Be U

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Monday, April 22, 2013

Happy Earth Day

Today is Earth Day. We all have at least one thing in common... We are all living on Earth, right now, together!

May you notice 'under your feet' today and be thankful/grateful that there is always something under them to support you as you walk on.

May you find one gracious thing to do wherever your feet are finding themselves today on this grand Earth!

How nice to think that many will do just that. I feel the love already! May it come right back at you.

Sunday, April 21, 2013

The World

While thinking of where to go and what to do next with my life, I saw the tarot cards sitting in front of me under the glass table and I thought 'why not'.

So I spread them out face down and placed my hand above them and moved my hand until I felt heat. I picked three cards. These are the three I picked. I have picked at least one of these cards before. However, the World card gave me a giggle. I am here to save the World after all.......

Eight of Vessels
"Tarot wisdom: Your work is a creative endeavor, not mere labour. It is engrossing and emotionally satisfying. By immersing yourself in satisfying work, you become centred, and in turn find your centre, which is the Anima Mundi."

Queen of Coins
"Tarot wisdom: This card is the personification of health, wealth and wellbeing - a very fortunate state. It can represent our past or present condition, or a goal for the future, depending on its position in the reading.

The World
"Tarot Wisdom: The World is the achievement and culmination of our goals. On the highest level it is the merging of our individual personality with the Anima Mundi, the soul of the world. The Anima Mundi strains the ability of words to describe it, and it can seem paradoxical. To the Neoplatonic philosopher it is the highest form of the divine circumference of being. It is outside space and time, and yet here now. It is composed of neither matter nor energy, but is the mother of both, continually creating the universe. It is the intelligent, compassionate guide that is evident in the evolution of life. It is both masculine and feminine. Though dual-sexed, we call it 'she'.
The Anima Mundi has been with us guiding us throughout the journey; we could not be alive unless this was so. She was with us when we were the Fool in the beginning. We are still that same fool now; the only difference is that we have dropped our blindfold and have become conscious of her for the first time. Now we are aware of the infinite creative potential that was here all the time. This knowledge is bliss."

From the book "The Alchemical Tarot" by Rosemary Ellen Guiley and Robert M. Place

I believe we need to save ourselves before we can save anyone else. If I am not happy, I am miserable in the world. If I am happy, not a lot in our world bothers me.

May you be happy in our world.

Another picture from Facebook, same photographer as the Shells (beautiful work)

Home

I'm here at my current 'home' feeling stuck between what I knew and who I was to what I know and who I am and wondering where do I go from here. I have 'traveled' much these past few years and I have learned, experienced, and recreated many of my own thoughts. I feel I have achieved connecting to who I am on the inside and living this on the outside. I feel connected to myself on a deeper level than I've ever known.

While I feel happy, content and like I've achieved my ultimate goal, I thought achieving this would feel different than it does. While I'm enjoying this new connection with myself, I'm also feeling irritable at not using the new me to live fuller and touching others' lives and sharing happiness and laughter.

I have seen many people close to me become more aware of their own lives and their own choices and I've seen beautiful moments and enlightened connections they have with others and with me. It's extremely brilliant and exciting and I'm grateful to witness and experience these moments and to also hear about some of them. Sometimes they give me goosebumps; these connections that are so real and create such fulfillment in the relationship. This is HUGE and creates much happiness for me.

I've had a very lazy day today and I find myself feeling sorry for myself being alone (which is what I've created) and bored.

I'm knowing that feeling bored is good because it will create me to do things differently so I will not be bored in the future. And, right in this moment, being bored doesn't feel too good to me!

I'm finding it harder to write with where I am because it is new to me; it is uncomfortable even. I think the discomfort comes from lack of understanding and some uncertainty because I am so 'new' to myself. Eh gad.

So, in reality, I'm feeling it all. I'm feeling the freshness and the staleness. I'm feeling contentment and discontentment. I'm feeling excited and scared. I'm feeling alone and connected. This being human and experiencing much of what a human can experience is quite the challenge for me.

So, I guess, I'm kind of in a limbo. I'm caught between the person I was and what do I do with this person that I have evolved into.

We are all evolving whether we do it consciously or not. We all feel many human experiences and feelings. Sometimes we run or numb ourselves from these feelings. Sometimes we ignore them. Sometimes we let them go through us.

It is a choice that we can choose to make consciously. I have let many of my stuck emotions go through me these past several years and I am, for lack of better words, 'clean as I can be for today' and ready to imprint consciously and intelligently more life experiences on this being that is me as I travel the path that I'm here to travel.

I did not think I could get any nuttier! I was wrong! Ha.

May you live consciously and create your day to leave the people and yourself whose paths have crossed in a happier place than before you made contact.
Yeah, good luck with that... and it is possible if you are open to it.

Beautiful Photo taken from Facebook page

Loud and Clear

If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.
Jesus Christ, in the Gospel of Thomas

I believe many of us are being forced into doing just this. I know I am one of them. I have seen much beauty come from this truth between people recently.

May you choose to be forthcoming to the best of your ability always. May you see beauty in it each time you have the courage to speak your truth with kindness.

The sky outside my door the other night.

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Taken from "Torn" 4/16/13

"If you can imagine it, you can achieve it; if you can dream it, you can become it." – William Arthur Ward

Family Room

Formal DR

Formal LR

Informal DR/Fish Tank

Yoga Room

Sunbed Room

Kitchen

Master Bath

Automatic Blinds Up

Gym

Aerobic Room

Massage Room/

Shooting Star on Ceiling

Theatre

Sauna

I needed to share what my home was like before it was 'staged' by the realtors with some of my own pictures. I'm thankful that the sales video had expired that prompted me to post these pictures. I hope that my warm heart for this house transcends through these pictures to you.

May you create your own world of beauty; whatever is beautiful to you.

Inside of You

"Your head sits well on your shoulders and your heart is in the right place; and when the time comes, you'll know what to do."
Tom Selleck's character, Commissioner Reagan, on Blue Bloods TV Show

May you trust that when you are supposed to know, you will know.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Why

I had 'Rocky Road' ice cream with added walnuts and bananas in it and I didn't ask Why?. LOL

I thoroughly enjoyed it. I try to eat by questioning if I eat something, will I feel better or worse after eating it.

If I can say better and thoroughly enjoy what I eat, I believe my body digests it differently than if I eat it with guilt instead of pleasure. If I know that I'll feel worse after I eat it, my hope is that I will choose not to eat it at that particular time. Just saying....

Try it out if this rings true with you.

Happy joyful eating.

May you eat with pleasure and never guilt.

My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!