.  It creates some pain for me and I am unhappy about it.  More than unhappy.

Moreover, I don't know what is okay to write and say.  I don't want to embarrass my family and/or friends.  I don't want to make readers uncomfortable with the truth of my discomfort.

I am uncomfortable sharing the reality of my 'fight' against pain and this disease.

The scleroderma is causing my hands to turn purple and numb and violently painful.  The discoloration has also been labeled Raynauds Phenomenom.  It's hard for me to type today.

I do notice when I least want to talk about my feelings and life situation to someone (and even look at it myself) is when (if I do face it) I get the most progress on my growth towards enlightenment or being at ease with what is.  The more 'sick' I feel before I go to an appointment to talk about myself, the more I learn about myself.  I've learned, over time, to get excited when I am feeling very apprehensive before an appointment: and I do mean over time; lots of  over time!

It is not easy being brave and facing what I feel and don't want to feel.   However, the other side of it is ALWAYS better for me.

So, after my appt. this morning, I feel better.  The appointment was not easy.  I cried; I even screamed.  I am better for it at this moment.

Feel like crying or screaming?  Go ahead.  Scream while you are driving alone.  Go in and hit and kick the pillows and bed.  See if it does anything for you.  I hope it does. 

Holding on and/or burying strong emotions in our bodies can cause dis-ease.

WEIRD

I woke up this morning and it's a dark, rainy morning. Wet leaves all over the place.  AND I feel okay!  Wow.  What's up with that?  It doesn't matter I suppose.  I'm grateful.

I read an email that said Be as Weird As You Can Today.   So, that's what I am going to try to do.  At least some part of the day.

Anyone want to join me?  Great to Be Weird Day!  Go for it.  Do you dare?  Just do one thing lovingly 'weird' and fun; pretty please.  Try it, you might like it.

Not liking the way you feel....

If you are not liking the way you feel, wait a bit, it will change.  Smile, chemicals are released in the body that make us feel better when we smile.

Take a walk in nature.  Connect with nature.  Feel your connection to Mother Earth and all living things.  Breathe in the fresh air.  Listen to the sound of the running water.  Watch the birds fly overhead.  Feel the breeze on your skin or the chill in the air.

Remember a time and a place that you loved.  Remember the feeling you had.  Think of who you were when you there.  Feel the power of the moment.

You are the boss of your life.  You can make it into whatever you can dream.  If you can dream it, you can become it.

Go inside yourself.  What is it that you need right now in the moment?  Is this true?  How do you feel when you think this thought?  If it feels good, it's the right thought.  If it doesn't, is it okay to change it for just this moment?  Take this one moment for you.  You deserve it.  SMILE.

Range of Emotions

I know it is probably best to feel all the emotions; the range of them.  However, I am not having too much fun feeling the darker ones like fear, dread, unhappiness.   I am thinking that without feeling these, I may not be able to know the opposite emotions like braveness, excitement and happiness.

Today is my day for the darkness.  I woke up into it.  Wanting it to change is all I can think about.  Trying to get my head around it and, perhaps through it.  Again, fighting it and not just letting it be. 

I am seeing and learning that when I feel this way, I shut the world out.  I can't talk to my dearest friends.  I really do not know how to share this part of me.  The fear of being so vulnerable.  Yet, is it vulnerability?  Just because I'm down - does that mean I can be hurt more.  I don't think so.  I can always be hurt whether I'm up or down.  Am I afraid that people won't like the 'down' me?

Maybe I shut the world out so I can go inside and figure me out.  Maybe I want to be so in control of me that I don't want to take on others thoughts and ideas on how to fix me.  Maybe, just maybe, I know (through all my years of turmoil) that only I can 'fix' the way I'm thinking; that I do have the power.  Sure, people can alter my train of thought and sometimes this is wonderful.  I would like to watch this more closely.  Perhaps, this is more about my listening; more about me being present to all of my emotions.

I love helping people when they are down; so why won't I give the same chance to another to feel good to help me when I'm down.  Is this selfishness by not reaching out?  Could it be?

Oh, it's so much more fun being up than it is being down.  Or is it?  What if they are all just feelings and I don't need to judge any of them?  What if I just let them be. 

If something happens to me on Wednesday and then the same thing happens to me on Friday, why is it possible to have two different feelings towards the same thing?

Oh, this is too deep!  I have a headache! ha.   

.	Emotions - the state of feeling; conscious mental reaction (as anger or fear) subjectively experienced as strong feeling usually directed toward a specific object and typically accompanied by physiological and behavioral changes in the body Is it possible to just watch our emotions and allow them to just be and pass through us?

