Be U: Under Construction

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Saturday, November 18, 2017

Under Construction

Our world and much in it feels like it is under construction.

Many people's lives are topsy turvy, upside down, changing, challenging, freeing and just plain different.

There are many disasters, danger zones and powerful energies to process, change, grow, do better and create anew through.

Many of us are feeling overwhelmed, at times.

It is, perhaps, in this 'overwhelmness' that the greatest possibilities show themselves.

I know my stress level is not pointing to calm. I know that I feel in disarray and sometimes blind to any good answers. I know I walk forward merely by questioning my goal in the moment; relying on my faith and trust that I am where I am supposed to be; and knowing for sure that what is being created through me is what is supposed to be created for me and for our world.

May you walk forward knowing your goal in the moment of feeling overwhelmed. May you rely on your faith and trust that you are where you are supposed to be. May you know for sure that what is being created through you is the best possible for mankind and for mother nature. When we create with an open heart and mind, miracles and ease show up.

We are a work in progress. We are here to tap into and 'grow' our own light. We are here to participate in shining a light on our own experiences, situations, innate knowing and the oneness that is connected from the depth of who we are.

As we go through the oh so many 'construction zones', may we add/extend/offer the light. It is our job to follow and create the best lit paths. It is our job to connect to our own peace, love and joy. It is our job to live in the light. It is our job to be the light. It is our job to let the light win over the darkness. It is our job to create, participate and live in the best version of our self. It is our job to say what our job is...

It is not so much our surroundings. It is more how we reply to our surroundings. This is where peace can be destroyed or lived.

May we walk through, survive and do the work that has to be done in the construction zones and may we find ourselves 'in the zone' of positivity more and more and more.

Get in your most brilliant zone. Let the best, happiest and most fulfilling energies win.

Let what is 'light' to your being win.

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My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!