Be U: Monday

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Monday, May 23, 2016

Monday

Monday, Monday.

Many frown on Monday. It isn't Monday that makes us frown. It is what we associate to Monday. Back to work. Back to School. Back to a schedule. Back to having to get up early and get out of the house. And, many other reasons; most likely.

What about the people that have off on Mondays... It is their sleep-in day.   It is their day of rest.

What if we could choose to think of Monday as a day; just a day.   Yes, all of the above may be true and, yet, really, it is just a day. And, most of us have been doing Mondays like we do them for a long time. Our heads haven't popped off. We have never not made it through a Monday. Just what if, TGIM could be a thing.

It is a great time to set intention(s) for the week. It is a great time to slowly get back into the schedule. I hear some saying 'slowly - not a chance'. Well, then, what if we could get back into the week of things however we feel we must, but with a 'helpful' mindset.

Grateful we have a job to go to. Grateful we have friends to visit. Grateful we have opportunities to learn. Grateful for who we are and what we know and the wonderful weekend we may have just had.

No, life isn't exactly as we want it to be. But, we can bring our exact true self with us into it.

Just, what if we relaxed into it; into our Monday.

Today, I am alone. I have the groomer coming at noon. And, after (and before) this, I can do as I please. Sounds beautiful.   And, if I don't use this time doing just that, I can create hell for myself. If I do what I think I'm supposed to do instead of what I wish to do - there is a difference.  Yet, we are the only ones that get to label and judge it all. What we think about 'it', is what we create..  just maybe.

Being an adult and being responsible, I suppose, has to be a balance of getting things done that have to be done (still my choice/my priority/my option) and doing the things that make my soul and heart sing and happy.

My goal for today is to move; to start an exercise program for just me. To move just a bit more than yesterday and to enjoy the things that I find myself doing. We have been walking as a family and I so enjoy it. I want to move as me and enjoy this also. I want to look forward to an hour of 'me time' moving me again.

May you let Monday be your friend. May you let all days be your friend.

As you bring your true, loving self to each situation; each situation sort of/kind of becomes your friend.

A true, loving self can feel whatever you feel; think whatever you think AND recognize how it floats or deflates 'your boat'. Decide on if you want to keep the approach you are currently experiencing or change it up some.

May you choose floating as opposed to deflating. May you choose expansion as opposed to constricting. May you choose you and kindness to self as opposed to others and harshness with self. In this, 'others' are more comfortable around us and get our best self instead of something else.

May you let Monday work for and/or with you instead of against you. Just saying. It just may be an option. I hope it is...

Things are allowed to feel hard, difficult, uneasy, tiring, lonely, frustrating.   Bring this with you, and, if possible, bring this with you from a place of knowing you are this; owning you are this; and allow the 'best' you to deliver same... whoop, whoop.   I may be onto something here.   May you grab it and fly if it feels good on you...

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My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!