Be U: September 2024

Coming for the Real You.

I'm hoping to share thoughts, fun and insightful information and aha moments with all to better serve ourselves and the universe.

My background is that of Executive Secretary for the local Electric company (11 years).

Certified Personal Trainer (since 1991) and Fitness Consultant for my own company, Beachin Bodies (6 years) and certified in Reiki and Nutrition with training in Cranial Sacral work, Tai Chi, and Meditation. Certified as a Professional Life Coach (2015); Minister at Universal Life Church (2016);

and, possibly, most important,

my own journey through illness and avenues, roads and roadblocks that I have taken to find the real me. (35 plus years).

The me that I was born as. The me that is the all-knowing. I believe the search is endless and we are here to learn and to love and to share it all.

Saturday, September 14, 2024

Love Thyself

I come here without anything on my mind to share. I feel quiet. I feel when I ask myself when enough is enough, then it is probably enough Ha.

The world can feel messy. The world can feel amazing. The world can feel 'interesting'. The world can feel enough.

Our lives can feel messy, amazing, interesting and anywhere from not enough to enough to too much. I hope you can land on enough again and again and again.

May you stand in the truth that you feel, that you are experiencing, that you are surrounded by and that you are in... Be in the truth of all that shows up for you and through you.

If there is confusion or uncertainty, perhaps, stand outside of yourself (so to speak) and look in. When you feel uncertain, may you ask yourself what is one thing that feels good to do or think just now that is available to you. Now. Just now. In this moment. In this breath. What makes you feel most like You. Most true to You. Go there with everything possible.

Step by step. Reel by reel. Do by do. Be by be. Truth through love.

May you do something that gives yourself your own love.

You can fill yourself up. You can fulfill your self; your life's meaning. You are unique.

May you let yourself be your unique self.

May you let love.

Try it. You just may love You.

How beautiful that would be; this is.

May you just be your beautiful self; as much and as often as possible.

Know thy beautiful self. Oh yeah.

Monday, September 9, 2024

You

What you were taught is not you.

What you label yourself, is not all that you are.

What others label you is only yours to experience if you buy into or own it to be true.

What you feel is not everything you.

It can feel like a confusing time for many of us just now. It can be a beautiful and wonderful time to live, breathe and become more aware regarding who is the You that resides about and is able to be connected to this (your) human experience.

You, there and present now, watching and realizing your experiences, is who you are creating and building yourself to be. How you respond can be in your awareness and choice.

'You' are so much more. You are greater than yourself. You are capable and able to watch your breath, realize your feelings, experience your experiences; adapt and/or change.

You are the one that can delve into your labels of what you do, how you relate, what you share, what you enjoy and what you may be wishing you would stop doing now. Ha.

Labels such as sister, brother, mother, father, aunt, uncle, enthusiast, friend, your professional label(s)...

Who Are You without any labels...

This is the 'energy' that may benefit you the most to meet, be with, love, understand and live from.

Can you watch your breath... Can you watch your reactions... Can you change both up through your awareness of same and choice in same...

Yes.

You can...

You can slow your breath, breathe deeper, breathe longer, take quicker breaths, hold it, relax it - do all kinds of things with it.

You can watch how you react to anything and anyone and choose if it feels free and easy or the opposite of this and everything in between. You can change any and every reaction you have as you choose to.

Like the band "The Who" asked... "Who Are You?"

May you explore and know who you are and who you want to be, how you want to experience life and be open to enjoying and living in the loving truth of just this... YOU.

My Past Story

The first thing I would always tell a new doctor was 'my dad left me when I was 10'. He just disappeared, ran away. It was pretty awful for me. I thought it was my fault as most kids sometimes do. I thought I was unlovable. Years later, 20 maybe, I realized it wasn't just that my dad left me that affected my life, but also that my mom stayed. She stayed and I'll be forever grateful. However, her staying wasn't all peaches and creme. She was so hurt, so distraught, so frightened to raise three kids on her own and find a job that it was very hard for her to be there for me and my needs. I chose to shutdown, be quiet and try not to make it any harder on her as to not ask for much, or voice much, or need much.

Years later, in 11/12th grade, I noticed my fingers being really cold and hurting all the time. I noticed them turning purple and the pain was very 'loud'. Humorously enough, I had chosen to be a secretary and typing was a big part of my everyday. I loved it even. Fingers flying across the keyboard with as little mistakes as possible was the goal. I was pretty good at it. While in typing class, I remember putting my hands on my neck to try to warm them and make them feel better. I was naive enough then to think this must be happening to everyone.

Anyway, years went by and nobody was able to tell me why this was happening or what to do to make it better. Then, approximately 4 years later, I remember (what I felt) was little me sitting across from a really big doctor at his really big desk and him telling me I was allergic to myself. Of course, this was him describing to me what auto-immune meant. I had a disease called scleroderma and it could kill me (sometimes in as little as five years) and I would most likely be on medicine and have it for the rest of my life and there was nothing to change it.

Anyway, almost 30 years later, I've had my share of pain and I'm alive. I've had ulcerations on my fingers and I have lost most of my nails on both hands from lack of circulation and producing too much collagen. My hands are somewhat not a pretty sight and to hit something with one of my fingers by accident (well, I refer to the feeling as 'going to the moon).

When I was about 30, I started looking at alternative medicine and I tried anything that came across my path to try to stop the pain. I have tried many normal and not so normal 'ideas'. I sometimes do not believe at what lengths I went to try to ease my pain and suffering!

This is what has brought me here to this point in my life.

I'm grateful to be able to learn so much about myself and life and I wouldn't take it back (well, some days I might want to).

Something was telling me to blog. I really didn't know much about blogging - I am still a novice at best. Approximately 5 weeks ago, I sat at my computer and started typing.

I am surprised at where my blogs have led me. I thought I was trying to help others and that still is a big goal of mine. However, what I am finding out is that this is a great outlet for me.

A way to feel like I'm doing something. I told a friend this morning about my blog and I said that it's draining because I put everything out there and do not hold back as I post each individual blog; its fun because it does give me an outlet and I feel a little purpose in my life; and it's scary because I don't want anyone laughing at me or telling me that I am completely 'off my rocker'!