Seriously

"Don't take yourself too seriously.   No one else does."  Ha.  Dr. Bill DeMio

How serious do you take yourself and 'how's it working for you'? 

Shake and Roll

I'm a bit shaky lately.  I have imminent death and many struggles for some loved ones that I care about deeply.   I am riding the roller coaster of life with them and there is much beauty and abundance of what feels like darkness and despair. 

BE TRUE TO WHO YOU ARE.  OWN WHAT IS YOURS TO OWN.  ALLOW OTHERS TO OWN WHAT IS THEIRS TO OWN.

I believe this is our only way out of where we are as a whole planet; as life on this Earth. It could be my middle age.  It could be just what I'm choosing to see.   It could be, in fact, abundant right now.   It could be more awareness on my part.  It could be a lot of things. 

I wish it could be over.

I would like to see laughter, togetherness, happy living and I'd like to feel pleasantness.   These things are in our world.  It is in our world in abundance, in fact.  It is here for the taking.

I need to walk through and with what is.  I need to feel and explore what is.  I need to release and let go of things that I want to be different if I have no ability of changing them.  I need to choose to embrace them instead. 

I do not want to let go of others.  I do not want to let go of hope.  I will not let go of love and faith.  I will not let go of us. 

So, as I 'shake' forward into what is present in my life, I embrace as many as possible.  I hold on to love and my truth.  I see with my heart.  I feel with my being.  I know with my mind.

I am whole with all of my many imperfections within myself and within my world.   I am whole.

So, as I shake.  I also roll.

May you roll with what is as you shake out what you can.

Life & Growth

"If life is something to be cherished; why do some try to endure it."  Unknown

"The ability to fantasize is the ability to grow."  Ray Bradbury

Peace

Peace.

What does this mean to me now-a-days...  What comes to mind is how stores/businesses used to be closed once in a while.  The mall was always closed on Sunday way back when and many holidays businesses would be closed also.  People wouldn't work around the clock so much.  We would have picnics and barbeque with black charcoal.  I remember running around the backyard as a child waiting for the coals to go white so we could cook on them.  (This is what happens when I do a middle of the night post!)

Now, many carry their cell phones with them to bed.  To be without one, is to feel 'lost' or 'disconnected'.  How wonderful it is, to type in a few words and learn about anything at all that I find myself curious about.  How wonderful it is to be able to connect to a friend or relative many, many miles apart or even oceans apart in a matter of seconds.

We used to mail a letter and wait for a response for 3 or 4 days at least.  Now, if my computer is slow - (what, 8 seconds) I can find myself frustrated or feeling like I'm having to wait too long. 

Much has changed in our generation.  I remember when my mother-in-law had a hard time with an answering machine and a big, chunky computer game of "Space Invaders" or "pong" were our two and only choices.  Now, we are reading books on a hand held screen and holding thousands of books at a time wherever we are!  Whew!  Quite an astonishing accomplishment.  We can talk to each other on a screen and carry each other's faces around with us LIVE. 

I come back to my first thought.  Peace and what it means to me in today's world.  I'm not sure I have it quite totally figured out.  I'm not sure I have peace all the time easily gained.

Sure, I can read my book; go for a walk; move and/or stretch; go to a movie.  However, this usually happens while I'm recording a show, doing a load of wash, taking pictures with my phone, writing down thoughts, and receiving communications.  I'm not sure I find my peace in this...My life feels FULL.  How lucky and, yet, how startling it can feel/be.

First thing in the morning, instead of stretching or focusing on myself, I grab my phone and see what's up in the world. 

I'm knowing that this is a choice I make.  I know that it is up to me to do different.  I know it's up to me to bring peace to myself.  I don't want to feel left out.  I want to be and feel connected.  There is a great need for me to feel connected.

Mmmm.  Can I, though, allow myself some disconnectedness at times....  Can I allow myself some ME time without any 'noise' or have tos or will dos or one moments or ttyl/brb(s).  Can I just BE?

I know that yes, I can.  I know that it's harder than it used to be for me.  I think it may (for me) have to be a conscious thought, a choice that I choose to disconnect and allow the world to flow/move/drive/tweet around me while I get my peace on.

Are some peaceful with the flow/move/drive/tweet moving through them... I'm thinking, yes, many.  However, I do not know for certain. 

May you know what peace means to you and may you have you some peaceful moments if peace isn't in your every moment.

We move forward together.

OH MY Oh My oh my

Oh my.  Did I have great opportunity for 'evolution' and 'transformation' (ha) this morning.  TRIPLE QUADRUPLE YIKES is how it 'felt'.  'Exciting' is what my brain knew.

