Intensity

I feel the greatest intensity I may have ever connected to.  I believe there is great change happening in and around me/us.  I am trusting myself to know that I am good.  I am hopeful that you find yourself believing you are good, too. Even in the intensity/chaos, there is peace.  We only need to connect to it. 

I am open to hearing, feeling, believing and behaving from my innermost part of my (peaceful) self.

May you be open to hearing, feeling, believing and behaving from your innermost part of your (peaceful) self.

 

What's Uppeee

I come here to write on a heavy rain, temperature dropping, beautifully serene day.  The palm trees dance in the rain and the greenery and landscaping reaches up to connect to the wholeness of each drop that lands to feed it.  It is quiet.  It is loud.  It is just as it needs to be.

I went to the doctor this morning to try to get a better handle and understanding on the drugs that I am on and the new drugs that are offered to me.  I have a great resistance to take more.  I have an inkling of determination to not let them be a part of my every day life any more. 

I cannot find the kind of help I wish to have to walk in and through this.   I cannot understand or commit to messing with my own chemistry any more through chemical drugs.  I know they are great for some.  I know they have allowed me to live a very 'fulfilling' life in the past during a whole lot of pain.  I think that I know I need to go in a different direction now.

This scares me and excites me.  I do not know how to accomplish this.  I only know that a large part of me is open to accomplish this. 

I am curious to see who I am without medicine.  It has been thousands of moons since I have lived medicine free.

Are some of my feelings, irritations and nuances because of drugs... 

I have experienced an awful lot of change, loss and challenges recently.  I think I'm supposed to feel a lot of the 'stuff' I feel as I find myself on 'change, loss and challenge street'.  As I am open for 'easy street', I invite myself to feel my way to it.  I support myself just as I am.   I do not ask why I do not feel better.   I ask myself to love myself just as I feel responding to what is.

Deep, Deep, Deep...

Many of us are in deep just now.  The flutter of life feeling like King Kong and the new every day changes and challenges that many of us are experiencing -- 'invite' us to feel unlike we've ever felt before. 

It is okay.  We are okay.  You are okay. 

May you feel what you feel.  May you speak what you feel and let love and your unique self walk you through on this journey that we call life. 

JUST BE U -- Just be everything you feel, everything you think, everything you are.  Keep what rocks your world in a way that excites you.  Let go of what rocks your world in a way that weighs you down.  Walk with the wholeness of you and experience life as only you can.  It may really just be awesome...

Where I'm At

Overloaded, under informed, connected to much, disconnected from ease....

Oh boy, do I feel LIFE. 

I am living it fully and fulfilled.

Fulfilled not in the way I thought fulfillment was but in a way that I surely feel my full self.

I feel a full head of heaviness and full hands of sensitivity.  My heart beats cheerily.

I feel unsure about how I feel and I know that I know little 100% for certain.

I am open to walking anew.   I am open to knowing anew.  I am open to whatever it is 'life' has in store for me and I have in store for myself.

I know I am good even when I do not feel so.  I know I am okay even when I feel totally challenged on several levels. 

I know that I am me and all I need do is bring me into and with every situation I encounter and every breath I take.

Life is chaotic just now.  Life is a loose bundle of everything that it can be.  There is love.  There is war. 

Many, if not most, are thinking about what feels better in them and on them.  This is interesting and enlightening.  I hope love is our answer and we can all connect to and live it with as much ease as possible in each moment.

I'm a loose bundle of everything just now and I softly push myself to come here as it is hard for me to believe I can put a sentence together out of the noise I am experiencing.

I experience on.

May you experience your truth in everything that you do; in every breath you take.  This can be done.  I believe in you.  May you let it be as you experience you as you are today.  Live on from here.  Live out from who you are.  Share it and participate with it lovingly. 

                                                        Unknown

Fan

I feel like there is a big universal fan on and it is blowing information, people, walks of life, thoughts, and ideas all into coagulating together....

I can't catch or let go of just one 'fly by' situation or thought.  It is as if we are all swirling as one big tornado with each of us being a particle of the same 'storm'.   I feel like information and feelings are at an all time high.

Bring your true self into it; with it; through it; around it; away from it as best you can in the manner that serves the deepest and most connected part of you and your complete truth.

