Be U: Looking, Open, Time

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Friday, June 10, 2016

Looking, Open, Time

I am looking. I am open to it being time for me to connect to the outside world in a professional way.

I am so excited when I help another connect to their best path. I do not know what their best path is. I do know how to listen to hear what people are telling me it is, through their shared words and their unconscious (or unknown/unaware) picture of what they are experiencing and reverberating this information back to them.

I love doing this. It comes so natural (now). I am so grateful for this 'gift'; this training; this connection to all that I find myself experiencing and living from within without.

It is one of my greatest joys. I feel so alive. I have endless energy around it.

Did I just write I have endless energy - wowza! woo hoo!

I truly am ready. In this moment anyway!

I am looking for someone or something, somehow to show up for me and show me my best path to do this. I am open for signs. I am open for possibilities. I am open for requests. I am open for reality to hit me where it counts and bring me into the professional life of life coaching and "Just 9Be U".

I am so ready to bring all that I am, know, breathe and love to the professional world and stop shrugging off my responsibility to enhance, support, create, allow, help mold more fulfilled souls/beings into and creating a more fulfilling world.

I am looking for me to show up somewhere, somehow; to someone and step into my next professional role. I am ready to commit - one discussion, share, connection, growth at a time. I am ready to grow myself complete, which includes a life coaching profession, to support others to grow their own selves complete.

It is in each and every one of us. All that is needed is a willingness, an openness and courage to look our self in the mirror, so to speak, and allow/feel truth, love, emotions and strong, deep feelings to flow, process, evolve and recreate from what we have taught ourselves to live as since childhood to how we are truly living presently to what brings us most peace and fulfillment to live life in the now and going forward.

I remember being in a gym and saying out loud 'oh, I wish there was an easier way to get in shape and to looking good/being strong.' A person nearby responded 'at least there is a way'! Oh how true they were.

So, while we may wish there was an easier way of moving forward, creating wholeness, lessening any pain or struggle, knowing peace... at least there is a way! And, your way is inside of you. The greatest thing about al of this, perhaps, is the easier way is already something you know; something you innately know and are connected to. !

Everything you need for this lifetime of yours, you already have. You only need to connect to it, feel it and build upon it. And, you win.

I want to win. So, I open my mind, my heart, my belief that I will do this. I shut down the noise in my head that asks me who am I to do this.. it will take way more than I am capable of giving.. to you won't be able to handle all the demands on yourself...

Yes. Yes. I can. If it is meant for me... If it is inside of me to want to do it... If it is inside of me to dream this dream... If it is inside of me to learn, grow, connect and create... Then, yes it is. It is inside of me to let it out. It is my innate knowing. It is my innate responsibility. It is my innate calling.

I am fully open to answer the call...

I am well prepared. I am ready. I need to do this.

May my life rain/reign down on me. I am open to ME.

May your life rain/reign down on you. May you be open to YOU.

May it be shown (and lived out) to us with as much ease, fun, joy, awesomeness and wonder as possible. Amen

May you allow thyself to be mesmerized!!

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My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!