I woke up thinking I didn't want to do the responsible things I knew I needed to do.  I woke up with resistance to the day - to life.  I walked the dogs with one throwing up and slobbering on herself and I had no tissues to help her out.  Her stomach was upset.   She threw up; I carried her; I put her down; and she went on her merry way.  It was just wonderful to watch her let the moment pass and her spirit shine on.

I get home and I make a phone call to start the process of having one of my daughters horses declared ad determined as to what to do with it because it can "no longer show".  THIS IS A BIG ONE FOR ME.  When I had to put my Durby dog down, it was HUGE.  And, having to deal with a 'closing' situation; a dream not coming true for my beloved daughter (it was her intention to start showing him again very soon); well, this is SO MUCH HARDER for me.  When it is my pain it's one thing; when it's my daughter's pain - it is so much worse -  I heard myself thinking and saying.

At this moment, my longest, dearest friend called me on the telephone.  I proceeded to tell her how I was freaking out, shaking, and having the hardest time with the phone call I just made to see what's best to do for this big and beautiful creature.  It is no longer necessary for him to be at the show grounds.  He is no longer a current show horse and this sad and hard truth came so suddenly.  He will always be a champion show horse in our eyes. 

Anyway, I was letting my friend know how my emotions were extremely lit up and, yet, I got the job done.  I was hurting badly AND I was in the zone discussing the particulars.  I was going in and out of feeling my vast emotions And stating the facts.  I heard my weak voice turn strong and then weak and then strong as we were discussing my immediate situation.  She helped me talk through it all and we came up with that I  was feeling this way because of who I am, where I've been, what I've experienced.  Others would handle it differently.  The factor that I was hurting terribly and it wasn't helping me or the situation or my daughter, is something we went further into. 

I realized then that I was able to use my heart And my brain well.  However, I was using them independently from one another.  When I first went to a psychologist, she had me draw a picture of myself.  My neck and head were not attached to my body in this picture (hence, brain and heart were separated).  This thought came up for me.  I realized that this morning I have an opportunity to learn and allow myself to shine fully.  It's time for me to have my brain and my heart work in unison to live; to participate in every minute of every day at will.  My unconscious habit of only feeling is no longer the habit that I want to use as my go-to habit.  I want to create a new habit of taking on any situation with my heart and my mind together.  In other words, I want to be what the common folk would call an 'ADULT'.  Mmmmm

So, I sit.  I'm back to the SIT.  I honor the SIT.  This, too, is a choice.  My health is what has brought me here.  My openness is what has prevailed.  My tenacity is what gives me strength and my endurance and faith is what's driven me in this direction.  So, I sit with it. 

What's a woman to do.  What's a man to do.  What's a child to do.

May you be sure that your brain and your heart are introduced to each other and working together as a team if this is what feels right to you.

To me, this is living FULLY OPEN, READY and WITH EVERYTHING I AM in total beingness in each and every moment.

This is being me. 

So, now I am choosing to have my brain meet my heart and my heart meet my brain and allow them to unify and work together with the rest of this body that I inhabit.  Get it... In Habit  (I'm really crazy or really brilliant  how I get to these things.  lol)   I'd like to believe brilliant and it's probably both.  But, crazy in the sense of allowing what is inside of me no matter how different, strange or unknown it is and learning/growing from same.

This 'work' is exhausting, exhilarating and a must for me.  I've come this far, I will not stop now.

                                         A restaurant in Miami, Florida, USA

Shells and Masks

A turtle represents being in a shell and a raccoon represents wearing a mask.

I want/need to let the real me shine through in every aspect of my life; everywhere I am.  No more masks; no more shell.

Scary stuff...     Doable?  I believe!

Am I ready..... I have NO clue how....

Just do it.....   Well, when I can, I will.  I believe.

Are you ready to shine your light fully?  Let YOU shine.  Shine on. 

SHININ used to be my license plate in my early 20s.  Then it went to BCHBOD for Beachin Bodies; then SHMBLA for Shambala; now Be U for Be U.  

Oh the webs we weave, the places we go, the things we do ALL comprise who we are, yet, many of us (including myself) do not really know who we are in totality.  I have ignored myself.  Thus, shells and masks.  Mmmmm

WHAT A HOOT - I CRACK MYSELF UP!  LOL

I Realize

I have been 'quiet' - away from my computer for a bit.  There has been much contemplation and much awakening within.

I realize that I am the one that keeps myself alone if I find myself lonely.  I realize that I am the one that puts the amount of importance on my disease.  I realize that I had played the scleroderma down; had acted many times like I could deal with it when really I was falling apart.  I realize that I am the one that creates my thoughts and even the thoughts I may not create, I choose to let in.  I realize that only I can give in to negative thoughts or words that hurt me.