Honor what you feel, no matter how or what you feel, through your eyes of love and light.  If, [just if] you find yourself feeling like you are a particle being thrown around without your own consent - hear, honor and respond to exactly what it is that you feel inside.  Be with your breath and these feelings and watch as you stay open to the opportunity to be the 'eye of the storm'.  Find your peace, quiet, gentleness and calm and walk on from here obeying what feels best on and inside of you.

Together, we heal.  Together, we grow.  Together, we create.

May you bring your most unique, loving and whole self into the togetherness of our world.

Party on!   Yikes...  !?!?

                                                    Unknown

1997

The last time I lived, with everything I owned, under one roof was 1997.  Wowza.

Last night I got the last of the deliveries from up north.  I am now, again, living under one roof.  All of my belongings and my family are under one roof.  Huge!  Huge!  Huge!

For me, this is somewhat unknown and unchartered territory.  It is exciting.  It is whole.  It is simple, I think...

I have a garage full of boxes and all of me is in one place physically and, perhaps, spiritually and emotionally.

I trust myself that whatever comes my way, I am okay.  I trust that what I feel and think is exactly where I need to be in this moment.

All of me - the good, the great, the hard, the crazy, the challenging, the ease of, the love... is ever present and I accept my one-ness with myself.  What I am on the inside is also on the outside. 

I give myself permission to embrace all that I am.  The parts of my body I always paid attention to at wanting it to be better, I accept (mostly).  The parts of me that I love, I empower.  The feelings that do not feel good on me, I allow and the thoughts that mess with me, I experience.

This is huge. 

I do not know what I do or where I go from here and it does not matter.  I am good in this moment and this moment I experience as it shows itself to me. 

I am a work in progress; under construction and living my life through the truth of what and who I am.  Good stuff.!

May you live your experience(s) through the truth of what and who you are.

May you allow your life to be built; to evolve; and to grow into whatever the real you can grow from the depth of yourself.  Now, this is what I've always wanted to know and experience as far back as I can remember!!!  Yay me! 

                                                  Unknown

TMI

I am on information overload.  There is so much information swirling around in our world; landing in certain places, hovering over our lives and coming from within. 

What is a person to do....

Be with what is.

Trust ourselves to be okay with whatever comes our way.

Trust that the Universe/God/Etc. has a plan for us and it is a great overall one.

Embrace and love every part of ourselves as it has made us into who we are today and at the depth of ourselves there is only love and connection.

Keep the information that feels true or 'right' to us.

Delete or send love to the information that feels untrue or 'wrong' to us.

Know that everything comes and happens and evolves as it is supposed to for our fullest overall fulfillment and growth.

Live the life that is inside of you outside of yourself, through love.

Support others in their beliefs while always being true to your own. 

Allow what is to be as you send love and live your truth out into our world.

Live who you are as an individual together with everyone you encounter.

TMI overload...  May you know and live your truth.

And, so it is.

May you know and live thyself.

                                                               Unknown

Two of Spades

I picked the Two of Spades from a group of cards.  I haven't done this in a couple of months due to when I was previously doing it, it had felt so right in leading me into the house that I fell in love with.   When that didn't happen, I seemed to have stopped because I do not understand why I feel like I got so many 'signs' and 'signals' that that was the house for me and it just wasn't so.

However, today, it felt the right thing to do and with the Two of Spades comes this information by Serena Powers.

Two of Spades:
"Two: Separation, gossip and deceit. Difficult changes."

I have been through some difficult and huge changes these past two plus years.  I gave up my big, safe home up north and am now living full time down south (which was my dream since I was 17).  I lost a few of my dearest animals and the process of all of it was challenging and the realization was that my home was truly inside of myself and not outside of myself.

I experienced death of people that their energy was a huge part of who and what I am.  They were in my life since my first breath here on Earth.  I learned about how to live life sharing these beautiful human's souls' transitioning.  None had an easy way of it and still through the greatest of their despair, I have experienced the greatest depth of their beauty. 

I feel an 'air' coming in pushing the rest through.  I feel ease starting to show it's beautiful presence ever so slightly again.

I AM READY FOR EASE.  I know ease. 

May you experience where you've been, where you are and be open to the greatness of where you want to go...