To Be or Not To Be (Quiet, that is)

When a person is telling us something that is very important to themselves and we interrupt, is this helpful or hurtful.  I wanted to be quiet while a loved one was telling me a story and I just couldn't do it.  It threw them off their thinking and it changed what they wanted to say.   It actually had the affect of them not wanting to talk anymore.

I really wanted to be there and I didn't know how to listen.  Just listen.

I want to practice this today.  Practice listening and hearing what a person is telling me.  I want to let go of the need to say what I think and just listen.  I want to allow a person to express completely what they want to say and how they want to express it. 

It's hard to listen when it's not my way of talking and communicating.  It may even be hard for me to understand. 

Perhaps, me understanding is not always the important thing.  What if me just listening and letting the person know that they are heard is the important thing.

How are you at hearing other people when they are telling you something that is not something you can completely relate to?  Can you hear their story and let them own it without getting your beliefs involved?  Do you want to?

Happy Friday or is it?

Oh, it is so getting colder!   I am so feeling it and finding my body irritable and wanting to sit by the fire. 

I find it harder to post because of the way I am feeling.  I find myself wanting to hide and not share this side of myself.  I believe people don't need or want to be around this part of me.  I bet it's because I don't need or want to be around this part of me and I am putting that feeling and belief out there instead of owning it. 

Oh, I don't like the way this is going.  What an AHA moment for me!

It's a dark and blustery Friday.  The weather makes me want to hibernate and shut down.  Just what if I do that instead of thinking that this is a terrible thing to want to do.  Just because others do not feel this way, why am I so afraid/unwilling to own that I feel this way.  Again, the not accepting what is rule.

Okay, just for the rest of the day I am going to accept this is how I feel and not fight it (or at least TRY not to fight it).  (I so want to fight it! ha.)

Is there something that you can try to accept today and not fight just because fighting it is what you've always done?  Are you willing to accept what is? 

Where are you Today? Just Being

I'm just beginning by typing and seeing where this leads.

As I sit here with the fireplace on; the world outside being wet with rain and the exaggerated colors of fall; the feel of the dampness/heaviness of the wet, cool temperature; I'm just hanging.

I'm thinking it's all good.  There is a peace within me and all around me; except in my ears that still like to ring. I hear the flames of the fire coming up to meet the air.

Tiffany, the yorkie is at my feet with her toy.  Gia is laying next to me and Little Bear, my sick 'baby' is down on the floor peaceful and calm and I am concerned for her.  She's had a tough two weeks and is battling to get strong and healthy.  Durby, my Aussie, is laying outside under cover.  He loves the cooler weather.  (I'm surprised this is my dog because of the discomfort I can have with the cooler temperatures). 

Right now, right here in this moment - all is well in my life.  I am grateful.  The power of now is a beautiful power.

I see the raindrops sliding quickly off of the big leaves of the plant in the pond.  There is nothing outside but the quiet rain.  There is no breeze.  I see the rain hitting the puddles and the puddles sputtering and bubbling.

I am thankful for such peace and such beauty.

Is there something(s) you would like to acknowledge as being grateful and thankful for today?

The I's

    The eyes are the mirror to the soul.
                                The I's are the mirror to the soul.

Being Authentic

- Being authentic and real - it's the only real joy.

- Being really who you are and present is the best thing there is.

- Live in the present and be grateful for what is working and not too impressed with what is not working.

     Ali McGraw




If you are always trying to be normal, you will never know how extraordinary you can be.

    Maya Angelou




This past week has been chaos after chaos and I'm still standing somewhat peacefully.  There is always peace in the chaos and always chaos around the peace.  We always have a choice of our focus.

   Mercedes Flair



We can be dealing with 'life' and still be us.

How are you today at being the authentic you?  No matter what is going on in your life, will you choose to show the real you?  If no, what percentage of you are you willing to show?  Dare to show 10% more than you think you can?    

Dazed and Confused

I am dazed and confused recently.  Don't want to be.  Do not want to admit it.  However, that is where I am. 'I've got nothing'........... ha.

Breathe and Dream and Smile

For just a few minutes out of your busy day,  Breathe, Dream, Smile!

It's My Prerogative

Prerogative - an exclusive right, a privilege, a power

Heard the song twice in the same hour today.  The second time I listened. 
'I don't need permisson to make my own decisions, that's my prerogative."

We have a choice to live our lives.  No one stops us but us.  And fear, perhaps.

We can really check in with ourselves and know what makes us happy.  Can we let everything and everyone else go and choose happy.   That is up to us.

I'm so in the middle of this right now - my mind can't get it on so to speak.  I really believe this and, yet, I cannot seem to choose it as much as I'd like to.  Another work in progress for me.

It's our prerogative.  No one can tell us what to do.  (If we choose this.)  Live our lives for ourselves.

What would you like to do today to be your 'happy' and use your prerogative?

