Be U: And the Day Will Come

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Tuesday, May 8, 2018

And the Day Will Come

And the day will come...

Amen.

Amen means "so it is" and "so be it" per dictionary.com.

And so it is.

The day will come when change occurs and what we show on the outside will align with what is within us.

The day will come and we will choose to not tolerate or put up with or deal with something that is hurtful to our self again and again and again.

The day will come when we change our thinking to lift ourselves up way more often (if not always) then we put ourselves down.

The day will come when we stop the pretense and live in our truth.

The day will come when we can no longer keep quiet about something that really matters.

The day will come when speaking our truth is the only option left.

The day will come when we love ourselves enough to choose self-kindness over constantly disliking things about ourselves.

The day will come when we change our mindset to be free and not be tied down doing too many things, too often, that we really do not get contentment from doing.

The day will come when we give ourselves full permission and full freedom to live the life that is inside of us to live. We will live from the beautiful, trusting, open and honest place that is who we truly are. We will connect to our soul that speaks and we will choose our most soulful path forward.

These days will come and they will change us, if, in fact, we want to be changed.

The day will come and how you interact with everything can be better than you've ever known.

The day will come.

May this day be now.

Amen. And so it is.

Open up to everything that is you that you like, love, want, desire and choose to experience.

May your time be now.

When hurt dominates us, we share our hurt. When love dominates us, we share our love. When we hurt but believe in the power of love more, we share our hurt from a loving place.

This is the world that I want to live in now.

May this day come as soon as possible in each and everyone of us.

The joy of life is here. Let us open to it and let it be so. Amen.

The joy starts within you choosing it. You are that awesome and matter that much...

May this be your day to choose you and the world in which you wish to live...

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My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!