Inner Turmoil

I've become accustomed to verifying who I am through things; moments, beliefs.  Who would I be without a nice car?  Who would I be without thinking I look pretty?  Who would I be without 4 dogs?  Who would I be without nice jewelry?

 I know I am still me without my wedding rings because I haven't worn them for 2 plus years because of my fingers. AND I'm still me. 

When I think I look pretty, I feel so much stronger going out in the world; then when I feel I do not look pretty.  Does the world care?  Mostly, no.  I'll never forget the first time I didn't get all dolled up and dressed nice to fly on an airplane.  I remember wearing no makeup.  AND, nothing was different but me!  It was quite an eye opener for me.  I would love you to try to be opposite of what you are used to being.

People go about their business whether I have make up on or not.  People go about their business whether I drive a new car or an old car.  People go about their business whether I have a wedding ring on or not.

So, what really defines me?  How people feel when they are around me.  I believe this is what we remember most about others.  Not what they wear, not how they look; it's how we felt when we were with them.

So, why do I create inner turmoil to be what I think is the perfect me for the outside world to see.  Why do I create inner turmoil to create an image that people will relate to?  Is it the 'relate' part that truly only matters.  I think so.  Can I let go of my image and still be me?

Interesting......

Who would U be if you didn't always look good; weren't always smart; or funny; or whatever it is that U think U always have to be.  Without this, who are U?

If we just accepted and showed who we are in each moment - would the inner turmoil diminish.

Would we be able to survive in this world.  Dare I try to find out.