I realize that I am the only one that is truly in control of my reactions to anything and/or everything.  I realize that where my thoughts go - there go I.

I realize I'm real good at feeling other people's feelings and, perhaps, could be better at feeling my own.

There's much realization going on inside of me and WOWZA; it hit me like a shooting star might explode in the sky.

So, I am choosing to allow this realization to settle in - question it; toss/turn it; and put some of it under the microscope that is my being and destroy what does not feel happy and hold on tight to what feels marvelous.

I realize this is a choice.  A choice only I can choose for myself.  A choice only you can choose for yourself.

May you choose wisely today.

I saw a woman, Ayana Mathis, on the OWN channel being interviewed by Oprah.  This woman wrote the book "The Twelve Tribes of Hattie".   I had the pleasure of seeing, hearing, feeling and learning as this interview allowed for a wonderful exploration of creating words from the brain and out of the mouth directly from the heart's spirit.  This is exactly how it felt to me.  Brava Ladies.... Brava.

May you allow what your heart's spirit is feeling to be voiced through the brilliance of YOU.

What's It All About

I decided to push through my fear and something surely is pushing back.  I am taking in much.  I am being given more opportunity to learn and to grow.  Eh gad.....

Many big changes are on the horizon.  I am now in Florida - place of my dreams to live.  I am still unsettled and I am having a great experience at this apartment complex.  It's quite different than what I am used to and I am seeing things (life) in a new light.  I had to buy oven cleaner (yikes, lol) at the grocery store today.  This is something I haven't had to do for many, many moons. 

I noticed that there are many turtles swimming around in the lake out my window.  I've seen them before AND I just became aware of them now.  I made it to the pool yesterday for a bit and there was a raccoon there taking up residence as an unpaid tenant.  I look up "turtle" in the "Animal Speak" book by Ted Andrews and it says to also look up raccoon.

I was going to break down (ha) and buy tiny bottles of champagne today at the grocery store.  I've been contemplating it for a while.   I put them in my shopping cart.  I never drink alcohol (since my daughter was born) because of the medicine I am on.  During my trip around the store - I did take the four pack out of the shopping cart one time and I put it back in.  When I got to the check out, it did not come up on the bar code so the four little bottles are still at the grocery store. 

We are starting the process of giving up our beautiful home up north; the one that was built from our love, sweat, joy, strength and many other things. 

My 92 year old aunt has decided to try a retirement home even though "she is too young".  It is not an easy transition for anyone.  It has been two months.

Many friends are having huge and monumental situations in their lives and we are all doing the very best that we know how.

It was helpful to hear one lovely friend tell me that their childhood home that they have returned to all their life (almost 50 years ago) is also being contemplated for sale.  How lucky I am that people share their true lives with me.  It helps me greatly.  It gives me much perspective.

Another wonderful woman friend left me a message on my cell and not hanging up continued to tell someone in her presence about my autoimmune disease; how I don't have finger nails and how the cold hurts me so.  She lovingly told the story.  It was helpful and I was honored to hear her express her care from her heart. 

We all have our 'stuff'.

My morning was a very 'weirdo' morning.  I sit in it.  I feel it.  I breathe it.  I trust that I will be okay and I'm right where I am supposed to be.  I do wish I could GET ON WITH IT already, however. 

May you keep your heart open and let it shine in others' lives so we can all find our way through with pride, excitement, anticipation, joy, love, trust, truth and connectedness. 

We are all powerful beings just as we are...  We breathe.

While Pushing

While pushing through fear, I feel my body and mind wanting to shut down.   Is this a protective mechanism that is built in? 

Adrenaline builds up, tension is created and shallow breathing occurs.  I can force myself to take long deep breaths lovingly, I can mentally relax my body and I wait for the adrenaline build-up to break down.

I feel current and full right now.  I find it hard to focus and I believe I am looking for answers that are just not here for me just now.  (I'm thinking the words "current and full" have 'appeared here' to mean I am right where I am supposed to be.)

Our one horse has decided to just STOP in the middle of a jump while showing and is refusing to 'play' along smoothly.  He doesn't want to cooperate and it was decided to let him rest for the remainder of the week instead of what we had planned. 

So, we create with what is and allow, with love and support of self and others, life to play out as we proceed through and forward with what is and will be.

Fighting seems to take more energy for me.  Of course, the fight is what some of us believe pushes us forward.  I know I've seen it work within myself.

I'm just wondering that... while I am so used to one way, if I let go of this way and open myself to new and different ways - well, this option is something I'm ready to try.  Try a different route if the one I'm using again and again and again gives me the same result of poor health or a negative result. 

