Wow

With all the therapy, cleansings, strategies, belief changes and medical and alternative situations I have tried, I still sit aghast with myself at times.  This is one of those times.

My energy level is lower than I want it to be.  My mind is not as clear as I want it to be.  Many a issue is upon me that I wish were not.  Mmmmm

This is what I call 'fighting what is'.  I do feel the stress of it, the agitation of it, the darkness of it.  I do not like it much at all. 

So, change it....  This is what is the collective answer that I hear...Accept it or change it...WELL, if I knew how to - wouldn't I?  It feels so hard.  It feels CLOSE to impossible.  It feels dark and heavy.

So, as I go to the dentist; as I call about my dog's end of life; I am in darkness.  For me, these two things are scary and what I think of as dark.

So, I play it out in my head....

If there was no dentist to go to; this could be much worse.  If there was no one to call to help me with my old dog, it could be even more horrendous.  So, I hear myself thinking it could be worse.  I know this in my heart and in my head it could be worse.  Yet, the choices in front of me are not my favorite. 

I trust the process of life; I trust myself and I trust others.  This faith of what is, perhaps, is all I have right now.  And, it is enough.  We walk through the darkness into the light time and time again.

I'm looking forward to feeling more light.

May you know and feel the light that is all around you and within you today.  May you be able to trust the process of life.