Paying Attention to What We Feel

I realized yesterday that I am not too good at paying attention and owning what I feel.  I think I may tell myself that I'm not worthy of feeling this; I may tell myself no one else feels this or may even understand it, so it must be wrong for me to feel this way.

I am learning that what I feel is ME.  What I feel is REAL.  What I feel is perfectly 100% okay to pay attention to it and respond accordingly.

I want to try not to say the things that will not allow me to pay attention to my true self.  I want to own what I feel and know it's not only okay to believe in the feeling; but it's my birth obligation to do exactly that.  Realize what I'm feeling and keep it real and true and okay.

This then turns into being vulnerable for me.  Oh, the real me - can I possibly share and show it to the 'world'. 

You betcha  - I'm ready.  Because I believe the realness of US is what is going to make this world work better; happier; more in sync and fuller for us all.

Are you ready to try to be really real with who you are and what you feel?  I say 'bring it'!

U

Do you know that you can never go anywhere in your life that you are not going to be there?  Joyce Meyer

What kind of person do you want to hang out with for the rest of your life?

Important to Quiet the Mind

"When our minds are quiet, that's when transformation can take place."   Mark Allen


Change happens.  Change is one sure thing.  I'd like to be a part of my ever-changing life and I'd like to choose to build it to suit and follow my happiness.

Just a Challenging Day

Okay.  I had a challenging day of natural disasters.  Unexpected things that needed attention.  Hello. 

Basement floods to the point of having to pull up the gym floor, the aerobic floor and probably the playroom floor. 

Daughter hurt her back to the point of great pain.

Puppy still having to be confined after talking with the doctor.

So, I can really hate the 'stuff'.  I did.    I can be fearful of the 'stuff'.  I was.  I can say it is what it is and it will all get taken care of and go in the direction it needs to go.  I said it.

"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass but learning to dance in the rain."

I did the best I could and I feel I did better than before; however, I'd like to do better than I did.

I love myself enough to find dancing through the storm.  (And, let's face it, how I perceive it all and take it all in, mostly, does not change the outcome! ha!).   I choose 'dancing' as often as I can.

What are you doing/feeling when a storm hits your 'neck of the woods'?  What would you like to do?

Stillness

Sit in stillness.

Motivated - Just a Feeling?

Yes, I do feel motivated again and on the same day as my 'down, unmotivated' day!  Wow, awareness sure is helpful.

It's still dark and dreary outside and I feel like going to do an errand or two.   

So, this is proof to me that if we just let 'it' be and wait 'it' out (whatever 'it' is in the moment) - time passes and so do our feelings. 

This is good and bad news.  It's good that the (what I perceive to be) the bad and not fun feelings leave us; but that also means that the good and fun feelings leave us also.  The tide comes in and the tide goes out.

So, maybe we can just let emotions come and go (perhaps even watch them come and go) and not always label them and just be with them.  Be ourselves with them.  Be U with them. 

Maybe life can be easier if we do not attach another feeling on them.  i.e.  not liking the word unmotivated and liking the word motivated.  Maybe I can just allow both feelings to just flow through me.  I can certainly ask myself if my feeling guilty (did i do something intentionally to hurt someone) is correct in the situation I am feeling it and choose to keep the guilt or let it go.

How are you at allowing the full spectrum of feelings flow through you?   Do you find yourself liking some and not liking others?  Maybe, just for today, try not labeling them and just loving the truth of them. What if they all have a positive purpose in our lives? 

Guilt

Okay, so I'm still in my down mode; however, I took a beautiful, deep nap and feel better - stronger. 

I also feel guilt.  Why should I get to sleep when others cannot.  There are so many other things that could be done and people and dogs I could pay attention to and, yet, I'm sleeping in the middle of the day.  A rainy, dark, dreary day.

I could choose to say how lucky I am to be able to take a nap when I am tired on a dark, dreary day!  I could smile about it.  I am more 'me' beause of it.

I could also beat myself up and play the guilt card so to speak. 

Which choice feels better?  I think we all know the answer to that!  ha!

Guilt is okay to feel if I've done something intentionally to hurt someone.  If nothing intentionally hurt someone by me taking a nap, then I am not allowed to feel guilty.  No need to feel guilty.  It is feeling guilty for nothing and that is more than silly and useless; wasted energy even. 

I can honestly say no one was hurt by me taking a nap!  I may just go take another!  In fact, I'm a happier person to be around because of my nap.

Next time you feel guilty; ask yourself if you have done something intentionally to hurt someone.  If the answer is no, feel completely free to let go of the guilt.  It is not yours to own under this circumstance.  It is, perhaps, a habit that you taught yourself and/or learned from someone else. 