If I've always worked at 100% and I sometimes allow myself to work at 70%  - this is worth a try to create a more peaceful self that I can share with others. 

I am definitely learning that just because I've always done it 'this' way and it worked for me in the past; it does not mean that this is still the accurate way to do it in today's world.  (same thing said in many different ways -- mmmm)

It's an evolving world and new ways may just be better.  I say try it.  I won't know unless I do.

So, as I walk through fear; as I walk with an open heart and open mind, I see and feel things I have never been in touch with before.  I create anew.  I create new paths.  I create an 'evolved' me.  I create.

May you watch and create an evolving YOU while you walk through fear and do 'it' better.  A tall order and so possible.

As I let go and create anew; there certainly is a 'fight' within me.  I feel the waves of myself crashing on the shore and I am finding a new ebb and flow to who I am and what I'm about.  Currently, I am feeling like a 'lulu' and I'm not making much sense to myself; and, perhaps, you.  I am trying to trust that this is part of the process and it is not that I am going bonkers.  Letting go and holding on and creating anew are all very different strengths and, for me, it is the  complete process that is taking place within.  It's very exciting, very scary, very unsettling and I am most hopeful.

So, if I can allow my 'crazy' lovingly and openly, my hope is that you can too.  Especially, if it helps you to be ALL IN this world of ours as the total YOU.  May you bring yourself, all of you, with you as much and as truly you as possible.  I believe that this is what's going to create the best world possible for all of us to live out today and all our future days.  BEING AND SHOWING WHO WE TRULY ARE -- ALL OUR STRENGTHS AND ALL OUR WEAKNESSES when it is warranted. 

We only get one shot at living this life.

""You know," he told her, "there are better things to aspire to than being normal."  "Like what?"  Bending his head, he murmured near her ear.  "Being exactly who you are.""  From Lisa Kleypas' book "Crystal Cover (Friday Harbor).

Fear itself

I am noticing that fear of myself, not being able to do things in our outside world, is loud and clear.  I realize that it is TIME to WALK THROUGH THIS FEAR.  To just do and be - move forward - THROUGH THE FEAR.  If I cannot do it - then allow myself some fear, perhaps.  But, to not try and stay stagnant and paralyzed is no longer working for me. 

It is time for me to walk through the fear.  Make the plans and see what happens.  Make the plans, get excited about the plans instead of worrying if I will be able to make them or have to back out at the last minute.

It's time for me to play!   It's time for me to live!   It's time for me to fly!

I walk through my fear.  "The only thing to fear is fear itself."  President Roosevelt

May you walk through your own fear and see what's waiting on the other side for YOU.

Horsin Around

I'm off to the horse show down here in Wellington, FL where there are many, many people with their beautiful horses.  It is such a different world for me; even after doing this with my daughter for 10 years, I'm still the outsider looking in (and I'm the only one that knows this).  Ha.

So, off I go.  Today is another day to create an okay, good or great day - depending on my thoughts.

May you allow your happy thoughts to take precedence over anything that may have the possibility of not creating a nice day for you.

Be You

 

"When we love all parts of ourselves, when we bless all of ourselves, when we honor all of our history and all of our insecurities, doubts, worries, and fears, we become the women that we always wanted to be."  Debbie Ford

 

Are we ready -- women and men....?

 

 

45 deg. F

It is 45 deg. F outside here in sunny Florida this morning.  There is an 'angry' wind that makes it feel in the 30s.  Need I say more?  Ha.

The beauty of this day, for me,  is that it will not last.   It will warm up.  I'll be comfortable once again.

Believe.

May you believe that this time will not last.  It will never stay this way 100% again.  Perhaps, this is a good news/bad news thing.  Mmmmmm

May you live like you know change will come.  Enjoy    or     persevere    AND change will come. 

                    This is the parking lot at the horse show after we had record breaking rain amounts.

A Beautiful Being

A young beatiful woman, inside and out, sent this to me on text.  It is worth a share.  I hope you enjoy it.

I'd like to add - The Truth Shall Set You Free.

May you BE what you know you need to BE today.

You are Always You

From the book, "The Last Boyfriend:  Book Two of the Inn Boonsboro Trilogy" by Nora Roberts

"I'm still not done.  Whether you're happy or sad or mad or glad, you're still you.  If you figure I'm only around--or you decide you only want me around--when everything's solid, you're wrong, and you're stupid.  It's not going to work that way for me.  It's never been surface with us, and whatever else has changed, that can't.  That's the bottom line."

I have some kind of issue that I have to be up or happy or feeling no pain to be out and about and with people.  I want to be my happy; sad, mad; pained or glad self out in the world.....

Because the bottom line - whatever I'm feeling and however I'm being.... I'm still ME.

