All or Nothing and Everything in Between

Sometimes, life seems to be going really well.  Sometimes, it feels like everything is going wrong.  Some things are black.   Others are white.

And there is a whole broad spectrum of colors and 'things' that can be going on and balancing out and taking us exactly down the road that it is best for us to travel.

Lately, I've been in 'Funkytown'.   My energy level is low.  My desire to do anything is close to non-existent.  I am tired of my routine life day in and day out.

I had a wonderful birthday with so many people reaching out and showing me love.  I was overwhelmed with it.  I am so grateful for each and everyone that stopped to say hello or offer me a 'date' or send me a gift or a phone call, facetime, text, and/or email.  My social media 'blew up' and I have been greatly honored.

There are many more people that are caring and loving than that are not.  Our world has so much to offer and the people in it are a joy to experience; especially as they come from their authentic, true, open to the be the best of themselves; caring; empathetic; and just wanting connection with other people.  I think connection with people is probably a number one thing that lifts us up; me anyway.  

I'd like to take us back to the beginning sentences that discuss the grey areas and all the colors on the spectrum.  There are even several colors of each color of the rainbow (or the chakras) that are possibilities to 'journey' through.

Life is not just black and white; good or bad; easy or hard; for fun or for working.   Life just is.

So, while a 'funk' is hovering within my energy field (ha), I choose to accept it.  I choose to think that with my feeling the funk, it will change my every day routine.  My daily routine that I'm just not feeling currently.  The one that I want a break from just now.

I want to turn my funkytown doldrums into a funkytown dance opportunity.  Perhaps, I first have to feel the 'funk' in order to allow/make/create something different/more/better to happen.

Feelings, people, experiences come into our lives just as they are supposed to for reasons that we may not know or understand.  As we 'funk out' with each endeavor with an open mind, open heart and open spirit, we just may find the next beautiful step into our best version of ourselves.

Life is a journey and I choose to live in the full spectrum without beating myself [or any color that may arise] up because it doesn't feel like I am on the easiest route.  It just may be the best route to the magic within.

This is where I want to live.   From the magic, truth, love, trust, openness and innate knowing within myself.

I am going to trust the process, trust myself and trust my journey.

May you trust the process, trust yourself and trust your journey.  Live it.  Admire it.  Believe it.  Know it.  Be it.  Walk it.  and, May you love yourself through.

I bow my head in honor of honoring what is.  There is a reason for it and all I need do is believe, experience, bend, flow and stay open.

I expand.  I choose not to contract any more.

I live who, what, where and from the me as I am now.

May you live who, what, where and from the you that you are now.

Namaste.  Blessed be.  Blessings.  Blessed.

Birth Day

Tomorrow is my birthday.  I was feeling a bit uncomfortable about it not wanting attention on me; hoping my energy level would withstand the 'happy' day that I have learned it could be.

I used to buy a new outfit.  I used to book back to back plans.  I used to be ready for anything and I was my biggest cheerleader knowing that my intent was to shine and share my own happiness and love.

Now, I'm quieter.  I'm less confident in my 'party' abilities.  I am unsure how I will handle being acknowledged...

Until it started...   Ha!

I started getting cards in the mail.  I started getting people reminding me what day it was.  I received a wonderful, unexpected and magical gift from my sister through Federal Express.  My 'friends' on social media have been starting to wish me beautiful birthday wishes.  The cards I have received have been so full of love, cheers and really deep and kind words.

How really important and special connection with people is to me.  !!  
I am so grateful for each and every connection.

I started to think what would be a good post to post out into our world on my own birthday.  What I came up with is this...

"It is always a good day to toot your own horn; in such a way where you are empowering, giving and sharing the best of who you are and what makes you You.  Honk Toot Toot!"

May you know that it is always a good day to toot your own horn in a way where your intent is to be  empowering, giving and sharing the best of who you are and what makes you You!  Honk in kindness.  Toot through love.  Toot Toot in joy.  !!

I am honored and so happy to be connected to all the fabulous people I am connected to.  I am blessed by your presence.  I am pleased if I could empower, give and/or share any positivity to your own way of Being You.

And so it is...

Cheers!  Salute!  Hurrah!

Nothing But Blue Skies...