Guilt does have a place and I think alot of us may use it too much.  If we do not hurt someone on purpose, guilt is no longer allowed. 

I believe guilt is something we started 'owning' somewhere in our life and, therefore, it is something we can disown or at the very least, question.

hip hip hooray!

Down Day

Today I seem to be having a 'down' day. I am resonating with the damp, cool, and dreary day.  I'm trying to choose to just be with and accept it. 

There is a part of me that wants to fight it because I want to be up and happy and to feel energetic.  However, I do not. 

So, try something new; right?

Okay, so today I am accepting that I am tired, miserable and unmotivated.  (Oh, I don't like that word unmotivated)!    Okay, so today I am trying to accept that I am unmotivated. 

What if it's just what I need to be motivated.  Accept the unmotivated feeling and it may possibly turn into motivation.  Is this possible for me. 

I will let you know....

Is it possible to accept exactly where you are at today?  Accept it, watch it and hope and plan for what you perceive as better.

I do believe we get through mostly everything; if not everything.  Don't like something; wait a bit, it will change with awareness and desire to do so. 



Just like the tide changes, so does our lives; our feelings; our emotions.
What if it is as simple as this is how it's meant to be.
We accept the tide change; perhaps we can accept our feelings and emotions as they change.



Cold

COLD.  People that know me know that this is one of my least favorite things, subjects, feelings.  I do not like the cold.  My circulation seems to get very slow to my extremities and I'm pretty uncomfortable.  My hands and feet turn purple. I lose tissue on my fingertips if I stay in this state too long.

The weather is turning colder here in the Northeast United States.  I love the beauty of the colors of the leaves; it's such a magical time.  Red, orange, yellow against the blue sky - there is nothing like it!  Probably if I ever did move to a warmer climate year round - this would be the one season I would miss.  However, I do not like what it means.  It means winter is coming and without the sun for days and the freezing cold - it's tough for me.  This is what my mind believes because more than not this has been the truth for me for most of my life.

There was one year when I was jogging through and around the ice and piles of snow.  I remember this and it was fun.  I wonder how I did that?!?  My mind and body were telling me different than what I experienced most winters.  I wonder if I can have my mind and body work that way this winter.  I guess the excitement and anticipation and dread is starting for me already.

I remember telling my masseuse one Fall that my 'backyard was closed'.  That's when I realized in my mind my backyard was already closed.  Didn't realize this was a reality for me just because of the thought.  That was an aha moment for me.  My backyard closed - wow  - just a belief and it was very real and true for me.  Was it really closed - no.

As I sit here, my toes are numb and my fingers are a very low scream and it's only in the 50s.  I realize the drastic change in the temperature and my body do not get along very well.  It takes me a bit to adapt.

I love breathing the cool fresh air; I love when I feel invigorated by it; I love putting on my Uggs.  I do not like the lack of sunshine for days, wearing big heavy coats, shivering and freezing.  How weird is it that my hands are responding and the fingers are turning a bit purplish as I think this.  HOW STRONG ARE OUR MINDS!  Wow. 

I started writing this with hesitation and thinking I was probably not going to 'publish' it.  I'm still not sure where I'm going with it; if anywhere.  This hits 'home' for me completely.  It's probably my biggest battle.

OK, I now have many more 'tools' to think differently; do differently.  Fear of not feeling well; of suffering; of not living my life fully plays a really big part for me.  I know I can be in control of the temperature of my body.  I will take this thought with me as I continue on into the colder months. I hope I can keep it with me anyway!

Is there something small/big/in between that you would like to change/enhance/delete from your thinking?  Is it possible if we really, truly are ready to change our thought pattern and do it differently we can think and do it differently to be a happier, healthier human being?

I know one psychologist said that just by changing how we do things automatically - like putting our right leg into our pant leg first or drying our backs first when getting out of the shower --  if we do things like that differently there is a momentum that changes and that alone can maybe be a start towards more awareness and change.  Maybe it doesn't hurt to try it?  You know I did and still do at times! 

Make it a great day for you!  Notice how you automatically just do things and maybe change one way or another the way you do it.  Have fun playing!  Perhaps, change it up some just because you can.

Reminding Myself of What I Want

I'm back home on the east coast.  Wow.  Life.  My one little dog is very sick and has to be confined to a small room and alot of driving around and having to unpack and the usual things that await a person when they come back from being away...

I find myself getting caught up in fear, anxiety, and disarray.

I see and hear myself constantly saying I trust the process; I'm okay; I can handle anything; Even though it's what I consider to be a bad day, I'm okay with it.  I remind myself I can accept what is and take it from there.

It's working fairly okay.  Do I feel fearful and anxious at times - yes.  However, a lot less than when I don't remind myself of the way I want to feel and be.

Will you remind yourself of the way you want to feel and be today?