Be U: Thunder Boomers

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Wednesday, October 9, 2019

Thunder Boomers

Oh my, we are having some loud thunder boomers threatening rain, wind and lightning. I can see it coming from the south in the distance. It amazes me. It excites me. I hurry to walk my dog to get inside before it reaches us. Sometimes, I win. Sometimes, I get wet. This is life...

Not only have I known 'thunder boomers', I have also known, seen, experienced and lived through 'life boomers'. Sometimes, they do not excite me or amaze me as much as the thunder does.

They challenge me to the point that it can feel like harassment. They swirl me around and make my head spin. They wake me up and force me to pay more attention. They guide me in a different direction. They lift me out of what I have known into what I couldn't have ever imagined. They can bring me to exactly what I have dreamed of.

We all get 'boomed' from time to time.

What comes to mind are the sayings that 'When life feels like it is falling apart, it may actually be falling into place" and "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, but learning how to dance in the rain".

May you learn your best way to stay in your passion and compassion for yourself, as best you can, in the most challenging of situations.

May you learn to hear the 'boom' and still know how awesome, exciting and wonderful your overall life has been, is, and will be.

I am heading north soon, 1200 miles, to go to a wedding where my daughter is honored to be the maid of honor and I am honored to witness her role and her best friend, who I have had the pleasure of watching grow up, enter into a beautiful ceremony of love, commitment, togetherness, bonds, family and joy. Love is in the air and it is a joyful boom.

Whatever way the booms may be showing up in your life just now; however you are experiencing them; wherever you find yourself, may you be open to the true, innate and authentic you. In doing this, your best and most true path(s) are open for you and you propel others to live from the same authenticity that they see and feel you sharing.

Booming doesn't have to be a completely harsh experience. It can be a completely loved experience. Either way, [any way] it is my wish that the true you will be shining through.

I wish for you to be in b(l)oom through your most authentic, compassionate and vibrant self.

In this, may you live the fullest experience here in the present moment and expand and stay open for every experience that life teaches, grows, loves, challenges and nudges you to. Stay in your heart. Stay in your light. Stay in your truth.

May you see, feel, know and be the most awesome you that is possible.

It won't always be easy. It won't always be challenging. May it always BE U.

May your life always be from your most truthful heart, mind, body, soul and unique experience. In this, you are your own hero.

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My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!