May you know that whatever you are feeling and however you are being.... YOU are still You and people that love you and are best in your life -  WANT YOU there with them.   This is the bottom line.

Meteorite Hits Russia

I don't know much about this.  I only saw on the news that way too many were hurt and a meteor fell out of the sky and hit Russia.  I AM SORRY if you are or know someone that is affected by this crazy natural disaster. 

How do we feel safe again after we have been through a natural disaster....  We know it CAN happen; we lived through one (or more). 

How do we trust that we are safe...   Is it best if we tell ourself that God has us and our destiny is what it is so worrying changes nothing.  Live each day as best, as honest and as full of joy as we can and share today with our loved ones, our peers, the beauty that IS all around us.

What comes to mind is that some believe we get constant reminders; game changers; nudges to go in certain directions in our lives.  They start off soft and they get harder and bigger until we finally hear them and our path changes.  Is this what happened here....

Why does it feel to me that innocent people get hurt...  Is this something to do with that most of us have a bigger heart opening to innocent people than people who have 'wronged' us or our community.  Do we SEE easier when innocent people are hurt....

What would our world be like if we all lived together in the harmonious way and speak/share our truth instead of allowing it to grow into anger and something ugly. 

I've been feeling and knowing lately that the best way to solve an issue with someone is to talk it out with them..  ooooo scary.   But, talking about it to others will not SOLVE it.  Keeping it in and bottled up will not solve or change my dilemma.   If I talk to the person I have uncomfortable feelings with, there is a chance of solving same. 

What if conflicts arise because we see something in the other person that reminds us of something we do not like about ourselves....   What if we create conflict because of what we believe another SHOULD be doing or saying.  (This can be especially hurtful if we do not give the other person a chance or inkling on how they could help us.)

I read a word last night - 'islets' which means (anatomy) a portion of tissue structurally distinct from surrounding tissues (kindle dictionary).  I highlighted this word because I felt that my skin was like this.   Parts of my skin are islets.    I decided this morning to think and put more focus on the healthy skin on/in my body.   There is way more of the healthy than not.

Perhaps, we can focus on the truth of our uncomfortableness and go to the source (or what we believe to be the source) and share our uncomfortable truth with this specific person.  It is definitely worth a shot at making it better.  Just what if it worked!  If not, we know we gave it a true shot and I move on from there.

I hope I see more about this crazy meteor as to better understand what happened.  I don't like that it happened there and I don't like that it happened at all.  Did it get attention where attention was needed....  I don't know.  I pray good comes from the ugly.

Our world is changing.  My world is changing.   My thoughts and being are changing.  I'm in a kind of limbo just now.  It is not the most comfortable of places for me.   I do trust that I'm right where I'm supposed to be.

I create with what is.

May you create you with what is your truth, your surrounding, your knowledge and with the heart of who you are.

My sympathy for the people that had to experience a meteor falling from our sky.

We are powerless amongst much.  We are not powerless with how we see, feel, deal and create with what is.

Better, more meaningful days are here.  It's up to us how we see and live them.  This is good news/bad news, perhaps  -- that it is totally up to us.   Ha.

Lisa Kleypas

From her book, "Crystal Cove (Friday Harbor)", Lisa Kleypas writes:

""I wasn't heroic," Jason said, uncomfortable with the praise.  "I just did what was necessary."  She smiled at him.  "Isn't that the definition of a hero?""

..."no matter how old you get, you're always capable of surprising yourself."

May you pleasantly surprise yourself today.

Scared

"She was scared, but that was a good sign; it was when you stopped feeling scared, when you stopped caring, that you were in the worst danger."      From the book "Crystal Cove (Friday Harbor)" by Lisa Kleypas.

Being frightened is not the best feeling, however, ...

May you allow what scares you to push you forward; beyond; and out of your box to success.

                                                 YOU GOT THIS DUDE/DUDETTE!

Love

""Love will break your heart," Sage had once told Justine, "but love can also mend it.  Not many things in life are both the cause and the cure.""

From the book "Crystal Cove (Friday Harbor)" by Lisa Kleypas

Involved

"We are involved, you and me.  You matter.  I'm telling you what I'm going to do because I figure when people are involved, when they matter, they tell each other."   From the book, "The Next Always:  Book One of the Inn BoonsBoro Trilogy by Nora Roberts

May you be involved in a way that feels best to you -- that accomplishes you to happiness and ease.

No Dumping

I'm running out of monologues with my posts.  I'm not feeling like I have too much to say.  I'm not 'chomping at the bit' to type or write.

No words are in my head or fingers.  My mind is quiet.  or empty.... yikes.

