Be U: Shine On

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Thursday, June 9, 2016

Shine On

I'd like to start with Shine On You Crazy Diamond....

I made it through the dentist visit with ease! Yay, Yay me! The technician seemed to think my mouth got smaller. And, she was wonderful with me and I'm all good to go.

I am so grateful. I am now saying that I have beautiful, strong teeth and gums. It doesn't hurt to think this way. And, in the present moment, I do!

It has been a couple of busy days. Many, and I mean many, people have been challenged, changing, in deep and, from where I sit, doing a really good job at being aware and willing to create their best path in the now.

This is very exciting for me. This is really cool for me. This makes me so happy and thrilled. The day when we all (or most of us) are living in our best and truest 'place', our world will also be in its best and truest place. I know this is peace amongst all and within each self.

My hubby is getting a convertible. What fun! I'm so happy for his thrill in buying himself something that will give him great pleasure. I certainly will enjoy vroom vrooming around with the roof down and the stars and the sun shining on us.

I went to a 'psychic' yesterday and it reinforced what I know and feel about myself and my future. That I know better than anyone about me and that I am where I am supposed to be and I am going where I feel (and 'just know') I will go from within my own inner and deep knowing.

May you believe that what you know and feel about yourself and your future is what makes it real and what makes it so; more than anything. May you believe and respond from a place of 'knowing'. That you know more about you and where you are supposed to be and where you are supposed to go than anything or anyone outside of yourself.

I am still learning (and practicing) to be aware of the reality of what is (100% reality not something I think I know or believe to be true); to be kind to myself during all experiences; and to be open to living [and sharing when appropriate] what I feel and know from a place of love. The only thing I truly have control of is my responses to situations, to other people and to life as it presents itself.

It is time to be the grandest of self.

Perhaps, to cooperate with our own self or be forced to learn how to... that these two choices just may be the most crucial choices in front of most of us just now. If we don't cooperate and love our self through, we will be shown and/or taught things that will demand that we are.

May you allow easy and may you believe that it doesn't have to be hard.

Shine on you beautiful diamond. Shine on.

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My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!