It is 8:11 p.m. on Wednesday evening and I was blessed with the most beautiful blue sky, the moon, beautiful colors, a lovely breeze and happy dogs as the sun went down tonight.

The days seem to be zooming by.  The hours, at times, feel like mere moments.  My sleep has been sporadic but relaxed and enjoyable.  I seem to wake up often, read a few pages of a book and fall right back to sleep.  I find myself not struggling with it.  I find myself accepting it as so and believing that it is part of the process; my healing process and my growth into a deeper wholeness.  I may be nuts but that is what I am telling myself.  I feel my fingers flexing and my body relaxing deeply into the mattress. I hear myself ask for healing and wholeness; ease and the best version of myself possible.

I believe.  I believe in the possibility of it.  I believe in the possibilities of me.

I find myself alone as my husband is traveling for business.  I have my trusting and devoted animals.  My Little Bear, Tiffany (dogs) and Kali (the cat).  They keep me company and are so used to me being around.

Today, I found myself enjoying my alone time and embracing it.  I found myself sad and down. When I mentioned to a girlfriend this and commented on what a RIDE life is, she came back with 'It sure is.  Some days we ride on yachts and other days we ride on dinghies.  LOL.  That surely was funny to me.  What a hoot.  And, it isn't a stretch to experience both ends of the feelings spectrum in one day; in one hour; even in one moment.  It is the process of life, at times.

So, when you are 'riding' the yacht version, may you know great gratitude and great joy.  When you are on the dinghy version, I'd like to think that we can know great gratitude and great joy also.  It may be a bit more uncomfortable or challenging, yet, we are still living and experiencing; growing and becoming.

May you believe in the possibility of your dreams within.  May you believe in the possibilities of you.

May you be in joy as much as possible and as often as possible as you ride through your journey of living your life.

There won't be 'nothing but blue skies' for the rest of your days.  However, you can open up to the full experience of whatever is going on in the 'sky'.

Namaste.

May you let ease, love, gratitude and trust ride with you...  May you be open to experiencing it all.  

OKayness

In this moment...

When we open up to 'this moment' and enter into it through all our senses, we see it for what it is.  We don't get stuck on only the emotional, only the feeling, only the seeing, only the knowing, only the flavor, or only just the scent.  When we pull it all together and look, see, feel, know and experience the reality of it, we are bringing the wholeness of ourselves into it.  We are bringing our own, at the very least, 'OKayness' into it.

There are moments that certainly pull us away from our OKayness.  If we react from a habitual response and it doesn't feel positive...  If we react from a difficult emotional feeling...  If we react from 'well, this never happened before' or 'I always have done it this way my whole life' point of view... we get away from our OKayness within our whole self.  We may be expecting or wanting to experience this moment differently.  We are not being in this moment and experiencing and seeing it as a whole, legitimate, now and new moment.  We can easily tie it in with our ways from our past or images of what could be untruths about our future.

Just because it never happened before or we always did it a certain way does not mean that any current moment will coincide and cooperate with these stagnant thoughts or way of thinking.  We just might find ourselves challenged because of this way of thinking.

Life is always new.  Life is always changing.  Who we are is always evolving; always experiencing anew.

When we bring the truth of what we are experiencing and look at it with our whole self (all our senses), we can often and practically choose the experience we are going to have.  It is almost like stepping back or out of the experience to see it and decide from the learned and evolved being that we are in this moment, more than one way to choose to experience it.

I choose as best I can to experience each moment from peace, openness, awareness and OKayness. If I am not feeling okay, I can stop and see it from a different perspective and open up to my okayness with the experience -- trusting and believing in the process of life AND trusting and believing in the process of me and my capabilities.

If you don't like the way you are feeling, may you stop, look and listen and choose your reaction knowing that you are okay even though you may not like the situation.  You are okay in your oneness with this moment.

Yes, you are having a panic attack.  Yes, you are experiencing fear.  Yes, you are experiencing pain.  Yes, you are experiencing a huge desire to want things to be different.  Yes, you are experiencing wanting to know something that you don't know... Yet, through it all... [or is it underneath it all or above it all] you can still 'look' at yourself and see that you are OK.  You can choose to live in this part of you which is OK anytime you choose it to be so.

May you choose your OKayness as often and as much as possible.