Perhaps, this is a good thing.  I do not know for sure.

This is my truth today and even lately.

So, I continue on.

May you be aware, know your truth and be okay with what is.... as you continue on.

Downpour

It is another pouring-down-rain-day here in South Florida.  Yesterday, I went to play with the horses in the puddles.  I am on my way again this morning.  Dark skies threatening.......

Do I embrace this; do I stay home; or do I accept and enjoy as best I can.   I'm thinking I'll shoot for the third option I am giving myself today -- accept and enjoy as best as I can.

May you enjoy your day, today, as best as you can....   (I hope this leaves you to wide open, lovely situations.)

-

Happy Valentines Day

While I know this is not the 'theory' behind Valentines Day,

May you look in the mirror and tell yourself five things you love about yourself today.

Lessons/Learning/You

There are many lessons in each day for all of us to learn.  We never know everything even though I sometimes want to believe that I do! 

Learning is exciting to me.  I love new adventure, new places, new people and things. 

When there is trouble in my heart; I realize this may just be the best opportunity of learning.  Suffering can produce many lessons.  In joy, there are lessons to be learned.

Lessons are all around us constantly.   I'm sure I miss many, I'm sure I pick the ones that are, hopefully, best for me in the moment and some keep coming and coming at me because I have not had the ability to learn it yet.

May you see the lesson, embrace the lesson and be more whole because you have received the lesson that is right in front of you.

Owning

I'm realizing I'm owning way too much what is not mine.  Heartbreak, turmoil, pain, and others' truth is just that; others.

I care and want to help and I have to have a boundary of what is theirs and what is mine.  Perhaps, I can even go as far to say that owning more of mine and less of others just might be my next project.

I have a lot of good and instead of focusing on this, I am, perhaps, too focused on what is not good and my own and others' struggles as well.

I wish I was taught boundaries, love of self, money and just life in general in school rather than some of the things I was taught by memorization, reading and listening to lectures.

It would have been very helpful to me to be told that I can take up space in this world and that I matter and that all of us are important and that each one of us has a reason to be here on this earth now at this time.  I would have liked to have heard that while we can show and share compassion and empathy for one another, it is still individual journeys that we all must take and it can be exciting and wonderful and that there is beauty even in the ugliness.

I believe there would be less ugliness if we all could look in the mirror and tell ourselves we love ourselves and that we matter while we honor other people's journey and that we are here to journey, own and experience exactly what is put in front of us.

Our thoughts and feelings are real and they matter AND that they can even guide us into the best forward path possible.

We take babies out of hospitals whether we know what to do with them or not.  We marry whether we know what we are getting ourselves into or not.  We take on things that we have no way of knowing the outcome.  I find much fascinating and exciting.  Adventure is a great thing.  Adventure with some knowledge may be even better. 

To listen to one's own self instead of wanting answers outside of our self may be a good thing to teach in schools also.

Just thinking in writing.

May you own what is yours, let go of what is not and easily know the difference.

Knowing and Doing

I know what's right for me.  Doing what's right for me is a bit more complex and difficult.  I have all these voices/thoughts that I've picked up here and there in my head that stop me from doing exactly what I know is right for my happiness.

I know what's correct and I know many answers.

Living them, being them, using them.... that's quite another story for me today.

May you KNOW and BE the answer you need/want.

Thank You

Thank you for reading my blog today. 

United States

Russia

Australia

Indonesia

Switzerland

Germany

Italy

Netherlands

Bangladesh

May you just BE U as you move forward on your journey. 

Taurus

Week of February 10, 2013

"Weekly Forecast for Taurus (April 20 – May 20) Building a new dream takes time and patience. It’s possible you’ll venture in a different career direction. You need a job that allows you to take a creative approach. Being bound by stuffy rules will only hamper your imagination.

If it’s not possible to change jobs, take up an artistic pursuit. Writing, playing music, painting, or crafts will bring tremendous relief. You won’t make much money, but they’ll give you emotional fulfillment. Turn a deaf ear to people who say you’re wasting your time. These critics are simply threatened by your adventurous spirit."

lifescript.com

May your dreams become reality as you pursue everything and anything that makes you happy.

                              

First

I'm still having trouble about putting myself first.  When I think that this is what I'm doing today - and someone or something else comes along; I change what it is I was planning to do.   I get off my schedule; my wants and my plans.

Once in a while, I do not mind at all doing just this.  However, when it seems more times than I'd like - ohhh,  I get angry at myself and the person/situation that changes my plans.  I know I am the only one that changes my plans, in truth; yet, perhaps, it's easier to blame others than to OWN this is what I am doing to myself.

So, the awareness of this is here.  I move forward with this awareness in hope to better keep some of my schedule - (mostly comes to exercise and errands for myself) and still be here for others.

