Be U: Beliefs

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Friday, August 3, 2018

Beliefs

We all have our own beliefs. One thing happened once to create a certain belief. We were raised with certain beliefs and belief patterns.

We decided to think about something a certain way because this belief worked (or protected) us at a certain point in our lives and it is no longer working for us now.

I hear people say that 'there is not enough time in a day'... How does this belief make you feel... Is there a better belief to take on that would bring you a happier, more content you...

'I will never be able to do that.' Here is another one. Is this true... Do you know 100% without a sliver of possibility that this is true... Who would you be without this thought... especially if it is something that you would love to do. Maybe you just don't really want to do it; and that is okay. Maybe what you end up being able to do is exactly what you are supposed to do.

If you hear and listen to your beliefs and they feel like they may be holding you back, can you change the thought, the pattern, the wording of such a belief...

I have a belief that I have restrictions on my ability to do things because of scleroderma. While this may be true for some things, I am certain that it is not as true (nor powerful/debilitating) as I let myself believe.

I must ponder my beliefs and change them up so I can meet myself where I am truly at now and be and act like my very own best friend. Supporting beliefs only.

May you, when and if it is time, support yourself through your beliefs; be your own best friend. Keep the ones that empower and expand your life. Change the ones that diminish and hold you back from doing things that you may want to do.

What we believe is true, we live as such. If we think we can, we very possibly can. If we think we cannot, we very possibly cannot.

May you allow only happy, strong, empowering, uplifting and feel good thoughts; as much and as often as possible.

If you are being called to do something, do it - try it. There is no failure in trying. There is only winning and learning lessons.

If it is in you to want it, it is in you to do it. I believe. I believe in you. I believe in me.

May you too.

Thank you.

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My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!