Resistance

I feel more and more resistance within to come here. 

Am I tired of being out of my comfort zone by exploring the depth of myself...

Does my head hurt because it wants a rest exploring what I feel, think, know and do...

I would think that if I am coming up with these questions so easily, it is most likely the case.

I have been out of my comfort zone a long time; more on than off.  I have found my contentment in accepting what is.

How can I be in both a discomfort zone and contentment.   I have no clue.

If I were to delve a bit deeper, it, again, comes from accepting one's self.  It is this simple and this difficult for me.

There is still a part of me that doesn't find comfort in my strange, tight mouth; my hands being deformed and my discomfort being in my own body.  It feels like I have not fully accepted a body as a part of who I am.  This being human is the hardest part of living.  Ha. (and, yes, it is what living is all about on the surface)

By this, I mean the fitting into society and doing what is right as a whole and following rules and regulations that I do not agree with.  Gossip is something I find very uncomfortable.

It keeps coming back to walking forward.  Live by bringing my truest self into every situation I encounter and move through and on from this place.  This thought; saying; way of being is what gives me the greatest comfort.

I may not be able to do this or that, but I can love.

I may not look like this or that, but I can love.

I may not know much, but I can love.

I can love.

This, I can do.  This is my choice for my underlying way of life.

May you choose something, as your underlying way of life, that supports your extreme comfort.