I know in truth, I can be more available, fuller and happier if I put myself first to strengthen, heal and love myself stronger as I create the true woman I want to be.

Life lessons.   We all have them.   Life lessons.  May we learn them with greater ease, clarity, acceptance and allowance of deserving to be the best self that we can be.

May you put first, in your day, what will create the most whole, happy self that is YOU.

If

"If you are going through hell, keep going."  Winston Churchill

Hold On

After talking to a few people this week; I want to say Hold On, Speak Your Truth --  WAIT -- FEEL your truth, QUESTION your truth, look around and really SEE your truth...

Is what you are telling yourself your truth or is your truth something else completely or somewhere in between the two.....

If I don't feel calm and decent - I believe my truth doesn't completely add up to my reality or my needs.

May you connect to your calm and decent today.

Motivation

The word 'motivation' comes to mind.  I went to dictionary.com to see what the exact definition for it is.  'to motivate'... Ha.

While at dictionary.com, 'hent' is the word of the day.   'to seize'.

I think I'd like us to create our own motivation to hent the day.  oh jeez

Just a good a day as any!

May you hent what you really want to hent today.   lol

An interesting definition of seize is "to grasp mentally; understand clearly and completely"  (dictionary.com)

Things Change

I remember coming down to warm and sunny Florida and immediately feeling better completely.   I do feel better, however, the 'completely' part hasn't caught up yet.

I'm still achy some.   I have a hard time admitting that this is my truth.   I want it to be easier and quicker like my past experiences have always been.  However,  to no avail.

I do feel calmer, no ulcers, no constant pain.  I still feel stiff, achy and swollen.

I know exercise is going to do wonders for me.   I've had two classes so far.   I continually stretch throughout each day.  I NEED MORE.   I get caught up in putting this last for some reason.  Yet, It's what makes me happiest.

Is it about not feeling worthy of doing what makes me happy.  Is it about putting others' schedules before my own.  Is it about being stuck because my current habit has been not exercising.   I won't go to 'lazy' because I don't think this is the case.  I have this belief that if I was totally by myself; no animals/pets included, I'd be out exercising.  Do I know this for sure.... No.   I'm feeling this to be true though.

So, as I find a way to carve exercise/movement/playtime into my day more and more; I embrace where I'm at and I still know joy of what is.

It's a cloudy morning here in Southern Florida, USA.  It's is 70 deg F.  I just walked the dogs and it was very enjoyable to all three of us. 

Breakfast awaits.  I am stuck on this guacamole, garlic hummus and no salt mini pretzels.   I just love it.  My body craves it.  I greatly enjoy having a diet coke with lemon with it.   It is a party for my mouth!  I have it almost everyday.  I usually eat it for lunch and I believe I will have it for breakfast today.   Yes, I believe the diet coke is NOT the best choice; and, for now, I enjoy it. 

While my wonderful company was here, I did not have it daily.  I didn't sit long enough and we had salads and wraps mostly for lunch instead.

How interesting my day is, huh?  I could write a book.   LOL  YIKES  (boring)

May you have an interesting day no matter what you are doing and be gentle and love yourself through.  I know the saying Love Thy Neighbor as Yourself; perhaps, we need to also think Love Yourself as you Love your Loved Ones......  Mmmmmm

Have a magical day of learning.

Where I'm At

I'm stepping out more and more into the world of adventure once again!  So many people to meet; so many places to see; so many things to do.....

We do have a beautiful world everywhere.  Yes, there is also ugliness.  I believe the more truth we share with each other; the more we are able to speak our truth and allow others' their truth; our world will become more and more beautiful.  Are you ready to participate in our world with the truth of your whole self.....

I feel myself pushing too hard at times; doing things I am not really up to doing AND I also find myself living with ease and doing exactly what I want to do.

Yin/Yang    Up/Down     In/Out    Over/Under   Etc.

Is this the law of our land?   Mmmmm

My hands are swollen when I awake in the morning.   They are not throbbing or bothering me constantly as they have in the past.   My face is very tight and I have normal aging, being alive issues.

And, I have great hope, FAITH, and joy in my heart for myself and for you.

May you allow hope, faith and joy in your heart to shine within and lead you forth.  BELIEVE in what you want your life to look like; it may just surprise you if you do.....

 

Mmmmmm Ahhhhhhh

I just got back from the pool.  The sun is beautiful and the sky even moreso.  Pelicans are flying above and the palm fronds are blowing softly.  A turtle basks on the side of the lake.

