Be U: Heat

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Heat

My heat thermostat in my family room is on System Off.   It is 34 deg F outside. It is 77 deg in my family room.   There is heat. Mmmm

While, I much prefer this heat over freezing - something is not working properly. I have three other thermostats and they are all set and stable at the number they are programmed at. They are working properly.

Quite something.  There is always something to take care of, be aware of and decide to take action or not to take action on.

I have the 'man' coming to help. I decided to take action and call in for help.

It has been like this for a bit and I, in the past, have decided not to take action.

May you know when and when not to take action. May you always be aware. While not 'knowing' may feel like it's something that doesn't have to be dealt with - eventually; almost always, it will show up again and again until it is dealt with. This is life. There are many 'dealings' being had just now. Some I would call 'forced' dealings. Yikes.

We can deal with it now or we can deal with it later. What is the best answer for you today?

May you be aware and know when and what action is best in each situation. You are the best one to make the call for YOU.

I am learning that no one is affected by my decisions as much as I am. When I change my life; it affects me the most. When I react or listen how others would want me to, I affect me most. When I am scared or frightened when I do not listen to my inner voice, it affects me most. When I am feeling good, it affects me most. Also, what I feel can be mourned or appreciated by others. It does affect others. In the long run, only my truth is what propels me in my best direction. It amazes me how much easier it is for me to accept and adapt to other's truths more than my own. I sometimes accept others' truths more readily and easily than my own. What's up with this... It's time for me to get real and stay real about me.

I want to own my reality and either keep or change individual situations moving forward. I truly know what is best for me. I don't want to live or pretend otherwise.

Mirrors to look into; mountains to climb; roads to travel - Do this cautiously with awareness and
reach for that open blue sky. (what I think when I look at this picture).

No comments:

Post a Comment

My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!