Not allowed

I think it would be sad if we were not allowed to share our beauty.  What if we had no one to to share a movie with; have a conversation with during a meal; tell a joke to; or if we didn't have the ability to simply state a sentiment to a loved one. 

Could you imagine how lonely that could feel.  How empty a human being would be if they hadn't another human to share 'human-ness' with.  It makes me sad just thinking about it.

What if someone shut you off or down if you were expressing your thoughts/feelings.  What if you were ridiculed for certain beliefs.  What if no one cared what you were thinking or feeling.

To me, life is about sharing ourselves.  This is what living is to me.  If I had no one to share life with, I would not survive.  I think I would be deflated and I know I would shut down.

In fact, I think I learned about this as a child.  My guess is that a lot of us did.  Some of our parents were too busy working and being responsible and doing what they needed to get through their own lives.  Some of us didn't even have parents.

I believe, with me, I did learn how to shut down because, at times, no one was there that was able to hear my way of thinking; my different needs and beliefs.  I believed (for a time) that it was me that created more chaos in my parents' lives by just trying to share myself.

Didn't see this coming.

So, I stopped sharing.  Because, at times, when I did, I felt the response was a hollering to or ridiculed because no one around me could imagine or understand or had the time to be able to listen to me and what I was feeling.   Or I was alone.

That was then; this is now.  I can be there for me now.  I have people in my life that are able and more than willing to listen to me; to support me.  AND, most importantly, I know how to support me.  (or at least I am getting better at it)

I am realizing and believing that if I believe in myself, know I deserve goodness and happiness; I do not need others to make it so for me.  I am in charge and capable and loving and knowing.

I can take myself to the movies if I choose.  I can go out to a restaurant and there's always someone there that I can chat with or meet with.  I can call someone on the phone or even text a joke to a friend.  I am free to tell someone that I enjoy them just because.

I know blessings.  I know connection.  I know love.  I know fulfillment.  I have dreams.  I have drive.  If these things were not inside of me, I believe I wouldn't know or have them.  Everything just might come from within.  Is it mostly about the connection we have with ourselves?

Just like if someone tells you they think you have a big stomach.  If I have no problem with my stomach, it won't resonate with me.  If I am bothered by my stomach, this could affect me strongly.

We all live through our own experiences, beliefs, thoughts and knowing.

My hope for you is that you have someone that hears you.  And, on the other side, I wish you great listening skills as well.  

This is life.  Without this, I believe, I am not living.  LIVE ON!