I have to admit that as soon as I sit on the lounge chair, my mind goes to right where I am.   The sun on my skin and the chair supporting my body.  What I see is the blue water of the pool with the few water spouts crossing over each other.  I so enjoy being out there, relaxing, unwinding, letting go and just being.  It is a gift to myself for sure.

I took a pilates class this morning.  A pretty good concept to work from the core and stretch and elongate our muscles and to connect to our feet to feel all the different muscles and the way the foot moves and supports us.

I am so very grateful that this was my day.  I found the happiness of this and allowed myself the love and joy that I get from this kind of day.

I move forward and cannot wait until my next exercise class and I am so excited to see where exercise leads me this time.   I know it can only be GOOD; great even.

May you create AND ALLOW moments in your day to get your joy and happy on and own your truth of same.  Embrace this truth and share yourself with your people in a loving, open and supportive way.

May this be what leads you to the greatest you possible.  My greatest wish is that it is time for all of us in this world to move and 'be' in this direction.

'This' being the real joyful, fulfilled you.   OH YEAH.   Now that's what I'm talking about!  Ha!

 

Company

I have company here in Florida, USA with me.  My sister and her husband.  It's so nice to have one of my bestest of friends here with me.  

She had me at the pool today.  First time I went to the pool since I was here.

The baby steps continue.  It feels good.  It feels right.   My life is right where it is supposed to be.

How lucky am I!!!

May you allow your life to be right where it is and know that you can respond in the most favorable or least favorable of ways.... or anywhere in between.

I hope you choose acceptance with a dash of thinking 'change' and a large pinch of trust.

Spring

Happy Groundhog's Day.  Legend has it that if the groundhog sees his shadow; six more weeks of winter will follow.  If the groundhog does not see his shadow; spring will come early.

Mr. Groundhog did NOT see his shadow.  Let spring come early!

May you not see your shadow and let the real YOU come out to play and find your way and save your own day!  I better go back to bed.  LOL

 

I Am What I Think

Do the thoughts I think create my reality...  I believe so.   If I think I can; I most likely can.  If I think I can't; I most likely will not be able to.

May you be aware what you think today and, perhaps, even 'play' with it some to see if it is based on fact or something that is merely a habitual thought in your current life.

I had this thought again and again that I wanted a place to live that when I woke up in the morning and got out of bed, I could open the refrigerator.  Well, I am in an apartment that takes only a couple of steps to do so.  Did my thoughts create this.   I believe so.

If you can dream it; you can become it.

If you can imagine it; you can live it.

May you dream and imagine in the manner that you become and live what really rocks your world!  Ha.

Seeing a Pattern

I'm seeing a pattern here where I am extremely sensitive.  Moreso than I ever imagined.  I'm feeling things and noticing things that are so minute and, yet, may have a huge impact on me.

Number One is the weather temperature.   I knew last night I was feeling a bit achy and uncomfortable.  I didn't pay much attention to it.  Now, this morning, upon awakening, it is very dark, very cool, and very wet and windy.  The temperature change, even though it's 63 deg. F; it is different from yesterdays 78 deg. F.   My body feels it.  It affects me completely.  I accept it and I will trust that I will do what keeps me most comfortable as much as possible.

While out walking the dogs, this morning, it was spritzing rain.  My initial reaction was to tighten up and hurry the dogs along.   I heard myself say - "LET GO" and I realized that even though it may feel like the cold rain would kill me - in truth, it would not.  It could definitely hurt me; but not kill me on the spot.   Let go of the FEAR of this.  I relaxed my body (and mind) and it all worked out ok. 

What comes to mind are the many, many times that I didn't leave the situation, or sat through a concert, a dinner or a workday in extreme pain trying to pretend that I wasn't.  I don't ever want to do this again.

Number Two would be the energy I can feel from other people.  I feel their happiness, sadness, desperation, joy and pain.  I sense their moods and I feel what they are feeling at times.  I am most uncomfortable when I sense a feeling of sadness and what is being shown to the world is anything but.  I do not know 100% that this is what is happening.  I do know this is what I'm feeling.  I'm going to experiment with it as I move forward and mingle with the living....

I believe I have set patterns from childhood.  I believe many of my thoughts are correlated to growing up.  These thoughts were very helpful then.  I believe that some of these thoughts that I still hold on to are no longer serving me in a positive light.

I LET GO.

May you let go of a thought that hurts you everytime you think it and, perhaps, replace it with a new one or LET GO of it completely.

I'm Totally Creating

I'm totally creating myself getting lost in my day.   I am doing for others instead of doing what I know will keep me calm, at ease and happy. 

I'm giving  more than I have.

I'm totally creating the looney-bin affect in my own head and being.

May you be able to stay away from the 'looney-bin affect' as much as possible by doing what is truly best for you more than not.