If you are not okay, what are you resisting...  what are you holding on to...  what are you telling yourself that keeps you from connecting to your OKayness.

May you connect to your OKayness.

With this breath you take just now, there is an okayness present.  You only need to allow it to be so.

May you allow your OKayness to be so.

A New Day Always

Today is April 23, 2018.  Today, on April 23, 1991, I married my best friend; in Kauai, at sunset.  There was a double rainbow in the sky.  We were on a beautiful green lawn that sat at the edge of the ocean.

Today, 27 years later, we are celebrating our married life together.  There has been magical and fabulous times; breathtaking and beyond my wildest dreams experiences.  We have also known great challenges. Through it all, the love never ceased.

The most miraculous thing was creating a human being; a baby; a child; a girl; a daughter that came from our love.  She grew from our bond.  She blessed us and has been our greatest teacher.

I believe we made a pact before coming to Earth that we would teach each other what we came to Earth to learn and we would challenge, engage and support each other and our daughter as only our bond could produce.  It has been the journey of my lifetime.

We have been so blessed.  I have been so blessed.  We have been dating each other, 'soully' (solely),  since 1985.  I like to say that our relationship is as 'hard as a rock'.

My dear husband - Thank you for being my 'one' and traveling this journey with me.  I believe many of our best days and times are still ahead of us.

May you believe that there are plenty of your best days and times ahead of you.

As I think about 27 years, my mind goes to our 10th wedding anniversary that we celebrated by going back to Hawaii with our daughter and had such joy and fun sharing this place and our oh so happy memories with her.  It truly blows my mind that that trip was 17 years ago.

Time waits for no one.  Today is the only day that we can truly live in.

May you give yourself the present of being present to today; this moment; this breath.  May you know that you are living and that this is life.  You are experiencing life and living.  Do your life as only you can from the truth of who you are and through the experiences that show themselves to you.  May you live with your heart and mind open and free.  

Booyah!  May you be uniquely you and celebrate same.

Got to Move It Move It

I learned today, in this moment, that 'antsy' for me means stuck energy.  Energy that is flowing through my body sporadically, chaotically, and pent up and trying to find its place.

I got to the point where I was feeling so 'antsy' that I had to move it, move it.  It was the only thing to do.

So, I put on music and moved.   I danced, I exercised, I squatted and I reached.  Man, did it feel good.

I got the energy moving and I am more relaxed within myself.  

May you always be open to an answer and let the answer(s) flow through you.  Perhaps, no words are necessary.  Perhaps, all that is necessary is an inner knowing; an inner connection.

May you move it move it anytime you feel the need, get a chance or just know it is the right thing for you to do.  Move it; in whatever way that works for You.

Antsy

It is an 'antsy' day for me today.  My husband missed his flight and had to book another flight for a later landing.  It is wonderful he can still get in today.   It is only 7 hours difference than when he was originally supposed to land.

And, yet, I feel discombobulated.  The way I thought my day was going to 'play out' is not the way it is playing out.

I am grateful he is safe.   I am grateful we can still do the day.  I am grateful how it is all working out... And, still, I sit with my insides feeling chaotic.

How interesting and how 'unfun'.

I'm breathing.   I'm walking the dogs.   I'm enjoying the warm temperatures.  I'm talking to friends.  And, I still sit in discombobulation...

What is a woman to do....   !

We are having crabs that were sent in from Maryland tonight.  I have them on ice and I can smell the bay seasoning.  My daughter and her boyfriend are coming to enjoy them with us.  I won't eat so many because of my hands.   I will enjoy some.

Out of sorts.   Uncalm.  Uncool.  NOT as cool as a cucumber.

This is where I find myself.  I don't like it.  I'm not being very good at accepting it.  I am open to flowing with it and allowing whatever is going on with me to process, feel, be and let happen.  I love myself through.

Every day can't be easy.  Every moment can't be fun.  I can't always be cool (lol).  I can always be open to the flow and the trusting of the process of life.

This human experience is quite the ride.   May you ride it out as only you do.

May you be open to acceptance, flow, allowance and self-love.  

May you breathe and know that you are.

May you be as cool as you can be as often as possible.  Ha.!

Life is an adventure.  May we all open up to it...